# I'm no racist, but... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 21, 2010, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995 "2010-12-21T20:00:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/1 "2010-12-21T20:00:17Z")
I am a bitter hypocrite. There is too damned much variation in the human condition and we are too tolerant of thieves and liars._Too. Damned._ Violent criminals, too. And stupid people. Jesus! at what point does a species become so prolific that it feels it can suffer the least competetive specimens of itself because it feels its success is guarandamnteed? Listen, Humans ain’t exactly scarce. Why do we put up with shitheads rather than use them for fishbait, or why not, food. All this boo-hooing about prisoner’s rights, privacy rights, special rights…Humbug! Whatever happened to good old tormenting the round peg in the village of square holes? And y’know what else? We need to stop whinging about “collateral damage” in wars. MoFo’s had the right idea back in the early 20th century–war should be very unpleasant for the constituency of the leadership that rocked the international boat. Betcha Iraq woulda turned out different if the locals knew how bad we were gonna make their lives if they didn’t do something about their leader (whom we installed, but trouble us not with trifles). Maybe, rather than wooing the Afghanis to be our friends and help us overthrow their oppressive (to us) leadership we should have explained: give us OBL or we carpet bomb your crummy little villages and torch your poppy fields. And we needn’t stop at international politics–If Obama had been half the man we need him to be, there would have been congressional purges the first time someone breathed a word about opposing just to oppose. The Fox heads whose sole contribution to society is to foment dissent at the expense of verifiable truth? Fishbait. Well, you get the idea. ---
**Author:** ![Candyman74](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Candyman74](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Candyman74)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/2 "2010-12-21T20:02:21Z")
What does race have to do with your post, and why was it entitled “I’m no racist ,but…”? ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/3 "2010-12-21T20:04:11Z")
> [@Candyman74](#): > > What does race have to do with your post, and why was it entitled “I’m no racist ,but…”? Not a damned thing, just throwing it out there. ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/4 "2010-12-21T20:04:22Z")
Who pissed in _your_ cornflakes this morning? ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/5 "2010-12-21T20:20:04Z")
I used to be a racist. Mostly bmx bikes but there was no real money in it and once I got a car and was able to drive I quit riding bikes all together. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/6 "2010-12-21T20:22:19Z")
> [@NinetyWt](#): > > Who pissed in _your_ cornflakes this morning? It doesn’t matter. Can’t it be enough that there is piss in my cornflakes? Should I have to watch my cornflakes to make sure nobody pisses in them? What is it with everybody wanting to do the finger-pointy thing? How about we just don’t piss in each other’s cornflakes, or is that too much to expect? :mad: ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/7 "2010-12-21T20:26:51Z")
I just might be interested in a trial subscription to your newsletter… ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Call\_Me\_Shirley](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Don\_t\_Call\_Me\_Shirley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Call_Me_Shirley)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/8 "2010-12-21T20:33:18Z")
You’re home early today. What happened, the saloon burned down? ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/9 "2010-12-21T20:43:51Z")
> [@Don\_t\_Call\_Me\_Shirley](#): > > You’re home early today. What happened, the saloon burned down? See? this is exactly what I’m on about! What’s a saloon got to do with anything? If my saloon had burned down then presumably I wouldn’t be as drunk as if it hadn’t’ve. So really, what’s your point **NotShirley**? Do you support setting fire to kittens, too? Why do you hate kittens? What did kittens ever do to you? Blah, you make my temples throb. Or maybe that’s just the kickin’ sound system. And **billfish** , get in here and find a teg to kap. ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/10 "2010-12-21T21:11:47Z")
> [@Don\_t\_Call\_Me\_Shirley](#): > > You’re home early today. What happened, the saloon burned down? If that had happened, he would be found writhing and weeping in the ashes. Maybe someone moved his cheese? ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/11 "2010-12-21T21:18:33Z")
Waiter! Check please. ---
