# If your dog(s) wore clothes, what would they wear? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 6, 2013, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186 "2013-09-06T16:39:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/1 "2013-09-06T16:39:17Z")
I thought of this during my discussion of harnesses in the IMHO forum. If your dog(s) wore people clothes, what would their style be like? What style would express their personalities? Dapper- conservative- ultra feminine- frontier schoolmarm- Olympic athlete- toddler- C&W star- hooker- Wall Street CEO- street person- you get the idea. Here’s Mr. B in his [walking harness.](http://i851.photobucket.com/albums/ab72/EveOz/DapperMrB_zpsb1e990d9.jpg) He’s lying on the floor and I took this with my phone, thus the weird angle. He is so dapper that if he were a man, he’d wear a red bow tie and a corduroy jacket with elbow patches. Prolly smoke a pipe, too. [Here are both dogs. (Before Mr. B got a haircut.)](http://i851.photobucket.com/albums/ab72/EveOz/SweetieampBuddy_w_zpsc365639f.jpg) My other dog, Sweetie, would wear holey jeans with frayed bottoms and a too-big t-shirt with some sort of My Little Pony peace emblem on it. In pink. Fluorescent pink. She would never set down her cell phone. Pictures welcome (in their birthday suits, of course). ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/2 "2013-09-06T17:20:27Z")
Houndstooth mostly ---
**Author:** ![romansperson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/romansperson/32/17100_2.png) [@romansperson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/romansperson)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/3 "2013-09-06T19:06:09Z")
As little as possible. ---
**Author:** ![JerrySTL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e274bd/32.png) [@JerrySTL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JerrySTL)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/4 "2013-09-06T20:14:01Z")
A lab coat of course. ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/5 "2013-09-06T20:25:52Z")
[He’d wear sweats and a tshirt.](http://s12.photobucket.com/user/Missy2U_/media/1014112314_zpsdb28df30.jpg.html?sort=3&o=1#/user/Missy2U_/media/1014112314_zpsdb28df30.jpg.html?sort=3&o=1&_suid=137849905245706698227877790879) That’s the baby. And that’s a queen sized bed just for context. Yes - he’s somewhat - er - large. ---
**Author:** ![Cheez\_Whia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d26b3c/32.png) [@Cheez\_Whia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheez_Whia)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/6 "2013-09-06T21:02:46Z")
I have Basset Hounds, so it would be rumpled pajamas that are too long in the leg. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/7 "2013-09-06T23:10:35Z")
Just her collar and tags, those are the “must haves”. If I take those off, her world isn’t right until she gets them back! ---
**Author:** ![TheChileanBlob](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thechileanblob/32/435_2.png) [@TheChileanBlob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheChileanBlob)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2013, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/8 "2013-09-06T23:18:54Z")
My dog is really freaked out and paranoid, so she’d wear some kind of crazy-lady getup with mismatched bedroom slippers and a tinfoil beanie. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/9 "2013-09-07T03:23:09Z")
My dog is one of those sporty but cute girls, so she’d be wearing old jeans and an Indians tee-shirt but making it look totally hot, unlike me who makes it look totally frumpy. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/10 "2013-09-07T04:10:40Z")
Doxie in Levis, Dixie in Spandex ---
**Author:** ![Accidental\_Martyr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ce7236/32.png) [@Accidental\_Martyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Accidental_Martyr)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/11 "2013-09-07T04:48:58Z")
Kilgore would probably just wear jeans and a University of Alabama t-shirt. ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/12 "2013-09-07T05:17:19Z")
> [@TheChileanBlob](#): > > My dog is really freaked out and paranoid, so she’d wear some kind of crazy-lady getup with mismatched bedroom slippers and a tinfoil beanie. I have one like this, except he’d need a crazy-man get up. [Georgie, the neurotic one.](http://i124.photobucket.com/albums/p4/rhiannon8404/IMG_0620.jpg) In this picture he’s worried about the video game **Suburban Plankton** is playing. My other dog is a total frat boy. [Sonny, the go wild and crazy (then totally crash) one.](http://s124.photobucket.com/user/rhiannon8404/media/goofysonny.jpg.html) So he’d wear whatever frat boys wear these days. ---
