# If you were the commander of an army, how would you fight the IS? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [March 11, 2015, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744 "2015-03-11T08:24:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2015, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/41 "2015-03-13T00:04:33Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > Of course, **whoever** controls the oil is going to pump and export it. It is too valuable a resource not to exploit. You obviously haven’t been paying attention…ISIS has fired several oil fields so far, and I have no doubt that they would do the same again and again if they were pushed. Even if they did decide to keep pumping the oil, eventually, there will still be a huge disruption if ISIS spreads because, you know, folks will be doing that whole fighting thingy in the area while the issue is decided. That would mean a huge disruption AT BEST, before the new masters get their shit together and start pumping out oil again. There aren’t magic oil fairies that take the oil out of the ground and put it on ships, after all. ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2015, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/42 "2015-03-13T00:41:01Z")
> [@MorphinePoet](#): > > If you were the commander in chief of a moderately-armed army (no phantom bombers or nuclear weapons), what would your military/intelligence strategy be in fighting the IS in both Syria and Iraq? > > Bear in mind the terrain (flat, no mountains or forests), and the type of weaponry available to the IS (anti-aircraft with limited range, rifles and different types of gunnery, soviet era tanks, medium range artillery, Humvees and howitzers) and the fact that most of their targets are intertwined with civilian sites, making a carpet bombing for example a really costly option in terms of collateral damage. Also, there is a high possibility of a network of tunnels under the ground. > > So, what would you do? You have not even begun to lay put all the assets and liabilities of my command. For a start: What is the political will of my nation? What are the basing capabilities at my disposal? What’s the time line, and what must be achieved when? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2015, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/43 "2015-03-13T00:42:01Z")
> [@XT](#): > > You obviously haven’t been paying attention…ISIS has fired several oil fields so far, and I have no doubt that they would do the same again and again if they were pushed. Even if they did decide to keep pumping the oil, eventually, there will still be a huge disruption if ISIS spreads because, you know, folks will be doing that whole fighting thingy in the area while the issue is decided. That would mean a huge disruption AT BEST, before the new masters get their shit together and start pumping out oil again. There aren’t magic oil fairies that take the oil out of the ground and put it on ships, after all. How is ISIS supposed to spread? They hold some sparsely-settled territory and all their neighbors hate them and not all their neighbors are helpless. Simply containing ISIS would be a simple matter, and once contained and isolated and embargoed and blockaded it wouldn’t last long – because its ideology is justified only by expansion, and a Caliph who can’t expand it is perhaps not a true Caliph. ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2015, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/44 "2015-03-13T00:44:40Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > How is ISIS supposed to spread? They hold some sparsely-settled territory and all their neighbors hate them and not all their neighbors are helpless. Simply containing ISIS would be a simple matter, and once contained and isolated it wouldn’t last long – because its ideology is justified only by expansion, and a Caliph who can’t expand it is perhaps not a true Caliph. This post would make sense if they hadn’t been spreading before the international community started a concerted effort to oppose them. ‘Simply containing ISIS’, today, means a multi-national effort with various factions fighting them on the ground, providing support and/or using air strikes against them. Without all of that they would spread through Iraq and probably neighboring countries as well…not ALL of their neighbors (or the citizens in their neighbors countries) hate them, after all…that’s kind of why they have been as successful as they have been. ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2015, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/45 "2015-03-13T00:45:52Z")
> [@Sitnam](#): > > You have not even begun to lay put all the assets and liabilities of my command. For a start: > > What is the political will of my nation? > > What are the basing capabilities at my disposal? > > What’s the time line, and what must be achieved when? Plus, how many cards do you have, and do you have one of the choice contiguous territories like North America or Africa (I never did well with Europe or Asia)…and how good are your dice rolls? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2015, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/46 "2015-03-13T01:07:55Z")
> [@XT](#): > > This post would make sense if they hadn’t been spreading before the international community started a concerted effort to oppose them. ‘Simply containing ISIS’, today, means a multi-national effort with various factions fighting them on the ground, providing support and/or using air strikes against them. Yeah, but that’s **all** it needs, and is what it has now. The Iraqis are now starting to push them back. They’ll probably retake the whole country this year, perhaps in the next few months. American forces could perhaps do it faster, but there’s no need to do it faster. Then (unless the Iraqis cross the border after them – and Assad would give them permission, I’m sure) ISIS is left with northeastern Syria only – how long can it last then? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2015, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/47 "2015-03-13T01:28:38Z")
Get small arms, AK-47s, and vehicles (SUVs gassed up) to the people we think are our allies, and then supply them with intelligence on the people they think are their enemies when that coincides with our conclusion that those people are our enemies. Let them do everything else and know that they are going to do everything else. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2015, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/48 "2015-03-13T21:27:56Z")
[Iraqi forces have almost but still not quite taken all of Tikrit.](http://www.reuters.com/article/2015/03/13/us-mideast-iraq-idUSKBN0M91DR20150313) I guess, as the Germans learned in Stalingrad, it is very difficult to take a city if the defenders are willing to make a house-to-house ratfight of it. Which means Mosul will be an even tougher nut to crack. ---
