# If You Won $25 Million, What Crazy Ass Stunt Would you Pull? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 16, 2007, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156 "2007-01-16T04:11:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/41 "2007-01-17T02:45:15Z")
> [@](#): > > It’s been done. Oh **Otto**. You have truly made my day. _tears of laughter_ ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/42 "2007-01-17T02:55:59Z")
Buy the naming rights to the Big Corporation Stadium. Rename it Veteran’s Field. Tell everyone I did it to shame the city. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/43 "2007-01-17T03:20:03Z")
[QUOTE=DeVena] Call the fire department and ask them if they’re busy. Call the Bank and pay off the mortgage and call and cancel the homeowners insurance. Pass out marshmallows and hot dogs to the neighbors. Then move DeHusband and DeMenagerie out and burn that lousy, broken-foundationed house to the ground. It’d be \*so \* beautiful! [/QUOTE] This happens. I know someone who has been a volunteer firefighter near Bancroft, Ontario, and every now and then the fire department will get a call. Someone has bought a property with a semi-derelict wooden house, and they intend to destroy it and build anew. So they remove anything salvageable and then invite the fire department for training and a barbecue. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/44 "2007-01-17T06:30:44Z")
[QUOTE=groman] flashmob a whole bunch of grocery stores subtly attaching new almost-but-not-the-same labels to all of their bottles of horseradish of different brands (printing appropriate labels for each brand of course) boasting various %'s of horsemeat. Pick one brand to have a label loudly proclaim “Now with 50% more horse!” :dubious: I’m tired, and need coffee, what do you expect? [/QUOTE] That is genius, and you don’t even need nearly $25 M to do it. I’m already opening up Photoshop… ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/45 "2007-01-17T06:37:54Z")
[QUOTE=Cisco] What happened last week? [/QUOTE] I believe the price of certain produce is on the up & up, according to a news bit I saw recently. At least in California. ---
**Author:** ![aclubs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@aclubs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aclubs)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 8:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/46 "2007-01-17T08:17:38Z")
> [@Captain\_C](#): > > In honor of the great Phillip Farnsworth, I’d buy 25,000,000 cups of coffee, and never sleep again. That episode was actually on [as] tonight. Creepy. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2007, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/47 "2007-01-17T18:18:05Z")
[QUOTE=Annie-Xmas] The best thing about winning would be the call I’d make to my office: Hello, Boss. Did you hear about the $25 million lottery. Yeah, there was one winning ticket. _Mines_. That would be the last they wouild ever hear from me (though I think it would be fun to stay at work, never mention being the winner, and not redeem the ticket to the last possible day. Everyone would wonder WHY you did it that way). [/QUOTE] I have a similar dream. In mine the conversation goes like this… Me: I’m not coming in today. Supervisor: Are you sick? Me: No, I’m calling in wealthy. ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2007, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/48 "2007-01-18T01:43:40Z")
It has always been a dream of mine to find the current addresses of girls who wouldn’t give me the time of day in high school or in my 20s and repeatedly drive past their houses, waving from my new red Lamborghini. But I just thought of an even better dream. I would locate their of-legal-age daughters, if such exist, and ask “Who wants to ride in my new red Lamborghini?” and _then_ wave at the moms when I drop the daughters off. 😉 😉 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Stuffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f17d59/32.png) [@Stuffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stuffy)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2007, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/49 "2007-01-18T05:15:28Z")
I’d buy a superbowl ad. Fade in to me on one of those soap boxes; I pull out my list. **" The following is a list of people who can kiss my black ass"** … The only question would be if I needed more than one ad. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2007, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/50 "2007-01-18T13:34:54Z")
[QUOTE=Stuffy] I’d buy a superbowl ad. Fade in to me on one of those soap boxes; I pull out my list. **" The following is a list of people who can kiss my black ass"** … [/QUOTE] What background music would you select? ---
