# I'm glad I'm not Jessica Simpson. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 27, 2004, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738 "2004-03-27T15:21:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/1 "2004-03-27T15:21:02Z")
Until a few days ago I wouldn’t have known who Jessica Simpson was if she had approached me in the street. Now I suppose I will be accused of being culturally ignorant because I also didn’t know the name of that actor (whose name I have forgotten) who disappeared and then turned up dead. Anyhow a few days ago they had some reality TV show about her. I saw the shorts and caught a few minutes of the show and it seemed to be her “husband” (I don’t know) and friends revelling in how stupid she is. Tonight I caught her on a replay of an old Letterman show and boy can she sing. Not something I would buy but she showed lots of musical smarts in her interpretation of “You Take My Breath Away”. Well I hope hubby and the friends enjoy the spoils of her vocal talents and I hope she can find a buddy who advises her against being held up to ridicule for money. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/2 "2004-03-27T15:24:04Z")
Not a poll or a minor debate, just an opinion piece about a media figure? Sending this to Cafe Society. ---
**Author:** ![xvxdarkknightxvx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/34f0e0/32.png) [@xvxdarkknightxvx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xvxdarkknightxvx)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/3 "2004-03-27T18:31:22Z")
I’m almost positive she’s not as stupid as she seems. I think the editing team for the show purposely leaves out any epiphanies she has. The show’s all in good fun. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![TWDuke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@TWDuke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TWDuke)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/4 "2004-03-27T20:02:32Z")
> [@](#): > > Now I suppose I will be accused of being culturally ignorant because I also didn’t know the name of that actor (whose name I have forgotten) who disappeared and then turned up dead. If you mean [Spalding Gray](http://imdb.com/name/nm0336960/), there have been several recent threads about him in Cafe Society. I’d link to them for you if I hadn’t recently been stripped of search capabilities. Not that I’m bitter or anything. I have to admit that until a couple of weeks ago I thought Jessica Simpson was one of those famous-for-being-famous celebrities, like Paris Hilton, and I was surprised to learn that she had a talent beyond self-exposure. But subjecting herself to ridicule via “reality” television has made her much more well-known than arguably equally talented performers, and to many today, fame is the highest good. (Of course, fame also translates into higher revenues from record deals, commercials, etc.) ---
**Author:** ![xvxdarkknightxvx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/34f0e0/32.png) [@xvxdarkknightxvx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xvxdarkknightxvx)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/5 "2004-03-27T20:16:16Z")
She’s actually been around since the Britney-types popped up. ---
**Author:** ![TWDuke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@TWDuke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TWDuke)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/6 "2004-03-27T22:10:57Z")
Yep, she’s been around and has had considerable success as a pop singer, but even people who would never have head of her otherwise know that she didn’t realize Chicken of the Sea is tuna., a “mistake” that has gotten her and Chicekn of the Sea lots of free publicity and helped guarantee her show’s renewal. ---
**Author:** ![TWDuke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@TWDuke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TWDuke)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/7 "2004-03-27T22:12:15Z")
Sigh. Maybe someday one of my punctuation or coding errors will make me rich and famous. > **[Jessica Simpson gets an education on Chicken Of The Sea](http://www.realitytvworld.com/index/articles/story.php?s=1886)** > > It took a few months, but Jessica Simpson is now apparently clear on what's inside a can of Chicken Of The Sea. Turning an embarrassing public gaffe into a public relations opportunity like only a true "pop princess" can, Simpson "surprised" the... ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2004, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/8 "2004-03-28T03:20:56Z")
The MTV show is “Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica.” And yes, she is that stupid. Nick isn’t riding her gravy train, he’s got some dough of his own from being in the boy band 98 Degrees. His interest in Jessica mostly derives from riding something else of hers. And she famously made him wait until marriage until he was able to get on board. Now, after trashing her, let me say that she is very pretty, she is musically talented, she was spoiled by her parents (so let’s put some blame there), and she tries to do the right thing (though, at times, she’s pouty when she doesn’t get her way). So, the question is would you be as beautiful, rich, and talented as Jessica with a hot hubby if you also had to accept some brain damage? Peace. ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2004, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/9 "2004-03-28T03:25:43Z")
I’ve never seen the show, but I saw Simpson when she was a guest on Letterman and she didn’t actually seem all that dumb. I was kind of disappointed, because I’d heard all about what an idiot she was! She’s obviously no rocket scientist, but didn’t appear to be any less intelligent than the average pop starlet, or even the average pampered rich white girl. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2004, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/10 "2004-03-28T03:50:24Z")
> [@TWDuke](#): > > but even people who would never have head of her otherwise know that she didn’t realize Chicken of the Sea is tuna., a “mistake” that has gotten her and Chicekn of the Sea lots of free publicity and helped guarantee her show’s renewal. And don’t forget the “which part of the Buffalo are Buffalo Wings from?” That one even drew the ire of her own fans. ---
**Author:** ![Headcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6bbea6/32.png) [@Headcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Headcoat)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2004, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/11 "2004-03-28T03:58:58Z")
Though I am glad I’m not Jessica Simpson, I wouldn’t mind being her husband Nick for a night or two. ---
**Author:** ![ThatGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e5b9ba/32.png) [@ThatGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThatGuy)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2004, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/12 "2004-03-28T04:36:49Z")
I actually found the reality show intresting, sure i realize it was edited to leave certain impression for entertainment value…but it was good to see a “pop star” and her semi- pop star husband be “real”. Yes she’s spoiled and rich and not the sharpest knife the drawer…but she is essentially a good person. Not to mention MUCH more talented than brittney or her clones. ---
**Author:** ![Yookeroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yookeroo/32/323_2.png) [@Yookeroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yookeroo)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2004, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/13 "2004-03-28T06:54:50Z")
I will say this much for her, she’s probably not as dumb as Surreal Lifer Traci Bingham. ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2004, 7:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-glad-im-not-jessica-simpson/236738/14 "2004-03-28T07:02:50Z")
Lol.