# "I'll have to explain it to my children!" Acceptable Justification? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [June 5, 2008, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909 "2008-06-05T17:31:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 8\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![jkusters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/fbc32d/32.png) [@jkusters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jkusters)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2008, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909/81 "2008-06-10T02:20:10Z")
[QUOTE=Clothahump] Young children are not ready or really capable of understanding deviant sexual behavior. As a parent, I would not want to have to explain that to my kid until they were old enough to comprehend it. [/QUOTE] Is this extended to just “deviant sexual behavior” (an oddly worded phrase considering it probably wasn’t deviant to the lesbians), or does it apply to other realms of human behavior? Can it be used to justify censuring other practices? If I’m a Buddhist and don’t want to explain obligatory Christian prayers at the beginning of city council meetings, is it justifiable to demand they cease so I don’t have to explain it to the children? If my family finds it immoral to eat the flesh of animals, is it justifiably acceptable to demand that restaurants refrain from serving patrons meat because I’d have to explain it to the children? Help me understand where this line lies and where I’d be able to invoke that justification (were I to actually have kids), please. ---
**Author:** ![Indistinguishable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/90ced4/32.png) [@Indistinguishable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indistinguishable)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2008, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909/82 "2008-06-10T02:30:49Z")
[QUOTE=Clothahump] Young children are not ready or really capable of understanding deviant sexual behavior. As a parent, I would not want to have to explain that to my kid until they were old enough to comprehend it. [/QUOTE] Not that the pile-on you’re going to get needs my trite contribution, but I would imagine children have no greater difficulty understanding “Sometimes two men or two women enjoy kissing each other, as part of their love for each other” than they have understanding “Sometimes a man and a woman enjoy kissing each other, as part of their love for each other”. If, on the other hand, you are taking the absurd step (and I would ordinarily assume you’re not, but since what you’ve said is odd to begin with, it’s hard to say) of saying young children are not ready or really capable of understanding “Sometimes two men or two women enjoy engaging in sexual intercourse, even despite the lack of intrinsic procreative potential, and this sexual enjoyment is in fact related to and in a sense underlying or driving such behavior as two men/women kissing each other”, well, it’s hardly as though you’d object to heterosexual kissing on the grounds that young children are not ready to hear about heterosexual sex. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2008, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909/83 "2008-06-10T07:13:00Z")
I wish to share something from elsewhere on the Web that I enjoyed: > [@](#): > > If you’re out with your family and you see two people of the same sex kissing, you don’t actually have to explain anal sex or fisting or the workings of a strap-on or the precise anatomical location of the prostate or what a bear is or how to put on assless chaps or what gay-for-pay means or how edible flavored lube really is or why that well at the tip of a condom has to be there or what kind of batteries go into a dildo or how many sexual positions two six-foot-tall guys can get into in the cab of a pick-up truck or why Heath Ledger was robbed of that Best Actor Oscar or what Melissa Etheridge needed David Crosby for or what poppers are or why those really flamboyant guys in the Pride parade only wear a sparkly thong or Leonid the Magnificent. > > If you’re having such a hard fucking problem understanding what to say to your kids about gay people, ask them. Ten bucks says they will look at two guys or two girls kissing, shrug, and say, “They must like each other a lot.” ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2008, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909/84 "2008-06-10T12:49:50Z")
> [@](#): > > If you’re out with your family and you see two people of the same sex kissing, you don’t actually have to explain anal sex or fisting or the workings of a strap-on or the precise anatomical location of the prostate or what a bear is or how to put on assless chaps or what gay-for-pay means or how edible flavored lube really is or why that well at the tip of a condom has to be there or what kind of batteries go into a dildo or how many sexual positions two six-foot-tall guys can get into in the cab of a pick-up truck or why Heath Ledger was robbed of that Best Actor Oscar or what Melissa Etheridge needed David Crosby for or what poppers are or why those really flamboyant guys in the Pride parade only wear a sparkly thong or Leonid the Magnificent. Shit. Guess I know why I lost my babysitting job, then. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2008, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909/85 "2008-06-10T14:12:55Z")
> [@](#): > > If you’re out with your family and you see two people of the same sex kissing, you don’t actually have to explain anal sex or fisting or the workings of a strap-on or the precise anatomical location of the prostate or what a bear is or how to put on assless chaps or what gay-for-pay means or how edible flavored lube really is or why that well at the tip of a condom has to be there or what kind of batteries go into a dildo or how many sexual positions two six-foot-tall guys can get into in the cab of a pick-up truck or why Heath Ledger was robbed of that Best Actor Oscar or what Melissa Etheridge needed David Crosby for or what poppers are or why those really flamboyant guys in the Pride parade only wear a sparkly thong or Leonid the Magnificent. Man, I nearly made it through that without googling. Then I had no idea who Leonid the Magnificent is. Where’s that “pop-culture that passed you by” thread when you need it? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2008, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909/86 "2008-06-10T16:24:50Z")
[QUOTE=Happy Scrappy Hero Pup] How is that teasing straight guys? That’s like TV. [/QUOTE] It’s teasing cause I can do it so easily, while they generally have to work for it. (you do know that I’m male and gay right?) ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2008, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909/87 "2008-06-10T17:46:19Z")
[QUOTE= Antinor01] It’s teasing cause I can do it so easily, while they generally have to work for it. (you do know that I’m male and gay right?) [/QUOTE] No. No, I did not. :smack: Got the second part right but not the first. Now I know you’re what we straight guys call a poacher. Either you share the wealth by serving as a funnel, or you buy your own damn beer when we hang out. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2008, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909/88 "2008-06-10T18:40:38Z")
It’s stupid to say “You shouldn’t do X because I don’t want to explain it to my kids”. Now, I have no problem with gays in general, and as long as their PDAs do not go outside the boundaries of tactfulness, I don’t give a damn what they do at a ball game. But let’s imagine for a moment I was anti-gay, thought it was a major sin, thought you could burn in hell for it, etc. Well, I don’t approve of cigarette smoking. My kids know I don’t approve of it. I don’t do it, my husband doesn’t do it, and no one does it inside our house. But if one of my young kids saw a person smoking in public and said to me “Mommy, if smoking is so bad, then why is that person doing it?” I would say “Well, it’s not illegal for them to do it, and they are an adult, so even though I don’t think it’s a good thing to be doing, it’s none of my business, really, and none of yours, either; that’s just good manners”. I think if I had a problem with homosexuality, that’s how I would approach the questions from the kids. That one hetero couple, OTOH, that we saw at Oregon Ridge State Park once. . ._they_ were out of line. We were at a family-oriented concert of the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra, at the park; there was a couple on a blanket in front of us, maybe in their early 20s. They were laying on one blanket and had another thin blanket covering them, but they were _humping_ each other, right there in front of everyone! I’ve no idea if they had their pants down and were actually screwing, but hey, no matter what your orientation is, at some point you should bloody well get a room. And yes, I explained that to the kids I had with me at the time; (“Mommy, what are those people doing?” “Well, honey, it looks like they’re kissing and touching each other a whole bunch in a way that’s completely not appropriate or polite in public. They shouldn’t be doing that”) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ill-have-to-explain-it-to-my-children-acceptable-justification/451909.md?page=4)