# I'm going to be a girl. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 8, 2005, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193 "2005-08-08T21:53:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![pand](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b38774/32.png) [@pand](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pand)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/21 "2005-08-09T05:24:53Z")
> [@Seren](#): > > The problem is…I have no idea how to make female friends now. I know I had them when I was little, but I don’t remember how I met or became friends with any of them. Did the same thing myself a few years back, like my girl genes suddenly kicked in and I no longer felt like vomiting rather than wear a skirts and heels. But, a thought from personal experience, if I may. Female friends can be very complicated. Amazing women friends abound, but there are a few cats in the mix, and now that you’re walking the walk and talking talk, some women will find you threatening, especially if you’re more attractive, intelligent, sexy, honest, cultured, whatever, than they are. Some will find you threatening just because you’re new to the scene. I have, and have had, great friends of both genders, but in comparing the damage each can do, it’s a fellow woman who has the most potential to chop you off at the knees and drag you by bloody stumps through her own version of hell. So, paint your toenails, find that gloss colour that makes potential partners want to suck the lips from your face, and listen to your gut instinct when the other girls are getting chatty. ---
**Author:** ![Dark\_Side\_of\_the\_Floyd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bb73d2/32.png) [@Dark\_Side\_of\_the\_Floyd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dark_Side_of_the_Floyd)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/22 "2005-08-09T05:43:58Z")
I’ll never be a girl. You’ll pry the carpenter’s pants out of my cold, dead fingers, dammit! You’ll never take me alive! ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/23 "2005-08-09T05:47:37Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > I read the OP three or four times before I realized you weren’t coming out as transgendered. Must work on those comprehension skills. We’ve had any number of those threads here, so I wouldn’t blame you. That was my assumption when I clicked over. ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/24 "2005-08-09T05:55:52Z")
> [@Anne Neville](#): > > I tried to be a girl while I was **planning my wedding** , and I didn’t manage to do it. **I used to do astrophysics** , and that was easier… Damnit! I’m always too late on the draw. You know, if that marriage thing doesn’t work out for you…oh, never mind. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/25 "2005-08-09T06:09:55Z")
Gay guy here, and never done drag or felt any need to, but one thing I am amazed about women is how much time it takes to “get ready”. Sure, I know some guys who spend hours getting ready just to go out and get the newspaper, but for the most part, a guy can jump out of bed, shower and get dressed and be out the door in 15 minutes tops. The time, the money, the process of learning how to do everything, plus the competition of other women standing next to you sizing you up, and then keeping up with the fashions, and then deciding if the fashions work for you, and then having to keep that up the entire day…well, I am worn out thinking about it. I have occasionally seen the show “what to wear” and if I were a woman, half way through the episode I would shave my head and put on a moo-moo and hightail it out the door. ---
**Author:** ![Ashes\_Ashes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@Ashes\_Ashes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashes_Ashes)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/26 "2005-08-09T06:32:04Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > I read the OP three or four times before I realized you weren’t coming out as transgendered. Must work on those comprehension skills… You did much better than I. I even read your post and was half way through the thread before I figured it out. It’s the _SDMB_– that waffle cone could be holding any flavor of ice cream possible, and a few that aren’t. > [@](#): > > I still have to say that pink is a horrible color. I’ll only wear what pink genetics provides me. Sacrilege! Pink is a faaaabulous color. On me. When I wear it, it’s the equivalent of a week’s vacation for my appearance. Barbie pink is evil though. I’ve always been a girl, but that encompasses many things. I don’t know if I’ve ever contemplated something and thought it was for guys only. I certainly don’t think that doing typically guy stuff makes me less feminine. It’s all good! Make-up, hair styling, and maintenance stuff like shaving, manicure, pedicure, and skin care are neat experiments finding the right product for you and your lifestyle. Practise will make you better and faster; I can do full make-up in less than ten minutes (and I don’t look like a clown, I’m asked for advice which I think is a good sign, right?). Girly clothes are fun if you treat them as fun. You get to buy pretty things and wear them to show everybody your new pretty. Always buy the right size for you and don’t let yourself get talked into something you don’t really like. I have a couple of outrageous outfits that I wouldn’t have had the guts to wear ten years ago, but I took baby steps and learned along the way. ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/27 "2005-08-09T06:54:31Z")
I like girly stuff some of the time. I’ve actually been _wearing skirts_ this summer. I never wear skirts. I will say this though, I don’t wear heels. I’m 6’1, I don’t need more height and my feet hurt after an hour in them. I can roll out of bed, shower and put on makeup in 15 minutes though. ---
**Author:** ![jabiru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/bbce88/32.png) [@jabiru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jabiru)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/28 "2005-08-09T06:56:27Z")
I used to be a girl. A long time ago, until I turned into a middle aged woman. I still go in phases with the skirts/makeup thing. I’ll probably get the hang of it by the time I’m 90 or so. ---
