# Illogical Logic **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 16, 2001, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367 "2001-01-16T19:19:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2001, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/41 "2001-01-21T03:06:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KJ \* > \*\*We can’t have a thread without a Simpsons quote: > > Lisa: Well, if I wanted to, I could say that this rock wards off tigers! > > Homer: How so? > > Lisa: Well, do you see any tigers around? > > Homer: …Lisa, I want to buy your rock… > > Lisa: Nevermind.\*\* Actually, KJ, that episode was before the Simpsons started to suck, when Lisa still had some moxie. When Homer asked to buy the rock, first she waved him off piously, but when he held a bill out to her, she looked around furtively and whisked it into her pocket. (A bit of cartoon physics there, as well: her little lampshade dress never even shows folds or creases, but suddenly has a sewn-in pocket.) ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2001, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/42 "2001-01-21T03:08:18Z")
Oh, and Zenster, two wrongs don’t make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane. I realize that really belongs in the “bad jokes” thread, but it’s what I say whenever someone says TWDMAR. ---
**Author:** ![tubagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b77776/32.png) [@tubagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tubagirl)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2001, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/43 "2001-01-21T04:48:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by BornDodgy \* > \*\*As my math teachers used to say… > > if 4 people go into an empty room, 5 come out and one more person goes in… the room is empty. \*\* How the hell did my Algebra teacher get to Europe to teach you? ---
**Author:** ![KP235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de0a6/32.png) [@KP235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KP235)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2001, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/44 "2001-01-21T08:27:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rilchiam \* > **two wrongs don’t make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.** I usually use “two wrongs don’t make a right, but three lefts do”, but I kinda like yours better, less time explaining the whole ‘three lefts’ thing. ---
**Author:** ![BornDodgy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@BornDodgy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BornDodgy)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2001, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/45 "2001-01-21T10:52:01Z")
Two rights might make a wrong… or two wrongs make one right… but only if they dont use protection… ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2001, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/46 "2001-01-22T07:27:42Z")
The more you study, the more you learn. The more you learn, the more you know. The more you know, the more you can forget. The more you can forget, the more you do forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So… why study? ---
**Author:** ![kristoph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7cd45c/32.png) [@kristoph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kristoph)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2001, 9:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/47 "2001-01-22T09:11:43Z")
basically I stydt to discover how much there is that I don’t know about, does that make sense? or just does it fit in with the illogical nature of this thread ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2001, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/48 "2001-01-22T13:03:26Z")
Apples are red. Apples are good to eat. Fire engines are red. Therefore, fire engines are good to eat. (Yes, some fire engines are yellow, but so too are some apples.) ---
**Author:** ![Tzel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Tzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzel)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2001, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/49 "2001-01-22T15:23:06Z")
All men are mortal. Socrates is mortal. Therefore, all men are Socrates. ---
**Author:** ![Erika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/47e85d/32.png) [@Erika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Erika)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2001, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/50 "2001-01-24T06:10:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by screech-owl \* > \*\*Apples are red. > Apples are good to eat. > Fire engines are red. > Therefore, fire engines are good to eat. > > (Yes, some fire engines are yellow, but so too are some apples.) \*\* Which reminds me , of course, of this: Fire engines have four men and eight wheels. Four plus eight is twelve. There are twelve inches in a foot. A foot makes a ruler. Queen Elizabeth was a ruler. The Queen Elizabeth was a ship that sailed on the sea. There are fish in the sea. Fish have fins. The Russians beat the Fins. The Russians are reds. And THAT’s why fire engines are red. [as of yet, I lack an explanation for fire engines being yellow. I’ll work on it (not that I get to claim this one).] ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2001, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/51 "2001-01-24T10:56:37Z")
Socrates was a wise man. He gave people advice. They poisoned him. ---
**Author:** ![Eohippus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b487fb/32.png) [@Eohippus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eohippus)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2001, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/52 "2001-01-24T13:01:13Z")
Re: I’m goin’ all geeky on yo asses! ## quote: Originally posted by Enderw24 a = b a2 = ba a2-b2 = ab-b2 (a+b)(a-b) = b(a-b) * * * ## Just in case the less math-inclined are wondering where the fallacy is, it’s between the step above and the step below. It requires dividing each side by (a-b), which is zero, therefore the error is in division by zero. That being said, it is a clever proof. quote: a+b=b a+a=a 2a=a ## so 2=1 Hey, shouldn’t step 4 above read, (a+b) (a-b) = 2b(a-b) ---
**Author:** ![idiotb0x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ecae2f/32.png) [@idiotb0x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/idiotb0x)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2001, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367/53 "2001-01-24T14:28:56Z")
As Paul Merton once said… I live locally…well I always have lived locally. I mean what’s the point in living miles from your house? You’d never get back at nights. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/illogical-logic/50367.md?page=2)