# I'm dumber today than I was on Saturday **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 19, 2002, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576 "2002-08-19T11:54:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2002, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/1 "2002-08-19T11:54:09Z")
… cause today, I’m blonde! 😉 Wow! Look! People are talking down to me. I see them enunciating each monosyllabic word. How refreshing! No more of that fancy-schmancy $10-word talk when a nice nickel word is so much more … what’s the word… efficient. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2002, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/2 "2002-08-19T12:02:51Z")
**dantheman** you’re blonde now. Efficient would be too hard a word for you to think up. What you really mean is “a nice nickel word is much more…funsie!” ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2002, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/3 "2002-08-19T12:05:33Z")
OMG! Your like totaly right! ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2002, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/4 "2002-08-19T12:33:58Z")
Q: What do you call a blonde dyeing her (his) hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence. - former natural platinum blonde here, turned auburnish with age ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/5 "2002-08-21T13:43:36Z")
Well, I shocked everyone at work. The receptionist didn’t even recognize me - she asked where I thought I was going! “To my office,” I replied. 😃 My eyebrows aren’t blond, though. Any natural blondes out there? Are your eyebrows naturally blonde? ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/6 "2002-08-21T13:48:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dantheman \* > \*\*OMG! Your like totaly right! \*\* You left ot the “Fer Shure”. Gotta have the “Fer Shure”. It’s the law. ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/7 "2002-08-21T16:00:16Z")
Certainly sounds like you’re having more fun, **dan**! ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/8 "2002-08-21T16:44:51Z")
Good lord, dan. Did you get one of those Maxim haircolor jobs? Ya know, the broads in the commercials are _paid_ to crawl all over those _actors_. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/9 "2002-08-21T17:01:18Z")
Yes, I did! I was thinking I’d head over to a diner today, maybe the Silver … and see if the waitress licks my hair. She’d come over, looking down at her pad, ready to take my order, and before I could get a word out, she’d look up, eyes ablaze, heart pounding, pulse quickening, and gaze with lust-filled orbs of sweetness and light at my towhead and… and… and… ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/10 "2002-08-21T17:37:22Z")
I’m sure Doris, the fifty-year old, slightly pudgy waitress wearing the sensible shoes and oh-so-sexy hairnet would gladly lick your hair… I’m curious, by the way, how old of a fellow are you? ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-dumber-today-than-i-was-on-saturday/124576/11 "2002-08-21T17:42:28Z")
Uuuuuuugh. Thanks for that visual, **Juanita**. I so did not want that in my head. It was just a change. Been the same way for 32 years. I think now I look capable of some actual derring-do. Like I could pilot a planeload of people to safety without blinking an eye. Or muscle my way through a bulk store’s crowds on a Saturday morning without sweating. Or even post thoughtful, concise, relevant messages in **GD**. No wait, maybe not that.