# I'm never going to have a girlfriend, either (with a twist) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 19, 2003, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296 "2003-08-19T21:40:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/1 "2003-08-19T21:40:27Z")
Might want to try that again… ---
**Author:** ![Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Krisfer\_the\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Krisfer_the_Cat)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/2 "2003-08-19T22:51:38Z")
Mystery thread… So do we talk among ourselves until it gets corrected? ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/3 "2003-08-19T23:24:43Z")
Well, we could try to guess what the twist is. My guess is that he’s either illiterate or invisible… ---
**Author:** ![AbbySthrnAccent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@AbbySthrnAccent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AbbySthrnAccent)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/4 "2003-08-19T23:43:37Z")
She can’t date ya if you’re not there! ---
**Author:** ![Ultraviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/c77e96/32.png) [@Ultraviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ultraviolet)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/5 "2003-08-19T23:44:37Z")
Actually, the twist is that I’m a woman. Being invisible would certainly provide interesting obstacles to finding a partner, though! Sorry, I’m not sure exactly why my OP didn’t show up at the top of the thread. I asked the mods to delete the thread, but maybe that’s not necessary if I rephrase my original post. I live in a medium sized town that has a small gay and lesbian community that I am quite active in. However, I am finding it very difficult to find a girlfriend. Most of the women my age are very “cliquey” and seem to be paired off besides. It is very difficult to make any inroads into this group unless you know someone to introduce you around. (Sounds like high-school!) Most of my lesbian friends are quite a bit older than me, and I feel no romantic attraction to any of them (that’s not to say that if the right older woman came along I would be bothered by an age-difference). Another problem is that since it is such a small community, people pair up at roughly the speed of light. As soon as anyone new comes along, there are several women very aggressively after her, and it seems often within a couple of weeks, the new person is practially married. I find it tremendously frustrating, since I like to take things slower and get to know someone (the fact that I’m quite shy doesn’t help either). I have also tried the personals on the internet. There doesn’t seem to be anybody near here looking for a girlfriend, except for straight couples looking for a woman to join in (and I am not interested in that). I suppose one obvious solution would be to move to a larger city with a larger lesbian community. This is unfortunately not possible at the moment, as I have a good job and am saving up to go to grad school. I would like to stick it out here for at least another year. In the meantime, though, I would like a girlfriend. Any advice… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/6 "2003-08-19T23:45:56Z")
I was figuring the OP was either a gay male or a straight female. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/7 "2003-08-19T23:50:04Z")
wrong on both counts. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2003, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/8 "2003-08-19T23:53:41Z")
I was going to guess that this was an engagement announcement. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-never-going-to-have-a-girlfriend-either-with-a-twist/196296/9 "2003-08-20T00:08:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fretful Porpentine \* > \*\*Well, we could try to guess what the twist is. My guess is that he’s either illiterate or invisible… \*\* 😛