# If you view this thread...

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [November 9, 2000, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492 "2000-11-09T17:52:56Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![messiah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3e96dc/32.png) [@messiah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/messiah)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/81 "2000-11-10T06:51:15Z")

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Sorry AndyGirl,  
didnt mean you, I meant literally below me. If you dont like em, then screw em, as my gran used to say.

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**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/82 "2000-11-10T07:03:40Z")

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Whiners who don’t want to take responsibility for their own stupidity. (Seeing a lot of that lately too.)

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**Author:** ![Commander\_Fortune](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Commander\_Fortune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Commander_Fortune)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/83 "2000-11-10T07:52:51Z")

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I hate the dingleberry satellite system owners who call to order service, and not knowing how to navigate the system menus to locate basic information **argue** with you about the instructions you’re providing to assist them.

Look jagoff! You’ve already said you **don’t** know how to find the information you need to place your order. Have a little fucking confidence that I, who am highly trained and paid well to provide you with this kind of assistance, know what I’m talking about! How can you sit there and say, “no, that aint how its works on my system”, when you’ve already said you don’t fucking know how it works! Asshole, this is what I do for a living. I give these instructions 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, and these menus are **universal**. Say it with me, _universal_. That means, moron, that all menus for systems are **the same**. You’re sitting on your beanbag unable to even tell me if you own an analog unit or a digital unit so shut the fuck up, listen, and “mash” the buttons I fucking tell you to “mash” because listening to you’re inane objections is making my christing ears bleed! Don’t say “That ain’t workin’” until you’ve done what I asked you to do, chickenhead. When I say turn the channel to Telstar 4 channel 4 and then press “setup” you **do** have to turn the channel to T4-4 before “setup” will pull up the necessary data. If you press “setup” on T4-7, it won’t work, that’s why I said, “change the channel”, and don’t tell me you’ve changed the damn channel when you haven’t…you think I can’t hear that you’re still on T4-7? T4-7 has voice over, T4-4 does not. If I can hear our advertising, I know you’re a lying moron, pretty simple. Your lying, unable to follow simple instructions ass, is taking my time away from other customers who aren’t STUPID, like you. I’m happy to help, but you have to be willing to **be** helped first. Argh.

Thank you **ChiefScott** , for letting me lighten up my baggage this evening.

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**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/84 "2000-11-10T14:38:06Z")

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Per Chiefs orders:  
I hate willfully ignorant people.

“I don’t know nuthin’ 'bout them computers. Can you do it for me?”

NEWSFLASH:  
NO! FUCK YOU! LEARN IT! IT’S PART OF YOUR JOB, MOTHERFUCKER!

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**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/85 "2000-11-10T17:23:16Z")

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Fine - I wish heterosexuals would get a clue, as they are soooooooooo dense sometimes.

(Happy now? :p)

Esprix

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**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/86 "2000-11-10T17:42:12Z")

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Goddamnit **all** tohellandback.

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**Author:** ![thinksnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thinksnow/32/2849_2.png) [@thinksnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thinksnow)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/87 "2000-11-10T17:57:29Z")

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[hijack]

Hey **Commander Fortune** , could you drop me an email. I have a satellite question for you. Seriously. Well, fuck it, here it is:

I have a DirecTV system, but don’t have the phone line hooked up, yet I can still get PPV. Rather than wait for a bill, which is due in a couple’a weeks, I figured I’d ask you - can the system actually tell that I’m authorizing these things? If so, how? I thought theat was the point of the phone line, to _send_ information, so without it, the system can only receive…

[/hijack]

BTW, I hate project managers that don’t tell you what the fuck you’re supposed to be doing, what the project requirements are, what data you’ll need, _where the client is located_ and also won’t spring for a rental car, so I get to run up oper 1600 miles on **my** car running between the client and my home every weekend. And I’m the first consultant to be assigned to this client. I’m the “foot in the door” that will lead to “many, many more projects and billable hours.” CLUE: if I don’t know what the fuck is going on, I can’t very well make a good impression, now can I?

Me: Uh, hi. I’m here for…the project…?  
Them: Sure, c’mon back. You have those test scripts, case and plans they said you were working on?

Fuckin’ idiots. Yeah, I love my new job.

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**Author:** ![G.B.H.Hornswoggler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c67d28/32.png) [@G.B.H.Hornswoggler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G.B.H.Hornswoggler)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/88 "2000-11-10T18:08:31Z")

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I can’t stand whiny bastards who can’t follow directions.

“Oh, the holes were too close together! Something that _wasn’t the arrow_ was pointing to Buchanan’s hole! I didn’t bother to look at the sample ballot! I’m just too fucking old and stupid to vote!”