**Author:** ![dhkendall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9adbd/32.png) [@dhkendall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dhkendall)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/12 "2010-12-21T21:50:15Z")
So _that’s_ what “A Modest Proposal” would have looked like if it was written in the 2010s! Nice to know! ---
**Author:** ![InterestedObserver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@InterestedObserver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InterestedObserver)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2010, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/13 "2010-12-21T23:50:17Z")
I’ve never understood the logic (or lack thereof) of the position that if we make the lives of those living under a “brutal dictotorship” (according to the ones making the argument) miserable enough, they will be incentivized to rise up and overthrow said dictator. UMMMM, so it’s a dictatorship in which the people have NO POWER, but they will somehow be motivated to and find the means to take power from their oppressors IF we kill enough of them??? 😕:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/14 "2010-12-22T00:50:44Z")
You know what _I_ hate? **Mimes!** Does that make me Mime-ist? ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/15 "2010-12-22T00:56:06Z")
Since this is a thread about being irrationally upset, I might as well bring it up here: “I have goblins in my pants, please Straight Dope, tell me a factual answer to getting rid of them.” ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/16 "2010-12-22T00:59:36Z")
> [@InterestedObserver](#): > > UMMMM, so it’s a dictatorship in which the people have NO POWER, but they will somehow be motivated to and find the means to take power from their oppressors IF we kill enough of them??? 😕:rolleyes: Yeah, but you do nothing about the dicktater and people bitch…you DO do something about evil dicktater and people bitch. Personally, if we come in and take out the tater and the country still goes to shit I think thats on the people that live in that country. Now whether we SHOULD take out the tater is whole nother debate. Now, where’s my first trial issue dammit? ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/17 "2010-12-22T01:58:00Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#): > > See? this is exactly what I’m on about! What’s a saloon got to do with anything? If my saloon had burned down then presumably I wouldn’t be as drunk as if it hadn’t’ve. So really, what’s your point **NotShirley**? Do you support setting fire to kittens, too? Why do you hate kittens? What did kittens ever do to you? Blah, you make my temples throb. Or maybe that’s just the kickin’ sound system. > > And **billfish** , get in here and find a teg to kap. Fire + Kittens = Fried Kittens. MMmmmm…Fried Kittens…MMMMMMMMmmmm… ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/18 "2010-12-22T02:03:44Z")
> [@InterestedObserver](#): > > I’ve never understood the logic (or lack thereof) of the position that if we make the lives of those living under a “brutal dictotorship” (according to the ones making the argument) miserable enough, they will be incentivized to rise up and overthrow said dictator. > > UMMMM, so it’s a dictatorship in which the people have NO POWER, but they will somehow be motivated to and find the means to take power from their oppressors IF we kill enough of them??? 😕:rolleyes: It’s simple math. The revolution happens when there are more oppressed than people to stop the oppressed. They aren’t taking power–by being in larger numbers, they already had it. Dictatorships are about the illusion of powerlessness. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/19 "2010-12-22T02:07:12Z")
> [@descamisado](#): > > Since this is a thread about being irrationally upset, I might as well bring it up here: > > “I have goblins in my pants, please Straight Dope, tell me a factual answer to getting rid of them.” Insert worgen to cancel out the goblin presence. Kill the OP while you’re at it, he’s wasting time posting on a message board instead of contributing positively to society. By my metrics, that makes him worthy of death. Off with his head! More seriously, if we were to actually carry out the OP’s philosophy, we would extinguish our species in short order. Because everyone has different standards of “smart enough.” My religious right relatives would have all liberals and all atheists executed. Christopher Dawkins would execute my relatives. In the end all we’d have left is Stephen Hawking. And I don’t think he’s still reproductively viable. I like our current system, where nutjob theories like this aren’t given the time of day. ---
**Author:** ![may\_be\_ignorant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c5a1d2/32.png) [@may\_be\_ignorant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/may_be_ignorant)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2010, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995/20 "2010-12-22T02:12:27Z")
Good one. It was a joke, right? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-no-racist-but/564995.md?page=2)