# If you were sent back to 1800 and could only take one machine what would it be? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 15, 2004, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921 "2004-12-15T03:58:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/41 "2004-12-15T19:24:19Z")
> [@Tranquilis](#): > > A good machining mill. It needn’t even have to be a CNC mill. > > With that, I can (eventually) either make any of the other items mentioned, or make the tools that will make them. Or make the tools that will make the tools that will make them. And so on… > > Industrial revolution, here I come! Rule #1 - Shops not permitted. A powerful laptop with multiple hard drives detailing the result of every major event that I can put money on, a comprehensive list of gold ore deposits in North America, and a full engineering program. With the money I make from betting, I would be able to mine for gold and then build structures that had only been dreamed of. Then again, I am from Manitoba and there would be nothing but Cree and Sioux for miles. Maybe a sniper rifle with 50 cal. bullets. If I can drop something at 2000+ meters, I should have an advantage. Hunting is easier too. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/42 "2004-12-15T19:39:28Z")
A pair of shortwave radios. (One would be useless, obviously). Then I’d hire someone to take one of them to the other side of the Atlantic. Instataneous communication between the US and Europe would be of enormous value. ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/43 "2004-12-15T21:21:59Z")
> [@Greenback](#): > > Rule #1 - Shops not permitted. Good. Then I’m fully in complaince - A [machining mill](http://www.diynet.com/diy/hi_tools/article/0,2037,DIY_13936_2955947,00.html) _is_ a single machine. One. Singular. Not a shop. Not even _close_ to a shop (which would contain _many_ metal working machines in addition to the mill). Fully in compliance with rule #1. I’m a’ takin; it with me! Industrial revolution, here I come! ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/44 "2004-12-15T22:07:48Z")
> [@iampunha](#): > > I was going to say a heart defribillator, but the state of medicine in 1800 was such that it probably would take for-bloody-ever to get to a hospital… But in 1800, severe heart problems (they called it ‘apoplexy’) were a rather minor cause of mortality. The affluence (and associated diet) that is so common today was rare then. ---
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/45 "2004-12-15T22:27:48Z")
> [@Tranquilis](#): > > Good. Then I’m fully in complaince - A [machining mill](http://www.diynet.com/diy/hi_tools/article/0,2037,DIY_13936_2955947,00.html) _is_ a single machine. One. Singular. Not a shop. Not even _close_ to a shop (which would contain _many_ metal working machines in addition to the mill). Fully in compliance with rule #1. I’m a’ takin; it with me! > > Industrial revolution, here I come! Ahh crap. That’s what I get for skipping shops class to play hockey. Sorry **Tranquillis**. Is it too late to ask if I could I use your mill to help me with my buildings? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/46 "2004-12-15T22:28:52Z")
> [@Bob55](#): > > An Apache helicoptor. I’d take a helicopter as well (no surprise to people who read some of my threads), but I’d take a Black Hawk. It’s more practical than an Apache. You can haul loads in it, carry paying passengers with it, and it would be a helluva camper. > [@](#): > > I live in rural New England and I imagine roads sucked back them. I could go for a tractor but I think I will pick a 4-wheeled ATV. It would make transportation much easier than riding around on a horse and it is just plain fun. I could travel all over the place in a day and I bet I could pick up New England Puritan chicks like no tomorrow. I bet their father’s would be pissed when I pull up to the house and start revving the engine waiting for her to come out and start some fun. A heli would be so much cooler! 🆒 > [@](#): > > An Abrams tank. > > Easier to learn to operate than a helicopter. Helicopters are easy to operate. You just have to know how. 😉 > [@](#): > > You guys would crash that helicopter in short order. I wouldn’t. No, I’ve never flown a Black Hawk; but I’ve heard it said that ‘If you can fly a Robinson R-22, you can fly _anything_.’ Seriously though, larger helicotpers (I’ve heard) tend to be easier to fly than smaller ones. The aerodynamics are the same. Turbine transitions only take about 10 hours of training, and I’m sure I can figure it out in a pinch. (Yes, I have a big ego; but going from a Robbo or a Schweizer to a turbine is not the same as going from a Cessna 172 to a Boeing 747.) > [@](#): > > A seaplane. You could make mucho bucks delivering mail, carrying passengers, etc. Hell, I could give Lewis and Clark a ride back home! Since you could land on water you wouldn’t need to worry about landing strips. Helicopters are better. No need to find a flat, calm stretch of water; just a small patch of flat ground. I’ve landed in a few river beds, by the way. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/47 "2004-12-15T22:32:53Z")
> [@DanBlather](#): > > A seaplane. You could make mucho bucks delivering mail, carrying passengers, etc. Hell, I could give Lewis and Clark a ride back home! Since you could land on water you wouldn’t need to worry about landing strips. When I was driving home today I realized that I also should have picked a seaplane. I can already fly a regular small plane so that shouldn’t be too much harder although I tend to get lost a lot without the fancy navigational equipment so that would suck. I also realized that I have another problem. My house, that I am typing from now, was built in the 1750’s so it will be there when I get banished to 1800. The original family stilled lived in it at that time. I have to kick them out. I am sure that they built it for something like $250 in supplies. I need to bring my deed with me to show that I am the rightful owner and I bought it for hundreds of thousands of dollars. That should blow their mind. Some of the men were pretty ornery back them just coming out of the Revolutionary War 20 something years earlier so I might have to pick a machine gun. ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2004, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/48 "2004-12-15T22:35:32Z")
I can’t believe no one’s said it! A money… whatever they’re called… press? Then I could make money and be rich! And it wouldn’t even be counterfeiting! ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/49 "2004-12-16T04:14:27Z")
> [@Johnny L.A.](#): > > Seriously though, larger helicotpers (I’ve heard) tend to be easier to fly than smaller ones. This agrees with my experience. Given unlimited fuel and spare parts, it’s going to be tough to beat a decent helicopter. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/50 "2004-12-16T04:39:17Z")
A Hummer would be quite satisfactory. In any era–nudge nudge! Or a good water purifier. ---
