# " If You're Gonna Ride My Ass... " **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 15, 2017, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502 "2017-04-15T14:33:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/41 "2017-04-17T16:45:33Z")
> [@HeXen](#): > > I’m the type of person that doesn’t react at all to other drivers bad behaviors. You can squirt me with wiper fluid, my rainX will help me see cause I’m not flipping my wipers on. How is that their bad behavior? It’s done because you are riding their ass. Do you not consider not tailgating? ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/42 "2017-04-17T16:46:45Z")
> [@ekedolphin](#): > > My favorite from the first page of the CafePress page is, “Please don’t ride my ass. I prefer missionary position.” > > I saw a funny bumper sticker the other day, totally clean, that said, “You just wasted five seconds.” I had “Honk if you love peace and quiet.” ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/43 "2017-04-17T17:45:09Z")
> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#): > > I’m wondering about the company that would make and sell such a bumper sticker.:dubious: That one’s easy: they’re in it for the money. > [@QuickSilver](#): > > I imagine it’s the same type of company that sells scrotums for hanging on a trailer hitch. IANAD, but I believe the plural is scrota. If you’re in the market, ask around for [truck nuts.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Truck_nuts) As for the OP…there are any number of vulgar bumper stickers out there, with plenty of examples being displayed on actual bumpers. If you want something completely innocuous, [XKCD’s your huckleberry.](https://store.xkcd.com/products/opinions-bumper-sticker) ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/44 "2017-04-17T19:02:19Z")
I loved my **Stupid people shouldn’t breed** bumper sticker. There were people who laughed, and there were those who stared with a puzzled frown, then just walked off with their kids trailing. Oh, and no mention of **Bend over, I’ll drive**? ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/45 "2017-04-17T20:13:08Z")
> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#): > > I’m wondering about the company that would make and sell such a bumper sticker.:dubious: Obviously some Heathen who doesn’t believe in our Good Lord and Saviour Jesse Christ. > [@running\_coach](#): > > And that’s an excuse for tailgating? “Anyone who doesn’t do what I want them to do when I want them to do it deserves punishment.” -The Tailgaters Bible: Guinness 1:1. > [@Chefguy](#): > > I don’t understand the humor. Seriously, why is it funny? Is pulling someone’s hair while having sex a thing? It’s not funny. And no one in the history of forever has ever pulled anyone elses anything during sex. ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2017, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/46 "2017-04-17T20:39:25Z")
I saw a pick-up last week that had in 6" letters across the rear window; “FUCK ISIS” The only thing I could think is “Wow, that fat old dude really hates ISIS” and be happy that my 6 year old wasn’t in the car for me to have to explain some people’s complete lack of subtlety or tact. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/47 "2017-04-18T10:57:51Z")
> [@August\_West](#): > > I saw a pick-up last week that had in 6" letters across the rear window; “FUCK ISIS” I once saw **FUCK THE HATERS** in huge, white, fancy italic letters, across the rear window of an old car. Got a picture of it. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 11:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/48 "2017-04-18T11:34:43Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > Fortunately they’re still young enough that they think sex is a weird icky grown up thing. 😉 It’s not? ---
**Author:** ![naita](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/naita/32/5862_2.png) [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/49 "2017-04-18T11:50:30Z")
It’s funny. I don’t like putting any bumper stickers on my car, but I certainly wouldn’t find it weird if I saw that on some other vehicle. ---
**Author:** ![SigMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@SigMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SigMan)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/50 "2017-04-18T12:03:11Z")
> [@ekedolphin](#): > > My favorite from the first page of the CafePress page is, “Please don’t ride my ass. I prefer missionary position.” > > I saw a funny bumper sticker the other day, totally clean, that said, “You just wasted five seconds.” You just wasted five seconds Slow learners; ten seconds 😃 I remember the bumper sticker of the 70s: A friend with weed is a friend indeed ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/51 "2017-04-18T14:58:21Z")
> [@SigMan](#): > > I remember the bumper sticker of the 70s: > > A friend with weed is a friend indeed Friends help you move Real friends help you move bodies My pug can beat up your honor student ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/52 "2017-04-18T15:38:29Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Friends help you move > Real friends help you move bodies Best friends help you make the dead bodies real friends help you move. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/53 "2017-04-18T16:01:14Z")
Saw a “What would Jack Daniels do?” once. I also like 'Lord save me from Your followers". Saw both of those a few times while living in the Midwest. Years ago in USAF I was temporarily assigned to a base in Florida. I saw these cryptic bumper stickers that said “❤NY? →I-95N” . I didn’t really understand it then. Now that I live in FL full time I really, \*really \*get the joke. The OP’s sticker seems pretty funny to me, albeit not child-safe. I suspect a few folks here don’t get the full joke. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/54 "2017-04-18T16:25:35Z")
> [@August\_West](#): > > I saw a pick-up last week that had in 6" letters across the rear window; “FUCK ISIS” > > The only thing I could think is “Wow, that fat old dude really hates ISIS” and be happy that my 6 year old wasn’t in the car for me to have to explain some people’s complete lack of subtlety or tact. A few months back I was at Walgreens with my 10 year old daughter, behind [this](http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f44/JoeyJoeyPP/fo_zps8q0defdh.jpg). She’s at that age where I don’t mind if she’s exposed to something here and there and, honestly, if I’m watching a TV show or listening to a song with swear words, she won’t even notice them. But that was pretty blatant. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2017, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/55 "2017-04-19T19:45:21Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > The OP’s sticker seems pretty funny to me, albeit not child-safe. I suspect a few folks here don’t get the full joke. OK, what is the full joke? ---
**Author:** ![gaffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@gaffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gaffa)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2017, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502/56 "2017-04-19T20:11:43Z")
> [@2Bits](#): > > " …at least pull my hair!" > > What sort of person would put that bumper sticker on their car? > > Seriously. [Kate McKinnon?](https://youtu.be/3aMs9KqCU5g?t=495) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-youre-gonna-ride-my-ass/784502.md?page=2)