# If you rub the lamp, you get the genie!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-rub-the-lamp-you-get-the-genie/821680>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [September 21, 2018, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-rub-the-lamp-you-get-the-genie/821680 "2018-09-21T15:11:44Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\
**Post date:** [October 1, 2018, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-rub-the-lamp-you-get-the-genie/821680/41 "2018-10-01T17:12:34Z")

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I’d wish to not have to see everything, such as this thread title, as a double entendre. I don’t want to think about rubbing someone’s “lamp” and getting his “genie” to pop out.

It’s distracting and gets in the way.

(That’s what she said!)

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**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\
**Post date:** [October 1, 2018, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-rub-the-lamp-you-get-the-genie/821680/42 "2018-10-01T20:27:41Z")

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> [@Dag\_Otto](#):
>
> Granted. All the money you need is in your pocket.
> 
> In pennies.

I’m late seeing this - but my pocket doesn’t hold that many pennies (unless I’m buying something pretty cheap). The traditional form of the wish is that you reach into your pocket and pull out the money you need - can’t do that with pennies for most purchases. And I think it neatly sidesteps the traditional twist that you ask for $1 million, and get crushed under a pile of change.

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**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\
**Post date:** [October 1, 2018, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-rub-the-lamp-you-get-the-genie/821680/43 "2018-10-01T21:55:59Z")

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> [@Folacin](#):
>
> I’m late seeing this - but my pocket doesn’t hold that many pennies (unless I’m buying something pretty cheap).

Not a problem: you just keep pulling out pennies until you get to the required amount.

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**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\
**Post date:** [October 1, 2018, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-rub-the-lamp-you-get-the-genie/821680/44 "2018-10-01T21:57:14Z")

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> [@Quartz](#):
>
> Not a problem: you just keep pulling out pennies until you get to the required amount.

If it’s a jacket pocket you just have to hold that corner of jacket upside-down over the counter of anyone you want to pay. Also over the property of anyone you hate.

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**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\
**Post date:** [October 2, 2018, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-rub-the-lamp-you-get-the-genie/821680/45 "2018-10-02T00:58:30Z")

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> [@Beckdawrek](#):
>
> Harumph, my cats are not sociopaths, bastards, maybe. I never…

See Saki’s short story “Tobermory” about why you should never wish for a talking cat.

> **[Short Stories: Tobermory by Saki](http://www.eastoftheweb.com/short-stories/UBooks/Tob.shtml)**
>
> Full online text of Tobermory by Saki. Other short stories by Saki also available along with many others by classic and contemporary authors.

(Trigger warning: as this story was written over one hundred years ago, the problem is resolved by murdering the cat.)

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