# I'm a Star Wars fanbody and I did not hate the Ewoks. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 5, 2007, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273 "2007-11-05T08:25:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/41 "2007-11-05T19:27:19Z")
[QUOTE=KidScruffy] Symbolism? Ok, I seriously missed something about the Ewoks. Anyone want to fill me in? [/QUOTE] Something involving Kuhn, or Kant, if I recall. It mostly dealt with Keynsian economic dynamics applied to the subplots of the minor Jane Austen characters. It got me a B+ on my Political Science paper 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Tenebras](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/977dab/32.png) [@Tenebras](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenebras)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/42 "2007-11-05T19:45:55Z")
I liked the Ewoks. I recently rewatched Jedi and I call shenanigans on the whole “Ewoks pwn Empire” story that people seem to parrot back and forth the each other. The Ewoks are basically getting their collective asses handed to them until Chewbacca turns the tide by capturing the walker. The scenes of Ewok-y triumph come after we see them totally failing to stop the stormtroopers. And they have a bunch of elaborate traps set up in the forest? Of course they do. It only doesn’t make sense if you think they set them up because the bigjobs showed up and told them to make big elaborate traps in the forest. How long have the stormtroopers had their base on Endor? It seems like they’ve been there for a while. The Ewoks could have been setting all that stuff up around their base for weeks before they finally got to use it. We saw their treetop city and it was pretty impressive, so we know that the little teddy bears can do a lot with ropes and pullys. Also, they’re kind of vicious little bastards. There’s the stripey one with the skull on his head, and they have pointy teeth. Pointy teeth! And sharp spears. My guess is if you meet an Ewok in the forest and you’re not carting a Golden God around with you (with a handy levitating Jedi to act as Grand Vizier) the first you know of them is when they eat your face off. Unless you meet Wicket. But we know that Wicket’s just a big softy, so he doesn’t count. ---
**Author:** ![Dante](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dante/32/9673_2.png) [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/43 "2007-11-05T20:01:39Z")
[QUOTE=KneadToKnow] IMHO, the chief requirement is that you have had at least one dirty dream about one of the characters and/or races. My fantastic dream in which I had an orgy with Dr. Selar, K’Ehleyr, the female Q from _Voyager_, and Tarah the Andorian should qualify me. 😛 [/QUOTE] I’ll be in the holodeck with my climbing gear. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/44 "2007-11-05T20:09:40Z")
[QUOTE=dmatsch] Ex-squeeze me, meesa be thinking they mutated into Jar-Jar. [/QUOTE] How are we ever going to sell anyone on evolution if you imply we’re going _backwards_? ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/45 "2007-11-05T20:15:52Z")
[QUOTE=Anaamika] Ah. Er. Um. I guess I _am_ a Trekkie. [/QUOTE] so, how you doin’? ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/46 "2007-11-05T20:20:51Z")
I was like 6 when ROTJ came out. I didn’t hate the Ewoks back then, I just thought they were OK. My hatred developed later when I learned they were supposed to be Wookies. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/47 "2007-11-05T20:59:31Z")
> [@](#): > > I’m a Star Wars fanbody and I did not hate the Ewoks. I agree. However, note the past tense: I didn’t hate the Ewoks. At the time, I liked them just fine. Then I turned twelve. They’re fine for the younger set, but they don’t really have the broad demographic appeal. This is in stark contrast to Jar-Jar, whom folks of all ages can hate equally. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/48 "2007-11-05T21:29:50Z")
Personally I’m indifferent to the Ewoks, I enjoy ROTJ as much as the next person. However I really liked the Ewoks cartoon that aired when I was younger - beecha wowa! ---
**Author:** ![Greg\_Charles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/839c29/32.png) [@Greg\_Charles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greg_Charles)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/49 "2007-11-05T22:06:46Z")
[QUOTE=FordPrefect] You probably wouldn’t believe what I would do for a few paltry hundred million dollars. [/QUOTE] Does it have anything to do with “joyless fucks” mentioned in the OP? [QUOTE=Tenebras] My guess is if you meet an Ewok in the forest and you’re not carting a Golden God around with you (with a handy levitating Jedi to act as Grand Vizier) the first you know of them is when they eat your face off. [/QUOTE] This is freakin’ hysterical. **Tenebras** , I salute you! ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/50 "2007-11-05T22:21:15Z")
