# "I'm just being nosy" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 29, 2004, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089 "2004-03-29T15:42:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/21 "2004-03-29T18:28:10Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > A great approach to a nosy coworker. > > **jarbaby** , fair enough; I guess Miss Manners’s approach strikes me as not so much condescending as veiledly snarky. If someone said this to me, my likely response would be an embarrassed laugh and a, “fair enough.” From my experience, annoying people don’t get subtle digs. Since your response is reasonable and you would be embarrassed, I find it hard to believe you would be in that situation in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/22 "2004-03-29T18:35:32Z")
> [@sunfish](#): > > Maybe the reason your position was open is that no one can stand to be around him for more than 2 weeks? 😉 > > Seriously, I understand. I have a co-worker who absolutely MUST see whatever is on my monitor, and if he can’t get a good view before the screen saver kicks in (while we are talking), he’ll actually reach across my desk to jiggle the mouse and switch back out of the screen saver. :rolleyes: One of these days I’ll make a point of “accidentally” bringing up some raunchy guy pic when he stops by; maybe then he’ll knock it off. Good GOD, if I had a coworker that jiggled my mouse so they could see what was underneath my screensaver, (I feel so very wrong, typing that) they’d likely not get their grubby little paw _back_. I’m not an overly private person, but shit. That’s just rude as hell. I agree you should put a password on it, and the next time he does it, just ask “can I help you find something?” coupled with a nice, icy glare. People like that sometimes need to be shamed into learning some freaking manners. As for the “I’m just NOSY” types (and I’ve known plenty) I’d usually just give them an ominous “_well, curiosity DID kill the cat_” coupled with an evil, evil grin. They back off every time. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/23 "2004-03-29T18:35:46Z")
> [@jarbabyj](#): > > More often than not, Miss Manners strikes me as the most condescending person on the planet. Apparently that’s how you be polite, by being condescending. I know, I don’t get it either. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/24 "2004-03-29T18:52:32Z")
> [@lezlers](#): > > Good GOD, if I had a coworker that jiggled my mouse so they could see what was underneath my screensaver, I think this is hysterical. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/25 "2004-03-29T19:00:20Z")
> [@Lord Ashtar](#): > > Apparently that’s how you be polite, by being condescending. > > I know, I don’t get it either. That’s quite all right, dear boy; you don’t need to get it. I’d pat you on the head, but some small shred of self-preservation instinct is stopping me. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/26 "2004-03-29T19:15:46Z")
> [@jarbabyj](#): > > I’ve got to tell you. More often than not, Miss Manners strikes me as the most condescending person on the planet. You can be blunt without being the exceedingly snotty. > > What’s wrong with “if you don’t mind, these emails are private?”. Why do you have to add the “how quaint?” > > I’d rather be punched in the face than talked down to. I rather think that’s the entire point. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/27 "2004-03-29T19:15:52Z")
> [@Lord Ashtar](#): > > Apparently that’s how you be polite, by being condescending. > > I know, I don’t get it either. Reminds me of a conversation between two of my friends recently. Friend 1 does something courteous. Friend 2: “Quit being so condescending!” Friend 1: “I’m not being condescending, I’m being courteous.” Friend 2: “At a certain point, they’re the same thing.” \*pause" Friend 1: “Wow, I guess you’re right.” ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/28 "2004-03-29T19:24:22Z")
How about just saying, “Well, I’d rather you weren’t,” and then turn away and go on? Still polite, but blunt enough to get the point across. People like that piss me off. Usually when I say, “May I be nosy?” it’s usually tongue in cheek during a gossip fest. Maybe let him glimpse this thread could also help… ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/29 "2004-03-29T19:37:43Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > How about just saying, “Well, I’d rather you weren’t,” and then turn away and go on? Still polite, but blunt enough to get the point across. > > People like that piss me off. > > Usually when I say, “May I be nosy?” it’s usually tongue in cheek during a gossip fest. > > Maybe let him glimpse this thread could also help… Howdy stranger. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/30 "2004-03-29T21:05:07Z")
My two cents on this, I also find it irritating whenever someone announces they’re about to be rude or obnoxious, believing that this some how makes it acceptable to the rest of the civilized world. One response I have found successful in the past, whenever someone is pulling this kind of nonsense is to just ignore the whole nosy and / or rude issue and jump, with incredulity in your voice, directly to, ‘And you feel the need to boast because you’re so proud of this?’ Give it a go, it might put it in perspective for them. Peace ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/31 "2004-03-29T21:12:43Z")
Part of me would be tempted to be ‘just nosy’ right back at him. Dude, where’d you get such ugly ass shoes? HAHA! Just Nosy! Hey, Have you always been so nosy? Just Nosy! I’m sure you can come up with other things to be ‘just nosy’ about, too. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/32 "2004-03-29T21:23:46Z")
Spray him with a fire extinguisher. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/33 "2004-03-29T22:04:38Z")
Don’t be dissin’ my girl Miss Manners. Esprix ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/34 "2004-03-29T22:07:48Z")
> [@lieu](#): > > Spray him with a fire extinguisher. Oh lieu. That’s your answer for EVERYTHING. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/35 "2004-03-29T22:14:41Z")
> [@jarbabyj](#): > > Oh lieu. That’s your answer for EVERYTHING. Except fires. ---
**Author:** ![county](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ce7236/32.png) [@county](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/county)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/36 "2004-03-29T22:16:21Z")
> [@jarbabyj](#): > > I’ve got to tell you. More often than not, Miss Manners strikes me as the most condescending person on the planet. You can be blunt without being the exceedingly snotty. > > What’s wrong with “if you don’t mind, these emails are private?”. Why do you have to add the “how quaint?” > > I’d rather be punched in the face than talked down to. Well, in fairness to Miss Manners, who I really appreciate, that is not a Miss Manners quote - it’s actually county saying what he thinks Miss Manners might say. ---
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/37 "2004-03-29T22:16:17Z")
> [@](#): > > Oh lieu. That’s your answer for EVERYTHING. Nah, usually his answer is in some way related to his ass. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/38 "2004-03-29T22:21:27Z")
> [@Jenaroph](#): > > Nah, usually his answer is in some way related to his ass. Okay… spray him with my ass. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/39 "2004-03-29T22:34:29Z")
If you really wanted to be charitable you can pull him aside on your last day and tell him, “Dude, the cute ‘I’m just being nosy bit?’ Yeah, not so much. It’s really annoying, so much I posted about it on this VERY popular message board. Everyone there thinks you’re a big tool, so I would suggest minding your own goddamned business in the future. You’re not being friendly, you’re being incredibly intrusive.” Then, if you need to, throw in a snotty Miss Manners cocked eyebrow as you saunter out the door for the last time. ---
**Author:** ![Gamaliel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b487fb/32.png) [@Gamaliel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gamaliel)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2004, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089/40 "2004-03-29T23:44:51Z")
Hit him with a banjo. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-just-being-nosy/237089.md?page=3)