**Author:** ![SurrenderDorothy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/surrenderdorothy/32/1221_2.png) [@SurrenderDorothy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SurrenderDorothy)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/13 "2013-09-07T05:35:59Z")
I confess to actually putting clothes on [my dog](http://i39.tinypic.com/2nl78mg.jpg). We get a lot of them donated and he tolerates them, so he gets to wear sweaters and little coats in the winter. I promise I don’t put him in tuxedos or stuff him into doll clothes and make him ride in a baby carriage or anything. And he actually still loves me even though I’m trying to come up with a halloween costume for him this year. Anyway, he’d be a shirt-and-tie guy. Sweater vests on cooler days. Socks with his sandals. Lots of khakis. eta: I just realized how crazy that picture makes me look- that was done for free by a photographer at Petco. Things were slow, so she was taking pictures of the foster dogs (of which he is one). She had a basket of props with her and I was just playing with them. It’s not like I took him with his collection of superhero costumes to Olan Mills and shelled out a bunch of money for him to get his picture taken. I love my dogs, but not quite that much. ---
**Author:** ![Palo\_Verde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/65b543/32.png) [@Palo\_Verde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Palo_Verde)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/14 "2013-09-07T05:37:30Z")
Cricket would wear whatever would get her the most attention. She loves to be noticed and really loves to lick people, so she’d probably wear a tight mini dress and thigh-high boots. What a floosie! Dixie on the other hand would wear a demure, lady-like dress and sensible shoes. She’s calm, mature and polite. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/15 "2013-09-07T16:22:19Z")
> [@SurrenderDorothy](#): > > I confess to actually putting clothes on [my dog](http://i39.tinypic.com/2nl78mg.jpg). We get a lot of them donated and he tolerates them, so he gets to wear sweaters and little coats in the winter. I promise I don’t put him in tuxedos or stuff him into doll clothes and make him ride in a baby carriage or anything. And he actually still loves me even though I’m trying to come up with a halloween costume for him this year. > > Anyway, he’d be a shirt-and-tie guy. Sweater vests on cooler days. Socks with his sandals. Lots of khakis. > > eta: I just realized how crazy that picture makes me look- that was done for free by a photographer at Petco. Things were slow, so she was taking pictures of the foster dogs (of which he is one). She had a basket of props with her and I was just playing with them. It’s not like I took him with his collection of superhero costumes to Olan Mills and shelled out a bunch of money for him to get his picture taken. I love my dogs, but not quite that much. I like the way you got your cover story in within the five-minute edit window. 😉 'Fess up now… you actually have a trunk full of doggie superhero costumes, right? BTW, your dog is not only photogenic, but appears to love having his picture taken. Maybe you need to get a portfolio together and send it around to some doggie modeling agencies. Time he started pulling his weight in the household, don’tcha think? When you decide on the Halloween costume, how about a picture? ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/16 "2013-09-07T18:19:25Z")
Nathan the dachshund would probably wear something simple, on the order of jeans and a t-shirt. ---
**Author:** ![GaryM](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garym/32/241_2.png) [@GaryM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaryM)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/17 "2013-09-07T18:43:38Z")
I think Snowy [http://i210.photobucket.com/albums/bb256/GaryM\_photo/Snowy/photo.jpg](http://i210.photobucket.com/albums/bb256/GaryM_photo/Snowy/photo.jpg) would look best in a Tuxedo, but with a red bow tie. ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/18 "2013-09-07T19:07:16Z")
My wife’s dog would wear a three-piece suit; mine would wear baggy shorts and a hat on backwards. ---
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/19 "2013-09-07T19:13:41Z")
Loki, my male chihuahua, likes wearing his pretty pink dresses. ---
**Author:** ![Hockey\_Monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a183cd/32.png) [@Hockey\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hockey_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2013, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186/20 "2013-09-07T22:42:14Z")
What do evil geniuses wear these days? That’s what Tasha the WonderWeenie would wear. Or a dominatrix outfit. She cracks the whip for her food and potty breaks. I feel like a servant sometimes. Serge would wear a loud Hawaiian shirt and cut-off shorts. He’s a laid back collie dude. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-your-dog-s-wore-clothes-what-would-they-wear/668186.md?page=2)