# If you were a Guantanamo detainee, what kind of music would it take to break you? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 2, 2009, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070 "2009-11-02T17:44:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/21 "2009-11-02T20:25:40Z")
Good suggestions, all, but it’s clear that none of you have ever shopped at FAO Schwartz. ---
**Author:** ![enomaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/59ef9b/32.png) [@enomaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enomaj)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/22 "2009-11-02T20:27:50Z")
Anything that doesn’t have a good beat and isn’t easy to dance to. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/23 "2009-11-02T20:36:55Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Good suggestions, all, but it’s clear that none of you have ever shopped at FAO Schwartz. Is it still WELCOME TO OUR WORLD WELCOME TO OUR WORLD WELCOME TO OUR WORLD OF TOYS! ??? ::ear bleeds For me, it would be that improvisational jazz that has no real melody. Or those self-conscious British women pop/soul singers that are all the rage right now (Adele someone). ::shudder ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/24 "2009-11-02T20:41:08Z")
I have to admit, when I saw the story, I had a vision of Laurence Olivier’s character in “Marathon Man” slipping a pair of earphones unto an unfortunate detainee, cranking up “Highway to Hell” and saying, “Is it safe?” ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/25 "2009-11-02T20:41:54Z")
1-877-Kars 4 Kids, K A R S, Kars 4 Kids, 1-877-Kars 4 Kids, Donate your car today. ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/26 "2009-11-02T20:57:48Z")
> [@zamboniracer](#): > > Music? All it would take would be the buzzing of a dentist’s drill to get me to spill any bit of information I had. Is it safe? 🙂 ETA: D’oh! I see **Joebuck20** beat me to it. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/27 "2009-11-02T21:07:34Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Is it still You know, I have no idea. The last time I was in one was probably 1997. I shopped for what I needed, stood in line, paid for it, then went to the top of a clock tower with a high-powered rifle and killed six people. Haven’t been back since. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/28 "2009-11-02T21:21:00Z")
Forgot to mention: Christmas music. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/29 "2009-11-02T22:38:10Z")
Wow. People broke on \*Queen \*? Man, I’d be telling my evil captors to crank it up. As for what would break me… I suppose a Pat Boone + Free Jazz + Samba mixtape (and possibly techno versions thereof done by Moby. Oh yes. They’re evil captors, remember ?) would make me spill whatever beans I got. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2009, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/30 "2009-11-02T23:15:58Z")
hm, I about lost it when I got stuck on hold where Achy Breaky Heart was the music on hold. 15 minutes and I was about ready to find Texas and a tower … Though You Picked a Fine Time To Leave Me Lucille would also probably do it. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/31 "2009-11-03T00:44:34Z")
Play about hour of rap, hip-hop, or metal, and I’ll sing like Pavoratti (hope I spelled this correctly, as the library is about to close) ---
**Author:** ![Peanut\_Gallery](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/838e76/32.png) [@Peanut\_Gallery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peanut_Gallery)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/32 "2009-11-03T01:01:00Z")
Children singing. Ick. Children singing about Christmas? Can’t we just go back to the waterboarding? Years ago, I spent what could apparently be considered torturous amounts of time listening to NIN. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/33 "2009-11-03T04:10:56Z")
What’s important is that a) you don’t have any control of the volume or the length of time you are forcedd to listen to it; and b) it prevents you from sleeping. America has learned from the best, the KGB and Gestapo, who used similar techniques. I’m just busting with pride. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/34 "2009-11-03T04:20:20Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > Good suggestions, all, but it’s clear that none of you have ever shopped at FAO Schwartz. OMFG, yes. The kind of music Barney would clap his hands to. Or gangsta rap. Or hip-hop. Or some types of gospel. ---
**Author:** ![Discipline](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/82dd89/32.png) [@Discipline](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Discipline)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/35 "2009-11-03T04:34:19Z")
Christ. You people are fucking weak. Jazz and Hip Hop? Boy Bands and Top 40? I’m more impressed with the terrorists. The OP isn’t “what sort of music do you really dislike enough to make a hyperbolic post about how it’s your kryptonite?” the OP is “[what](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iClHpepBY1I) would it take to _[break](http://nickelbackblowsass.ytmnd.com/)_ you?” ---
**Author:** ![Blut\_Aus\_Nord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Blut\_Aus\_Nord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blut_Aus_Nord)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/36 "2009-11-03T04:49:25Z")
Wtf @ saying jazz? I assume those people have never heard real jazz and/or are referring to the painful elevator music plaguing the radio today. As for me, forget music, just loop some screeching car brakes over a loudspeaker at 90 decibels. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/37 "2009-11-03T04:51:53Z")
> [@Discipline](#): > > The OP isn’t “what sort of music do you really dislike enough to make a hyperbolic post about how it’s your kryptonite?” the OP is “[what](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iClHpepBY1I) would it take to _[break](http://nickelbackblowsass.ytmnd.com/)_ you?” Ugh. The goatse of music. ---
**Author:** ![BaneSidhe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c5a1d2/32.png) [@BaneSidhe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BaneSidhe)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/38 "2009-11-03T05:15:09Z")
Barry Manilow or Celine Dion. I’d crack left, right and sideways after about 10 minutes. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 5:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/39 "2009-11-03T05:26:26Z")
What what what?! Oh shit. Whatever you do, please don’t play any Grateful Dead. _Please._ Especially not Ithaca '77. No, don’t. And never ever make me listen to Dark Side through headphones. I’m begging you. And people upthread were right – jazz is inhuman. I will go kind of insane if you play _Kind of Blue_, or Og forbid anything by Brubeck … not the Morello Horror! Whatever you do, please make it quick. End it. Shoot me with your bop gun. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2009, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070/40 "2009-11-03T05:40:27Z")
[Chinese restaurant music](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=295504) - not the gentle plingy kind, but with the high-pitched female vocalists whose screeching isn’t that far off from the [typical pitch of a woman yelping in a Japanese porn film](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=532516). A little bit of repetitive [DJ Tiesto/European/New Jersey Guido/Untz Untz techno](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GoEjVF8_LYg) mixed in, and I’ll tell you about the plans of the Dearborn sleeper cell to blow up the Gateway Arch in 2011, and maybe that time in madrassa when I had to go up to the chalkboard and write down a reason why Israel must be swept out to sea, but I had a boner and everybody laughed at me. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-a-guantanamo-detainee-what-kind-of-music-would-it-take-to-break-you/516070.md?page=3)