# I'm bored. Let's have a baby Jesus burning party.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [January 3, 2006, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257 "2006-01-03T18:52:16Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/1 "2006-01-03T18:52:16Z")
[You can’t make this stuff up](http://1010wins.com/topstories/local_story_003071044.html)
Four teens stole 27 baby Jesus statues from nativity scenes outside churches and homes and planned to burn them, police said.
Two of the suspects, who ranged from 15 to 19 years old, said they acted out of boredom, authorities said.
`They were looking for things to do,'' Detective Ken Kelly said. `They told us, ‘We were going to have a baby Jesus burning party.’’
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### Author:  [@SSG\_Schwartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSG_Schwartz)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/2 "2006-01-03T19:15:56Z")
I’m bored, what is there to do?
I dunno, what do you want to do?
Let’s gather Baby Jesuses and set them on fire!
Yeah, that’ll be cool!!
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### Author:  [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/3 "2006-01-03T19:21:18Z")
I just wanted to comment that the title of this thread is truncated to “I’m bored. Let’s have a baby…” Imagine my disappointment. 😃
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### Author:  [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/4 "2006-01-03T19:22:31Z")
Errr…that should read “…is truncated to _on the index page_…”
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### Author:  [@Rhinocerous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhinocerous)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/5 "2006-01-03T20:29:47Z")
Awwwww . . . I came in here ready to trash on Jesus but was totally disappointed. ☹
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### Author:  [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/6 "2006-01-03T21:44:46Z")
C’mon, sing along! Wha-a-a-at a flame we have in Je-e-e-e-sus…
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### Author:  [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/7 "2006-01-03T21:56:49Z")
Baby Jesus burning parties make the Baby Jesus cry.
No wait, that’s not quite right …
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### Author:  [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/8 "2006-01-03T22:02:18Z")
Can I have a drumstick?
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### Author:  [@Corrvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corrvin)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/9 "2006-01-03T22:04:45Z")
> [@Mr Bus Guy](#):
>
> Can I have a drumstick?
{God forgive me}
I want a WING!
{/God forgive me}
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### Author:  [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/10 "2006-01-03T22:11:38Z")
I can’t tell you how relieved I am this is a link to a bizarre news story. I was was having a hard time rationalizing why a Doper who names herself \ ***Annie Xmas** \* would want to burn baby Jesuses. (Jesu?)
Baby Jesus don’t play that. He’d just turn the flames into wine or something.
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### Author:  [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2006, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/11 "2006-01-03T23:07:39Z")
Must have been quite a night at the holding cell.
“My name’s Mad Dog. I’m in here for murder, grievous assault, and rape. What’d they get you for, kid?”
“I set the baby Jesus on fire.”
“Damn, kid, that’s hardcore.”
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### Author:  [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)
#### Post date: [January 4, 2006, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/12 "2006-01-04T12:03:42Z")
> [@Ponder Stibbons](#):
>
> Baby Jesus burning parties make the Baby Jesus cry.
>
> No wait, that’s not quite right …
His tears would put out the flames!
Why baby Jesus? Why not Joseph–the king of all wankers? How about Mary–that blue cloak would burn a treat. Hell, light the whole thing on fire and do it right…\*
\*this is what’s wrong with Youth today. No follow through; no thoroughness. Sad statement on today’s hooligans, I tell you.
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### Author:  [@roshia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roshia)
#### Post date: [January 4, 2006, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/13 "2006-01-04T12:43:08Z")
_This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine…_
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### Author:  [@Wallenstein](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallenstein)
#### Post date: [January 4, 2006, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/14 "2006-01-04T12:56:39Z")
_Shine, Jesus, Shine_?
Opening lines:
\*
Lord, the light of your love is shining
In the midst of the darkness, shining\*
🙂
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### Author:  [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)
#### Post date: [January 4, 2006, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/15 "2006-01-04T14:55:01Z")
It would have burned with the brightness of 27 sons.
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### Author:  [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)
#### Post date: [January 4, 2006, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/16 "2006-01-04T15:28:44Z")
You’re all going to _hell_.
I’m going right along with you for laughing at this. 😃
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### Author:  [@Grossbottom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grossbottom)
#### Post date: [January 4, 2006, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/17 "2006-01-04T16:03:52Z")
27 baby Jesi? That’s damned impressive, Jesus is actually bolted down into the manger with steel cables. You need strength and some boltcutters to liberate a Baby Jesus from a manger scene. Ten minutes to scout the area, five minutes to sneak up on the manger scene, five to ten to get the Jesus out…not to mention all the time you spent driving around looking for a vulnerable Jesus.
27 is very respectable.
(And you need a black magic marker if you want them all to look like little Baby George Harrisons. The excesses of my misspent youth haunt me.)
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### Author:  [@SSG\_Schwartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSG_Schwartz)
#### Post date: [January 4, 2006, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/18 "2006-01-04T19:37:22Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#):
>
> Must have been quite a night at the holding cell.
>
> “My name’s Mad Dog. I’m in here for murder, grievous assault, and rape. What’d they get you for, kid?”
> “I set the baby Jesus on fire.”
> “Damn, kid, that’s hardcore.”
Johnny Cochran is already preparing for the appeal:
If the Jesuses don’t burn, You must overturn! 😃
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### Author:  [@cabdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cabdude)
#### Post date: [January 4, 2006, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/19 "2006-01-04T19:44:07Z")
I burning your baby jesus.
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### Author:  [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)
#### Post date: [January 5, 2006, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-bored-lets-have-a-baby-jesus-burning-party/338257/20 "2006-01-05T14:12:44Z")
> [@cabdude](#):
>
> I burning your baby jesus.
The rock in the xob: I burning your god!
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