# If you have a sidewalk and old bushes, you're probably an idiot. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 11, 2019, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902 "2019-07-11T13:27:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2019, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/21 "2019-07-11T21:21:38Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > This one time, I was outside whacking this huge bush— really going to town on it— when out of nowhere, this woman walks up and starts screaming 'bout how my huge tool uses too much gas. And I’m like, naw, baby, mine’s _electric_! Totally true story. The problem was that your huge tool was so old and raggedy-assed that just its presence in the neighborhood was enough to tank the property values on the block. I saw actual pictures of that beat down piece of shit bush trimmer. That lady probably thought you were an immigrant or something. ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2019, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/22 "2019-07-11T21:46:06Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > And why do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway, huh? You’d better hope that Miller does not see this. That is insta-ban material. ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2019, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/23 "2019-07-11T22:43:54Z")
I’ve considered changing my screen name to **Rosa Parksinthedrivewayanddrivesontheparkway** , but it’s probably too long. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2019, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/24 "2019-07-11T23:51:56Z")
I trimmed my bush just the other day. Anybody want pictures? ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/25 "2019-07-12T00:39:46Z")
What if you have some kind of mutant super-fast-growing shrub-like alien abomination that doesn’t overgrow the sidewalk because it’s nowhere near it, but constantly overgrows your own driveway and entrance to your house? Does that make you an idiot? I say no, that just makes you a lazy shit who refuses to get around to deal with the mutant shrub. I dealt with it once, by paying a guy with a chainsaw to cut it down to the stump and haul it away. But this thing is a mutant alien. It starting growing again out of the stump before I got around to removing the stump, and is now bigger than ever, proudly waving in the breeze. I’m bringing him back to cut it down again, and this time the stump is either going to be ground down to wood chips or pulled out. No one has been able to identify this shrub, which I did not plant, which confirms my suspicion that it’s from Neptune. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/26 "2019-07-12T01:53:31Z")
I experienced the annoyingness of this yesterday when I was scootering around. The street was scary so I decided to go on the sidewalk for a couple of blocks. My punishment for breaking the law was dealing with bushes spilling over onto the sidewalk and forcing me onto the grass. My scooter doesn’t do grass very well so my ride wasn’t as fun as it could have been. I know mine is a very trivial inconvenience, but it did remind me how hard folks in wheelchairs and mobility scooters have it when side walks are blocked or messed up. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/27 "2019-07-12T03:04:35Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Why are they called 'side’walks? What are they on the ‘side’ of? I’m perplexed. I think what has you confused is because you live in the backwoods you might have never seen a sidewalk. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/28 "2019-07-12T03:19:41Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > I think what has you confused is because you live in the backwoods you might have never seen a sidewalk. 😉 She may have never seen a paved street. My problem is my neighbor’s hedge that right up against my driveway. He’s very good at keeping it trim, but it hangs over my driveway at least a foot. When I’m backing out of the garage I have to make sure to clear the hedge, then turn in time to miss the house (and save the rear-view mirrors). I learned this the hard way, the time the corner of the car hit the corner of the house, which is brick. Not pretty. If I hadn’t had to swerve around the hedge, I wouldn’t have hit the house. ---
**Author:** ![OldOlds](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a3d4f5/32.png) [@OldOlds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OldOlds)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/29 "2019-07-12T03:21:11Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > I trimmed my bush just the other day. Anybody want pictures? I tried for a long time to come up with a “is it an X or a Y” bush based on gender, but I got nothing. Perhaps someone more clever than I can do it. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/30 "2019-07-12T03:24:23Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > She may have never seen a paved street. Why, they had to throw her on her back to get shoes on her. When she was twenty-four. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/31 "2019-07-12T03:28:03Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Why are they called 'side’walks? What are they on the ‘side’ of? I’m perplexed. It used to be that people were perfectly comfortable walking in the street before automobiles became common. Horse drawn carriages weren’t typically all that fast and they didn’t pose much of a danger to pedestrians. So the sidewalk is to the side of the main thoroughfare. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/32 "2019-07-12T05:21:45Z")
As a gardening business proprietor I’d strongly suggest a flame thrower (with a safe 40 foot max. output) to take care of encroaching bushes/hedges/shrubs only if they’re on the verge of death, making them flammable, otherwise - if they’re still green, they’re fucking useless to fry, and you have to stand there for, like, ever, until they finally catch. The zen-like patience of such flame-thrower use can be spiritually rewarding, too: passersby will see your ‘halo’. **AHunter3** : Good to hear you (well, _had_ to) finally took things into your own hands. Just because you never planted the shit there in the first place isn’t really much of a mitigating consideration, kinda, right? ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/33 "2019-07-12T05:30:41Z")
I owe a lot to sidewalks. They’ve been keeping me off the streets for years. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/34 "2019-07-12T09:22:49Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > What if you have some kind of mutant super-fast-growing shrub-like alien abomination that doesn’t overgrow the sidewalk because it’s nowhere near it, but constantly overgrows your own driveway and entrance to your house? Does that make you an idiot? > > I say no, that just makes you a lazy shit who refuses to get around to deal with the mutant shrub. I dealt with it once, by paying a guy with a chainsaw to cut it down to the stump and haul it away. But this thing is a mutant alien. It starting growing again out of the stump before I got around to removing the stump, and is now bigger than ever, proudly waving in the breeze. I’m bringing him back to cut it down again, and this time the stump is either going to be ground down to wood chips or pulled out. No one has been able to identify this shrub, which I did not plant, which confirms my suspicion that it’s from Neptune. Ooooh! Post an ID thread here, if you can link pics! I wanna see a Neptunian shrub. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/35 "2019-07-12T12:23:47Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > My problem is my neighbor’s hedge that right up against my driveway. He’s very good at keeping it trim, but it hangs over my driveway at least a foot. AIUI, you’re within your rights to trim anything that hangs over on your side of the property line. IIWY, I’d get busy with a hedge trimmer, and reclaim the full width of your driveway. ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/36 "2019-07-12T13:48:23Z")
I’m totally on board with this pit. I walk a lot and end up walking in the street more than the sidewalk due to overgrown bushes everywhere (and snow and ice covered in the winter). I’ve called code enforcement a couple times but it doesn’t seem to accomplish much. I live in a small town so don’t want to end up on their shit-list. > [@SmellMyWort](#): > > Whenever I’m sitting on my porch sipping on a half-tea-half-lemonade and a runner trots by, I yell out: “It’s called a sideWALK, asshole!” That drink sounds really delicious! Did you invent it? Have you given it a name? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/37 "2019-07-12T14:06:26Z")
> [@Machine\_Elf](#): > > AIUI, you’re within your rights to trim anything that hangs over on your side of the property line. IIWY, I’d get busy with a hedge trimmer, and reclaim the full width of your driveway. This, obviously. ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/38 "2019-07-12T16:11:04Z")
> [@wguy123](#): > > That drink sounds really delicious! Did you invent it? Have you given it a name? 😃 I suggest “Ace Ade”. It has a nice ring to it. ---
**Author:** ![SingleMalt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/singlemalt/32/3961_2.png) [@SingleMalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SingleMalt)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/39 "2019-07-12T16:54:08Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > I suggest “Ace Ade”. It has a nice ring to it. I thought he called it a “Sidewalk Asshole”? > [@SmellMyWort](#): > > Whenever I’m sitting on my porch sipping on a half-tea-half-lemonade and a runner trots by, I yell out: “It’s called a sideWALK, asshole!” ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2019, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902/40 "2019-07-12T16:58:53Z")
> [@Guest-starring\_Id](#): > > **AHunter3** : Good to hear you (well, _had_ to) finally took things into your own hands. Just because you never planted the shit there in the first place isn’t really much of a mitigating consideration, kinda, right? Yeah, I have no excuse for being a lawnslob. Some of the previous notices from the Lawn Police have pissed me off (like citing us for leaves in our yard, or claiming our flower stalks were “grass” and citing us for grass \> max height) but they had an entirely legitimate point about the sidewalk. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-have-a-sidewalk-and-old-bushes-youre-probably-an-idiot/836902.md?page=3)