# If you regularly masturbate your K9 police dog you'll have greater control of it - Any validity? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [October 28, 2009, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421 "2009-10-28T11:25:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421/21 "2009-10-28T20:02:13Z")
All I know is that if someone came around to my cube every day to give me a handjob, I’d do what the hell he asked me to. Wait. I think that came out wrong. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421/22 "2009-10-28T20:03:41Z")
> [@Khadaji](#): > > James Herbert tells a funny story about using an artificial vagina on a bull. You were supposed to fill it with warm water to help make it feel more real, but they made the water too hot and apparently the bull was not amused. I remember that scene from the books. One of the more memorable moments. James **Herriott** , btw ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421/23 "2009-10-28T20:10:16Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > I remember that scene from the books. One of the more memorable moments. > > James **Herriott** , btw 😃 Thank you for the correction. Man, it sucks getting old! There was a day when I wouldn’t have done that. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421/24 "2009-10-28T20:11:34Z")
> [@Jack\_Batty](#): > > All I know is that if someone came around to my cube every day to give me a handjob, I’d do what the hell he asked me to. > > Wait. I think that came out wrong. “Pink slip” indeedy…talk about hard economic times. ---
**Author:** ![tr0psn4j](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@tr0psn4j](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tr0psn4j)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421/25 "2009-10-28T21:07:19Z")
> [@Khadaji](#): > > Yes, a vet will do it for artificial insemination. Not just dogs, but other animals. > > James Herbert tells a funny story about using an artificial vagina on a bull. You were supposed to fill it with warm water to help make it feel more real, but they made the water too hot and apparently the bull was not amused. > > Ron White talks about his vet doing it and offering to teach him how so that he doesn’t have to bring it in - he says _no thanks, the dog follows me around too much as it is._ The entire bit was very funny. Fleshlight for bulls? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Translucent\_Daydream](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/translucent_daydream/32/16170_2.png) [@Translucent\_Daydream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Translucent_Daydream)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421/26 "2009-10-28T21:35:38Z")
Only in Virginia… ---
**Author:** ![chique](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4491bb/32.png) [@chique](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chique)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2009, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421/27 "2009-10-28T21:37:23Z")
> [@Translucent\_Daydream](#): > > Only in Virginia… Naw, this is usually a Florida story. 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-regularly-masturbate-your-k9-police-dog-youll-have-greater-control-of-it-any-validity/515421.md?page=1)