**Author:** ![paxpax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@paxpax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paxpax)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2015, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/49 "2015-03-15T18:27:08Z")
I would defeat them the same way the British defeated Muslim forces in India. Dip all weapons in pig’s blood. I would go even further. Fill my bombers with the carcasses of pigs and drop them all over the battlefield – especially on that piece of real estate they say is where the final victory will be won. Not very politically correct, but very effective against these 7th century savages. ---
**Author:** ![Steken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Steken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steken)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2015, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/50 "2015-03-15T18:46:12Z")
About as effective as dumping cow manure over the Nazis. As in, they’d go “ewww, gross” - and then keep on firing. ---
**Author:** ![paxpax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@paxpax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paxpax)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2015, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/51 "2015-03-15T19:37:51Z")
> [@Steken](#): > > About as effective as dumping cow manure over the Nazis. > > As in, they’d go “ewww, gross” - and then keep on firing. Actually…no. The Muslim believes he will lose his eternal salvation if he dies with any piggy stuff on or in him. Hence, a very effective way to defeat them. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2015, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/52 "2015-03-15T19:42:13Z")
> [@paxpax](#): > > I would defeat them the same way the British defeated Muslim forces in India. Dip all weapons in pig’s blood. I would go even further. Fill my bombers with the carcasses of pigs and drop them all over the battlefield – especially on that piece of real estate they say is where the final victory will be won. Not very politically correct, but very effective against these 7th century savages. Snopes says [bullshit.](http://www.snopes.com/rumors/pershing.asp) ---
**Author:** ![paxpax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@paxpax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paxpax)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2015, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/53 "2015-03-15T19:52:40Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > Snopes says [bullshit.](http://www.snopes.com/rumors/pershing.asp) OK. Then drop cartoons of Mohommed all over the battlefield so they can see them and all go crazy and start shooting each other. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2015, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/54 "2015-03-15T20:03:25Z")
> [@paxpax](#): > > OK. Then drop cartoons of Mohommed all over the battlefield so they can see them and all go crazy and start shooting each other. Why would they shoot _each other_? Why am i answering such stupid questions? ---
**Author:** ![paxpax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/74df32/32.png) [@paxpax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/paxpax)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2015, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/55 "2015-03-15T20:05:05Z")
The way to make peace with most people is to stop killing them. America has been way too involved in the Middle East for far too long and has made a lot of enemies along the way. Stop killing them and maybe they might stop killing you. Also, stop buying their oil. It is their only source of real income, that is, enough income to prosecute a war. Take away their income and you take away their ability to make war. ---
**Author:** ![Steken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Steken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steken)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2015, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/56 "2015-03-15T21:09:00Z")
So you just went from “pig’s blood!” to “Muhammed cartoons!” to “meh, how about just going home?” with a side of “stop buying their oil” in a couple of hours. You’re quick, man, I’ll give you that. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2015, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/57 "2015-03-16T00:58:22Z")
> [@DinoR](#): > > Step 1 of MDMP - Receive the Mission > My civilian leadership, in the form of Morphinepoet, gave me pretty unclear guidance while hinting at huge possibilities like international agreements to operate across national boundaries (or willingness to ignore them). It’s vague but I can get my staff planning. > > Step 2: Mission Analysis > Gather my staff, issue my understanding of the civilian leadership’s mission and intent to be used for planning purposes, staff priorities of work, and include some guidance on information on want presented in the MA brief (since things are so weak from higher). > > Bugger off with my Sergeant Major to conduct battlefield circulation. See how things stand with key subordinates who are currently engaged in defensive operations to assess their readiness, morale, and capability. Let the chief of staff chain my planners to the planning slave ship oars. We don’t abbreviate this planning process on this one. > > Not sexy but it’s the professional route ahead. BO-RING! Where’s the pig blood? The nukes? The rah-rah, kill 'em all and let Allah sort them out attitude that is growing on this board? ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2015, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/58 "2015-03-16T01:21:54Z")
> [@Steken](#): > > So you just went from “pig’s blood!” to “Muhammed cartoons!” to “meh, how about just going home?” with a side of “stop buying their oil” in a couple of hours. You’re quick, man, I’ll give you that. By morning, he may be welcoming our new overlords. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2015, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/59 "2015-03-16T02:21:04Z")
> [@paxpax](#): > > Also, stop buying their oil. You know we can’t do that. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2015, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744/60 "2015-03-16T02:22:21Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > BO-RING! Where’s the pig blood? The nukes? The rah-rah, kill 'em all and let Allah sort them out attitude that is growing on this board? If we were to put a nuclear warhead inside a shell full of pig’s blood . . . [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-were-the-commander-of-an-army-how-would-you-fight-the-is/714744.md?page=4)