**Author:** ![gfloyd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d2c977/32.png) [@gfloyd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gfloyd)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 9:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/29 "2005-08-09T09:15:17Z")
I have a hard time understanding the diffiuclty with high heels. I never owned a pair until I lost weight and my feet got a size smaller and two widths narrower, but I just put on a pair and walked fine. And I am not, shall we say, graceful. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 9:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/30 "2005-08-09T09:49:40Z")
Welcome to the SDMB, **Seren**! Actually, talking about make-up and clothes is a kind of woman-bonding thing. You could use that to solve two problems at once. Say you were my co-worker and you said to me (or posted on the company messageboard): "Hi Maastricht ! You know, I think you dress nice, and there’s this party I want to go to and I want to dress fancy and frankly being a jeans-girl I have no idea where to start with clothes and make-up, would you perhaps want to come to the mall with me during lunch break and advice me some? ". I would feel flattered and jump at the chance to show off my shopperskills and make-up artist skills. In fact, I have girliefied one of my co-workers a bit, and I loved every minute of it. She did, too, we had a great time. The make-up clueless might like to know there are a few good how-to books on make-up on the market. There is a lot of crap about, books compiled from left-over photo’s from modelshoots with unhelpful captions like “Choosing the right shade of lipstick is very important”. My two favourite authors slash make-upartists, to get you started, are [Bobbi Brown](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-form/104-7866596-6371914) and [Kevyn Aucoin](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/index=books&field-author-exact=Kevyn%20Aucoin/104-7866596-6371914). Bobbi Brown is about nice neat everyday make-up; Kevyn is more outrageous. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/31 "2005-08-09T11:37:25Z")
> [@](#): > > I can pass as a girl…until I open my mouth, that is. I curse like a sailor Fuck. You too? 😃 🆒 I am sometimes mostly sure that I am the only woman in my demographic that swears. I seem to shock a few people. And what is wrong with the word Fuck? It is so perfect for so many occasions? ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/32 "2005-08-09T13:28:50Z")
> [@UrbanChic](#): > > To complete the illusion, however, my toes are usually painted a nice shade of pink. Okay, I think I see a part of the problem. Try it once with just the toenails painted! Tris ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/33 "2005-08-09T13:50:22Z")
So are you dancing around your room singing “I feel pretty”, 'cause I’m kind of picturing you doing that. Now was that directed at **Seren** or **matt\_mcl**? ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/34 "2005-08-09T14:15:35Z")
> [@Triskadecamus](#): > > Okay, I think I see a part of the problem. Try it once with just the toenails painted! Just the _nail_, huh? Well, it sounds weird, but I’m willing to give anything a whirl once. I’ll let you know how it all turns out. ---
**Author:** ![Spiff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiff/32/9852_2.png) [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/35 "2005-08-09T15:11:26Z")
> [@Shirley Ujest](#): > > Fuck? It is so perfect for so many occasions? Fuck. It’s what’s for dinner. ---
**Author:** ![Seren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e19adc/32.png) [@Seren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seren)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/36 "2005-08-09T15:39:02Z")
Thanks for the support and helpful tips everyone (especially **pand** and **Maastricht** -I’ll definitely look into books by those two you recommended). 🙂 My guy friends think this change is hilarious, though one of them has offered to help me pick out clothes. He’s straight, but man, he’s got some fashion sense. Mom told me a few days ago that I should always let him choose my outfits for me. > [@Zebra](#): > > So are you dancing around your room singing “I feel pretty”, 'cause I’m kind of picturing you doing that. Actually, I’m just staring at myself in the mirror a lot and sniffing my wrists. I love this perfume! 🙂 It smells just like pipe tobacco. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/37 "2005-08-09T16:23:35Z")
> [@Seren](#): > > I love this perfume! It smells just like pipe tobacco. Oh yes. I can see now that this transformation is going to turn out just swell. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/38 "2005-08-09T16:28:23Z")
Wow. These types of discussions totally befuddle me. My coworker once posted a dissertation (practically) on her LJ about makeup. Foundations, texture, how to build from dark to light, etc. Memorizing baseball stats is easier. Rocket science is easier. One of the most amazing discussions I ever heard was between two other coworkers: a country girl butch lesbian and a flambouyant gay guy. She said she wanted to go as one of the Village People for Halloween. He told her in exact minute detail the types of clothes each member wore, the brand names, where to shop for them, the whole nine yards. I just stood there, astounded. I know I bought my britches from Target, but I don’t remember the brand name or any of that shit. ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/39 "2005-08-09T16:38:49Z")
I vaguely resemble a girl, and here’s a tip: Go and purchase about 50 pairs of shoes. Strappy, absurd, non-practical shoes. You’ll instantly feel more feminine, and then you can participate in the many “Look at my new shoes!” threads (many of which are started by me) and roll your eyes when the straight men come in and post links to hiking boots. It’s great! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Seren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e19adc/32.png) [@Seren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seren)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2005, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193/40 "2005-08-09T16:57:38Z")
> [@DMark](#): > > Oh yes. I can see now that this transformation is going to turn out just swell. 😃 I’ve got a lot of work to do, I know. Just for the record, it’s not really pipe tobacco scented. It’s cherry vanilla and I doubt people would smell me and think “Oh, she smells like a pipe.” I’ve just made the association because it smells like tobacco my dad used to have when I was little. Which I suppose didn’t smell like tobacco as much as it smelled like cherry vanilla perfume. 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-going-to-be-a-girl/316193.md?page=3)