**Author:** ![audiobottle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@audiobottle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audiobottle)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2007, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/51 "2007-01-18T14:53:50Z")
[QUOTE=Rigamarole] I believe the price of certain produce is on the up & up, according to a news bit I saw recently. At least in California. [/QUOTE] Just to clarify, the cold weather in California has killed off a large percentage of the crops. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2007, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/52 "2007-01-18T16:37:05Z")
[QUOTE=Jackmannii] What background music would you select? [/QUOTE] What about that guy who sings those Budweiser commercials? \*\*The following is a list of people who can kiss my black ass . . . \*\* _Thefollowingisalistofpeoplewhocankissmyblackass_ **Joe Smith** _Camaro-driving douche-bag_ **Dan Wilson** _Get a haircut!_ **Suzy Jenkins** _Thanks for the crabs!_ ---
**Author:** ![Mouse\_Maven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@Mouse\_Maven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mouse_Maven)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2007, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/53 "2007-01-18T18:06:58Z")
My dream: Unpublished Research Institute. An online peer-reviewed journal. Is your field not “cutting edge”? Did your research prove something that was excepted as fact without anyone investigating it? Need to discuss mundane things like animal strain quirks and good equipment? Come to the URI! There will be an annual meeting: Science Complaints, Research Worries, and Drinks. It will be abbreviated: URSCRWD ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2007, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/54 "2007-01-23T16:55:02Z")
[QUOTE=Phase42] and _then_ wave at the moms when I drop the daughters off… [/QUOTE] …three days later. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Slypork](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9fc29f/32.png) [@Slypork](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slypork)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2007, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/55 "2007-01-23T18:49:45Z")
I’d follow up **Sunspace’s** idea by building a flying saucer and hover it over those places. Break into the local TV/radio signals and send a message threatening the destruction of the planet if they didn’t shape up. Another idea would be to buy a couple nukes off the black market. Send a message to every world leader that I actually have ten of them hidden in major cities around the world but I won’t say which countries they are hidden in. If the world leaders don’t stop fighting, clean up the environment, and make the world a better place I will set off one of the bombs. Then, so they don’t think I’m bluffing I’d set of one on a deserted island. Every country would wonder if they have one and would be scared shitless. Or how about renting Disneyworld for the day and only let in members of diametrically opposed groups (Klan vs. Nation of Islam, Westboro Baptist Church vs. ACT-UP, extremist arms of pro-life vs. extremist arms of pro-choice, etc.) They would all be wearing t-shirts with the name of their organizations. I would time each groups arrival so they would not see the other groups come in. Then I would sit back in the control booth and watch the confrontations on the security cameras. OK, I’m cruel and nasty with a sick sense of humor. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2007, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/56 "2007-01-23T19:02:16Z")
[QUOTE=Eve] Oooooh–I’d get all the silent movies in vaults all over the world restored, musically scored and released on DVD! There’s thousands of them we’ll never see because not enough people will buy the DVDs to make it pay off. [/QUOTE] I think this is a laudable and worthy goal, **Eve**. However, if _I_ were to do it, I’d dub in voices using appropriate voice actors: Alvin the Chipmunk, StrongBad, Peewee Herman, teenage amine stars, Val Girls, Warner Brothers cartoon actors, people breathing helium or sulphur hexafluoride… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2007, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156/57 "2007-01-23T19:22:47Z")
[QUOTE=erie774] Or how about renting Disneyworld for the day and only let in members of diametrically opposed groups (Klan vs. Nation of Islam, Westboro Baptist Church vs. ACT-UP, extremist arms of pro-life vs. extremist arms of pro-choice, etc.) They would all be wearing t-shirts with the name of their organizations. I would time each groups arrival so they would not see the other groups come in. Then I would sit back in the control booth and watch the confrontations on the security cameras. [/QUOTE] Heh heh heh! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-you-won-25-million-what-crazy-ass-stunt-would-you-pull/388156.md?page=2)