# I'm getting drunk today **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 6, 2020, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942 "2020-09-06T16:20:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2020, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/21 "2020-09-07T16:13:58Z")
I woke up and decided to wake&bake. My gf scolded me, reminding me I was going to drink all day. I opened a Pabst Blue Ribbon Hard Coffee. Now I’m sweaty from some light chainsaw work (long story) so I’m having Famous Grouse Scotch (another long story) on the rocks. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/22 "2020-09-08T12:23:42Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Now I’m sweaty from some light chainsaw work (long story) Intoxication and chainsaws don’t mix very well… I just wanted to offhandedly mention that. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/23 "2020-09-08T12:30:56Z")
> [@solost](#): > > Intoxication and chainsaws don’t mix very well… While I agree in general with your statement, I always have a hit or two of cannabis in my system before touching a chainsaw. Stone cold sober I’m way too wise to operate a chainsaw. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/24 "2020-09-08T12:33:25Z")
That’s cool, I mostly said it just to make the ‘offhandedly’ joke. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/25 "2020-09-08T12:35:36Z")
OMG. Heh. ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/26 "2020-09-08T13:04:45Z")
A wise man once sang… I woke up this morning and I had myself a beer I woke up this morning and I had myself a beer The future’s uncertain And the end is always near ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/27 "2020-09-08T13:26:31Z")
> [@solost](#): > > That’s cool, I mostly said it just to make the ‘offhandedly’ joke. And a darn good thing you did. Made my morning. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/28 "2020-09-08T13:56:17Z")
> [@madsircool](#): > > A wise man once sang… > > I woke up this morning and I had myself a beer > I woke up this morning and I had myself a beer > The future’s uncertain > And the end is always near And another said, _And however much I booze, There ain’t no way out_ ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/29 "2020-09-08T14:00:06Z")
“My advice to you is to begin drinking heavily.” - _Animal House_ “To alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems!” - _The Simpsons_ ---
**Author:** ![Treppenwitz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treppenwitz/32/3445_2.png) [@Treppenwitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treppenwitz)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/30 "2020-09-08T20:50:40Z")
And Sir Henry Rawlinson [said](https://youtu.be/_-SKxKYcMMA?t=23): _If I had all the money I’d spent on drink, I’d spend it on drink._ j ---
**Author:** ![jaycat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jaycat/32/3015_2.png) [@jaycat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaycat)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2020, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/31 "2020-09-08T21:58:16Z")
> [@madsircool](#): > > A wise man once sang… > > I woke up this morning and I had myself a beer > I woke up this morning and I had myself a beer > The future’s uncertain > And the end is always near Don’t know how wise he was, but that lyric evinced a particular clairvoyance. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/32 "2020-09-11T05:09:12Z")
> [@madsircool](#): > > A wise man once sang… > > I woke up this morning and I had myself a beer > I woke up this morning and I had myself a beer > The future’s uncertain > And the end is always near Is that the guy who said, Show me the way To the next whiskey bar Oh, don’t ask why Oh, don’t ask why For if we don’t find The next whiskey bar I tell you we must die that guy? ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/33 "2020-09-11T06:48:07Z")
Yes. The man who once shelved books at Powell Library at my future university. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/34 "2020-09-11T16:30:56Z")
[![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/5tFZR6cztak/maxresdefault.jpg "The More I Drink") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tFZR6cztak) ---
**Author:** ![Acierocolotl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acierocolotl/32/6241_2.png) [@Acierocolotl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acierocolotl)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942/35 "2020-09-11T16:44:38Z")
Scotty may have also been referencing the fact that “green” drinks (at least the likes of beer and cider) are considered “green” if they haven’t aged. They taste appalling, frankly. They’re still just as alcoholic as a properly aged beverage and if you’ve saved them for last, you don’t care about the taste anymore anyway. So drink the tasty old stuff first, and drink the young, gross-tasting stuff last. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-getting-drunk-today/919942.md?page=1)