**Author:** ![Magiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4491bb/32.png) [@Magiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magiver)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/51 "2004-12-16T05:43:04Z")
An ice maker. I’d bribe the person with the CNC machine with cold lemonade to have all the other stuff made. ---
**Author:** ![Farmwoman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8dc957/32.png) [@Farmwoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmwoman)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/52 "2004-12-16T13:29:44Z")
A screen weaver. No kidding. When asked to name the technology that had the most impact on her life, a 102 year old woman from my neighborhood said, “Easy, window screens.” ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2004, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/53 "2004-12-16T14:22:00Z")
> [@Greenback](#): > > Ahh crap. That’s what I get for skipping shops class to play hockey. > > Sorry **Tranquillis**. Is it too late to ask if I could I use your mill to help me with my buildings? Not too late at all. Whatcha got to trade…? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Bob55](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Bob55](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bob55)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2004, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/54 "2004-12-17T06:01:34Z")
> [@F. U. Shakespeare](#): > > For me it would be a tossup between a solar-powered calculator and a good resophonic guitar. Neither one would make me a king, but I could probably make a decent living with either. A calculator was my second choice after the Apache. I had a friend who used to say “if I took this TI-82 back to the Middle Ages I could rule the world!”. I was never sure exactly what he meant, I think by using it to calculate the trajectory of cannon balls or something. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2004, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/55 "2004-12-17T14:51:01Z")
> [@Bob55](#): > > A calculator was my second choice after the Apache. I had a friend who used to say “if I took this TI-82 back to the Middle Ages I could rule the world!”. I was never sure exactly what he meant, I think by using it to calculate the trajectory of cannon balls or something. I read a short story one, I think it was in _Omni_ magazine, about a guy who took a very special calculator back in time to give to Isaac Newton. The story was written in the early-'80s, so it wasn’t a computer; but it was a very powerful scientific calculator. It was powered by a small nuclear power module that would explode after six months. This would allow Newton to use it without running out of power, for a sufficient time to make even more incredible advances than he made historically and would ensure that no one else found the calculator after it was discarded. Brilliant plan, eh? Except the guy made a mistake. The first time he demonstrated the calculator to Newton, by doing a simple division problem with very large numbers, the result happened to be six hundred sixty-six. Newton thought he was the Devil. I don’t remember if Newton killed him, or just ran him off; but the calculator was thrown into the river. Six months later there was an explosion, which people attributed to something demonic. ---
**Author:** ![Walloon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/fbc32d/32.png) [@Walloon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walloon)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2004, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/56 "2004-12-17T15:11:12Z")
> [@CynicalGabe](#): > > A typewriter. I think anything more complex would get me burned alive as a witch, regardless that its 1800. I’m going to be a historical stickler here (and this is a thread about being a historical stickler, isn’t it?), and point out that state-sponsored persecutions of “witches” in Britain and North America ended in the early 1700s. And that witches were never burned at the stake in America; they were usually hanged. ---
**Author:** ![BoringDad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ad7895/32.png) [@BoringDad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoringDad)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2004, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/57 "2004-12-18T05:57:53Z")
The answer here is obvious. A vibrating massage chair with built in refrigerator. No one machine is going to make you the ruler of the world. (Heck, if Ewoks can take out Storm Troopers (and I have film proof that they can), then the US Army in 1800 can take out a single tank given time.) So if you are not going to rule the world, man, it’ll be nice to relax in that chair! ---
**Author:** ![Tanach](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8edcca/32.png) [@Tanach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tanach)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2004, 7:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/58 "2004-12-18T07:34:33Z")
Cash. Cold hard cash. If I am stuck there, no single item is going to make my life as simple as it is today, but with some startup capital, I could invest in emerging technologies (which I know are going to succeed), and at least live a rather luxurious lifestyle, allowing me to focus on my real plan, finding Michael J. Fox, kicking the crap out of him and taking his Delorean back to the future where I am an instant bazillionaire from all my investments. ---
**Author:** ![BoringDad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ad7895/32.png) [@BoringDad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoringDad)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2004, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/59 "2004-12-19T00:24:13Z")
> [@Tanach](#): > > Cash. Cold hard cash. If I am stuck there, no single item is going to make my life as simple as it is today, but with some startup capital, I could invest in emerging technologies (which I know are going to succeed), and at least live a rather luxurious lifestyle, allowing me to focus on my real plan, finding Michael J. Fox, kicking the crap out of him and taking his Delorean back to the future where I am an instant bazillionaire from all my investments. Interesting! I had never heard cash referred to as a machine before. Learn something new every day. But actually, cash from today wouldn’t do you much good in 1800. Unless you enjoy going to prison for forgery! Now straight gold would work. But to match the OP it would have to be oh, say, a solid gold bicycle. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2004, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921/60 "2004-12-19T00:48:37Z")
If I lived in the South in 1800? An automatic ice maker. I’d be the richest mofo on the continent in no time flat. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-sent-back-to-1800-and-could-only-take-one-machine-what-would-it-be/279921.md?page=4)