Lemmie 'splain something: There are no do-overs in politics, grandma, because politics is part of real life. This ain’t third grade, get it? You don’t get to try again when you miss an easy free-throw.

What you get is to hit yourself on the head repeatedly for the next four years, and ask how you could have been so stupid. Hey, speaking of stupid, sure Bush is about as thick as two planks, but I think he **managed to vote for the guy he wanted to!** How stupid does that make you retired rich cretins, huh?

Putzes.

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**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/89 "2000-11-10T18:52:31Z")

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I hate the way that this election has turned people on the board whose posts I usually enjoy into mean-spirited buttheads.

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**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/90 "2000-11-10T19:44:28Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> _Originally posted by **steve17098** _
> 
> Well… personally I dont like Al fuckin Gore. the mother fucker is all for more gun control… dont u ppl realize that that fuckin faggot is tryin to take away our mother fuckin guns… Al Gore is so fuckin queer.

OK, I hate **steve17098**.

Esprix

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**Author:** ![John\_Doughboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e36b37/32.png) [@John\_Doughboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Doughboy)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/91 "2000-11-10T19:55:18Z")

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I’m so sick of that motherfucker poking me all the fucking time! That’s sexual harrassment, and I **don’t** have to take it!

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**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/92 "2000-11-10T19:55:25Z")

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This for flame is for Yi-Peng from Singapore who gave this review for the South Park Movie soundtrack on [Amazon.com](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00000J8BV/o/qid=973885562/sr=2-1/104-5290991-5771942):

> [@](#):
>
> This is a horrible CD with nothing but bad words on every track. My system of good values would never accept such trash, such twaddle, and such filth. There is a song that has the F word on every line, and worse still the female B word. If I had the chance, I would definitely NOT buy this CD at all and I would give this a zero-star rating.

My system of values does not accept your lack of humor, self-righteousness and gratuitous use of the word “twaddle”. Like Kyle’s mom, you truly are an F word female B word.

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**Author:** ![Redwing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/dfb087/32.png) [@Redwing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redwing)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/93 "2000-11-10T20:03:47Z")

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I hate all the fucks who hate people based on which of two unidentifiable figureheads they voted for. Get over it.

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**Author:** ![zwaldd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a9adbd/32.png) [@zwaldd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zwaldd)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/94 "2000-11-10T20:30:11Z")

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i hate the small group of people gathered outside my office window [but not enough to commit an illegal act]…

[Edited by Alphagene on 11-10-2000 at 05:01 PM]

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**Author:** ![ThisYearsGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@ThisYearsGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThisYearsGirl)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/95 "2000-11-10T20:57:34Z")

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I can’t fucking stand Ayn Rand.

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**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/96 "2000-11-10T21:14:15Z")

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I hate people who don’t swear enough. Fucking cocksuckers.

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**Author:** ![vix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a88e4f/32.png) [@vix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vix)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/97 "2000-11-10T21:29:39Z")

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Today I am reviving my hatred for two sisters with whom I used to work. One of them told me that she was organizing a fundraiser. I told her I would come and donate $50, but she didn’t invite me. I forgot about it until a few months later, when she asked if I could cover phones while she and her sister went out to lunch together. Her sister (in a fit of either malice or stupidity) told me that the organizing sister thought about inviting me when a bunch of her friends bailed, but then changed her mind. WTF?

Also, I hate grudges.

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**Author:** ![tevya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@tevya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tevya)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/98 "2000-11-10T21:30:38Z")

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I hate the nimrods who are supposed to be computer savy but still can’t keep their itchy click finger away from an email attachment long enough to let their 2 brain cells come to the conclusion that the attachment that they didn’t expect from the person they don’t know **may just be a fucking computer virus!**

I work in tech support and have received at least 30 virus contaminated emails today from people who should know better. Dimwits.

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**Author:** ![AuGratin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e95f7d/32.png) [@AuGratin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuGratin)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/99 "2000-11-10T21:35:27Z")

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I hate people who stop and cluster together like little knots of human cholesterol, mindlessly clogging up hallways and aisles and doorways and turning a simple walk from one place to another into some kind of fucking obstacle course. MOVE!!! Nobody can get by, you braindead, self-centered, self-absorbed, self-important, clueless assholes! And when you try to catch their attention, or say “Excuse me,” they turn that LOOK on you for daring to have the audacity to ask them to get out of the way . . .

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**Author:** ![lucie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ed8c4c/32.png) [@lucie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lucie)\
**Post date:** [November 10, 2000, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-view-this-thread/40492/100 "2000-11-10T22:06:09Z")

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I hate movies described as “wacky” and/or “zany”. It means no one could honestly call it “funny”.

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