[QUOTE=Malvert P. Redd] Wasn’t the one scene of the Ewok getting hit by the Scout Walker laser while his buddy pokes at him trying to wake him up traumatizing enough for you? [/QUOTE] One must have a heart of stone to watch the death of the little Ewok without laughing. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/51 "2007-11-05T22:27:13Z")
[QUOTE=KidScruffy] Symbolism? Ok, I seriously missed something about the Ewoks. Anyone want to fill me in? [/QUOTE] Little guys relatively primitive kick the ass of highly sophisticated invading army with super weapons. Sounds familiar? ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/52 "2007-11-05T22:40:47Z")
[QUOTE=dmatsch] I for one, was hoping for a planetary extinction level event from the destruction of a moon-sized body orbiting the planet, not to mention the radioactive fallout from a generator strong enough to power a shield to protect said moon-size body. I thought it trivialized the final chapter in the series. [/QUOTE] Ah, the [Endor Holocaust](http://www.theforce.net/swtc/holocaust.html) scenario. And I’m another who thinks that they were way too cutesy. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/53 "2007-11-05T22:52:52Z")
[QUOTE=Voyager] Little guys relatively primitive kick the ass of highly sophisticated invading army with super weapons. Sounds familiar? [/QUOTE] No it doesn’t - elaborate further please. ---
**Author:** ![Tenebras](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/977dab/32.png) [@Tenebras](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenebras)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/54 "2007-11-05T23:04:15Z")
[QUOTE=Illuminatiprimus] No it doesn’t - elaborate further please. [/QUOTE] Two words: Vietnam. ---
**Author:** ![Carnacki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b5e925/32.png) [@Carnacki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carnacki)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2007, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/55 "2007-11-05T23:32:43Z")
[QUOTE=Tenebras] Two words: Vietnam. [/QUOTE] There are two words in Vietnam. One of them is angry. What are the other two? Seriously though, thanks for clueing me in. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2007, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/56 "2007-11-06T00:32:18Z")
[QUOTE=KidScruffy] There are two words in Vietnam. One of them is angry. What are the other two? Seriously though, thanks for clueing me in. [/QUOTE] Sorry. I forget there are people out there who didn’t suffer through that time. It was a bit more subtle than Anakin saying “either you’re with me or against me” in the last one. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2007, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/57 "2007-11-06T00:47:56Z")
[QUOTE=Miller] I still think the Ewok battle could be salvaged by removing the ridiculous log traps, and adding in about a half-dozen additional scenes of Ewoks being absolutely slaughtered by Stormtroopers. They still win in the end, by virtue of outnumbering the Imperial by about a 1000:1, but at the end, the battle field is hip-deep in cute’n’fuzzy corpses. [/QUOTE] Meh, too obvious. I say turn the Ewoks into rabid little killers, feasting on the corpses of the Stormies and just tearing their flesh to pieces, blood spraying everywere. The symbolism, I believe, is that the Empire treated non-humans as brainless, incompetant low-lifes. Who could never possibly defeat the might Imperial Military. Well, surprise surprise, their overconfidence was their weakness. (Oh, and Wicket launched the career of Warwick Davis. We would never have heard of him had not his grandmother not read the casting call for little people when he was eleven.) ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2007, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/58 "2007-11-06T15:16:45Z")
[QUOTE=Guinastasia] I say turn the Ewoks into rabid little killers, feasting on the corpses of the Stormies and just tearing their flesh to pieces, blood spraying everywere. [/QUOTE] It’s the “Star Wars Holiday Special” meets “Woodland Critter Christmas.” ---
**Author:** ![flight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbce88/32.png) [@flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flight)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2007, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/59 "2007-11-06T17:47:53Z")
[QUOTE=Aesiron] I’m a Trekkie and only own one of the movies. On topic, I’m not a fan of _Star Wars_ at all. Saw the original three once and they were fun but that’s as far as my interest goes. [/QUOTE] I bet I know which one. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2007, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273/60 "2007-11-06T17:52:26Z")
[QUOTE=Guinastasia] Meh, too obvious. I say turn the Ewoks into rabid little killers, feasting on the corpses of the Stormies and just tearing their flesh to pieces, blood spraying everywere. [/QUOTE] What the hell. Let’s have both! Hey, at the end, was that a funeral pyre for Vader, or a barbeque? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-a-star-wars-fanbody-and-i-did-not-hate-the-ewoks/425273.md?page=4)