# If you were going to buy a custom title, what would it be? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 2, 2010, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030 "2010-03-02T20:10:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/21 "2010-03-03T02:41:37Z")
“Connoisseur.” ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/22 "2010-03-03T02:46:27Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > **Acme Product Tester** or some such. Do it! Do it! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![GameHat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ed655f/32.png) [@GameHat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GameHat)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/23 "2010-03-03T02:48:15Z")
Easy, peasy, Japanesey. **Sower of Discord** ---
**Author:** ![Sir\_T-Cups](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Sir\_T-Cups](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_T-Cups)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/24 "2010-03-03T03:00:10Z")
Care for a sip? ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/25 "2010-03-03T03:33:09Z")
Not everyone has their own personal slogan. ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/26 "2010-03-03T03:50:38Z")
> [@GameHat](#): > > Easy, peasy, Japanesey. > > **Sower of Discord** That’d just tempt me to get one that said **Shower of Discord** ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/27 "2010-03-03T16:57:20Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > Acme Product Tester or some such. How about Coyote? Too obvious? ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/28 "2010-03-03T17:15:08Z")
Has anyone done “I paid for my membership and all I got was this custom title” yet? ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/29 "2010-03-03T18:28:02Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > How about Coyote? Too obvious? If I used that it would have to be; Coyote, Supergenius. Then people would expect me to be all smart and junk. ---
**Author:** ![A\_Spoonful\_of\_Awesome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@A\_Spoonful\_of\_Awesome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/A_Spoonful_of_Awesome)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/30 "2010-03-03T23:23:42Z")
I’ve got wowsers in my trousers. Or [I’m on a horse](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owGykVbfgUE) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/31 "2010-03-03T23:31:41Z")
How about, [My hair is a bird; your argument is invalid](http://media.ebaumsworld.com/picture/e5hansej/1208060712814.jpg)? ---
**Author:** ![A\_Spoonful\_of\_Awesome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@A\_Spoonful\_of\_Awesome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/A_Spoonful_of_Awesome)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2010, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/32 "2010-03-03T23:44:11Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > How about, [My hair is a bird; your argument is invalid](http://media.ebaumsworld.com/picture/e5hansej/1208060712814.jpg)? Love it 😃 Another possibility: [I have no idea what you’re talking about… so here’s a bunny with a pancake on its head.](http://humour.200ok.com.au/image_pancakebunny.html). Though it may not work without the visual representation. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2010, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/33 "2010-03-04T00:09:22Z")
I’ve been called “kay,” and “kayla,” and “kaylas” so often (not to mention “her,” and “she”), that I think some clarification might calm my nerves, so: Father of Kayla. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2010, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/34 "2010-03-04T02:13:22Z")
> [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](#): > > Has anyone done “I paid for my membership and all I got was this custom title” yet? Too long – there’s a 30-character limit. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2010, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/35 "2010-03-04T02:33:15Z")
> [@Yllaria](#): > > Although, if I had a boat, it would be the: Polysyllabic Designation\*. That might work as a title. > \*from Schlock Mercenary In the same vein, I’d probably get “Ominous Hummmmm…” ---
**Author:** ![Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f08c70/32.png) [@Crowbar\_of\_Irony\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crowbar_of_Irony_3)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2010, 10:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/36 "2010-03-04T10:40:59Z")
I would go for _Weapon of Mass Distraction_ ---
**Author:** ![Noone\_Special](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/noone_special/32/2863_2.png) [@Noone\_Special](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Noone_Special)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2010, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/37 "2010-03-04T10:58:43Z")
I’d go for some slightly longer version of my current Location tag; something like “On the road to Armageddon” or “One hour from Armageddon.” And switch my location tag to actually give, y’know, my **location**. In fact, I may end up coughing up the dough and doing that 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2010, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/38 "2010-03-04T15:06:06Z")
I wasn’t gonna, but now that my left arm is in a cast… ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2010, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/39 "2010-03-04T15:59:07Z")
Yes, but are you mugging people? Inquiring minds want to know. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [March 4, 2010, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030/40 "2010-03-04T15:59:39Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > Too long – there’s a 30-character limit. Okay, then, “…all I got was this custom title” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-going-to-buy-a-custom-title-what-would-it-be/531030.md?page=3)