# I'm giving my son a rock for Christmas. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 25, 2010, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346 "2010-12-25T06:38:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/1 "2010-12-25T06:38:59Z")
Not a cool rock. A boring one from next to the driveway. I hope I’m not a bad dad. At some point my son conflated the Charlie Brown specials and thinks bad kids get a rocks instead of presents. Seeing as how he wasn’t always behaving perfectly in public during the last year (yeah, like all the other 6-year-olds were…) I’m not going to be mean about it, all the really good stuff gets opened after the rock shows up. I’m not Frank Reynolds. But there’s gonna be a rock. ---
**Author:** ![Walmarticus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Walmarticus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walmarticus)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/2 "2010-12-25T06:43:24Z")
Yawn You want to make it a holiday he’ll remember? Cat poo. ---
**Author:** ![Teufelblitz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@Teufelblitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teufelblitz)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/3 "2010-12-25T06:46:48Z")
This seems like it would be a good stocking stuffer if there are other kids around. “I got a train!” “I got a doll!” “I got a rock…” ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/4 "2010-12-25T07:00:40Z")
I hope you are prepared for tears, and a high probability of a thoroughly ruined Christmas. ☹ I really would not count on giving the real presents after as certain to make everything all better. ---
**Author:** ![kjbrasda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/74df32/32.png) [@kjbrasda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kjbrasda)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/5 "2010-12-25T07:01:51Z")
My daughter told my husband he’s getting poo-on-a-stick for Christmas. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/6 "2010-12-25T07:42:23Z")
One year, when my kid was in late single digits, I gave him and my nephew both a gift wrapped lump of charcoal. They both had about eleventy bazillion other presents besides… ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Nader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Darth\_Nader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Nader)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/7 "2010-12-25T07:42:41Z")
If a small rock ruins my son’s Xmas, **njtt** , it’s clearly not about the holiday. I’ll let you know if he still loves me this afternoon, okay? ---
**Author:** ![Audrey\_Levins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Audrey\_Levins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Audrey_Levins)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/8 "2010-12-25T08:37:39Z")
I cry just driving by rocks on the side of the road. Rocks make everyone cry, right? They ruin not just Christmas, but every other day of the year for me. Am I alone? ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 8:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/9 "2010-12-25T08:54:06Z")
> [@Audrey\_Levins](#): > > I cry just driving by rocks on the side of the road. Rocks make everyone cry, right? They ruin not just Christmas, but every other day of the year for me. > > Am I alone? Rocks make you cry? Why? ---
**Author:** ![cerberus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@cerberus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cerberus)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 9:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/10 "2010-12-25T09:15:44Z")
At least be educational about it, give three: metamorphic, igneous and sedimentary. ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/11 "2010-12-25T11:01:45Z")
You could put the vegemite on his tongue. Stop him swearing 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/12 "2010-12-25T12:11:30Z")
What if he treats the rock as a pet? ---
**Author:** ![Sr\_Siete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6de8d8/32.png) [@Sr\_Siete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sr_Siete)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/13 "2010-12-25T12:18:22Z")
You’ll spoil him. When I was a kid we just got our Christmas beating, before going to work to the mines, **and we liked it!** ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/14 "2010-12-25T12:22:08Z")
When I grew up, only rich people could afford to give their children rocks. We were so poor… ---
**Author:** ![kombatminipig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5ac83/32.png) [@kombatminipig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kombatminipig)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/15 "2010-12-25T13:01:04Z")
> [@Cicero](#): > > When I grew up, only rich people could afford to give their children rocks. > > We were so poor… …that all my dad gave me for Christmas was a pit thread, before beating me to death with his belt. And I liked it! ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/16 "2010-12-25T13:08:57Z")
We are moving into kinky territory here. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/17 "2010-12-25T13:43:51Z")
> [@kombatminipig](#): > > …that all my dad gave me for Christmas was a pit thread, before beating me to death with his belt. And I liked it! > [@Cicero](#): > > We are moving into kinky territory here. Only if the rock has a whip. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/18 "2010-12-25T15:12:40Z")
Rocks. What a lucky kid. One year all I got was 3 pebbles and 7 grains of sand. ---
**Author:** ![Sr\_Siete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6de8d8/32.png) [@Sr\_Siete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sr_Siete)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/19 "2010-12-25T15:26:24Z")
> [@racer72](#): > > Rocks. What a lucky kid. One year all I got was 3 pebbles and 7 grains of sand. Oh-la-di-da. Mister Moneybags had grains of actual sand! We used to dream of getting sand! My parents would save up all year just so we could have some **dust** for Christmas! ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2010, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346/20 "2010-12-25T15:28:51Z")
One Christmas I got a single molecule. And not even a good molecule. I think it was Iron. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-giving-my-son-a-rock-for-christmas/565346.md?page=2)