# I'm not buying you a fucking house **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 16, 2003, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957 "2003-01-16T12:52:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/1 "2003-01-16T12:52:32Z")
My lazy, greedy wife happened to get her nose into the estate settlement papers I had to sign, and found out how much I’m inheriting. True to form, she’s found a new house for me to buy with the dough. These are the facts of life, sweetheart: 1. When I get the money, it goes directly into a trust where you will **NEVER** be able to get your fingers into it. Should I croak, your son will be the sole beneficiary of that trust. 2. Other than the $10k I decided to earmark for the rugrat’s college fund, I am using the rest for grad school for me. Period. 3. If I don’t get into grad school, or wash out, it’s a leg up on my retirement. I’ll be damned if I piss it away like I did with the life insurance money. Sure our house is too small, and has appreciated 25% since we bought it. Yes, it’s going to be sold in the near future. Just wait until you see the shoebox in the student ghetto we move to, you greedy bitch… ---
**Author:** ![kabbes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e99b99/32.png) [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/2 "2003-01-16T12:53:45Z")
Woah ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/3 "2003-01-16T12:57:02Z")
Can you _feel_ the love? This is the woman you’re married to? Or the woman you’re in the processing of divorcing? ---
**Author:** ![In\_Conceivable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4bbf92/32.png) [@In\_Conceivable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/In_Conceivable)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/4 "2003-01-16T13:00:02Z")
If he isn’t in the process of divorcing he might be soon… ---
**Author:** ![Cubsfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Cubsfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cubsfan)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/5 "2003-01-16T13:00:17Z")
What the fuck is going on here? You should divorce the greedy bitch and kick her ass out on the street and then go titty fuck a DD cupped Whooore down on the avenue! That would be the fucking shizznizzle! ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/6 "2003-01-16T13:13:08Z")
Will you at least buy _me_ a house? Please? ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/7 "2003-01-16T13:17:31Z")
> [@](#): > > What the fuck is going on here? You should divorce the greedy bitch and kick her ass out on the street and then go titty fuck a DD cupped Whooore down on the avenue! dont forget the 8 balls! ---
**Author:** ![Goober\_McFly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/49beb7/32.png) [@Goober\_McFly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Goober_McFly)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/8 "2003-01-16T13:23:45Z")
Could I borrow $20? ---
**Author:** ![Siemsi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b19c9b/32.png) [@Siemsi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siemsi)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/9 "2003-01-16T13:27:43Z")
Whoa…Why are you married to this woman? Isn’t marriage about sharing, caring, respecting? WTF?!??! ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/10 "2003-01-16T13:27:56Z")
Yeah, whoo boy. One piece of advice for you, son… If your relationship with your wife has broken down to that point it’s time to re-examine (with or without a counselor) whether that marriage is worthy of continuing. Whoo boy. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/11 "2003-01-16T13:39:07Z")
Sounds like an excellent marriage you got there, my man. Keep up the good work! ---
**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/12 "2003-01-16T13:39:53Z")
Woo-hoo! Student shoeboxes! Oh, and get a divorce, please. Think of the children! (I’m only half joking with that. God knows I’d be a happier, healthier person if my parents got a divorce long ago.) ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/13 "2003-01-16T13:41:56Z")
Blimey. I was feeling down, lately, about not being in a relationship. But all of a sudden, a life of solitary TV watching, frozen dinners, and relentless masturbation seems positively appealing by comparison. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/14 "2003-01-16T13:50:01Z")
Yes it’s a terrible thing when a wife wants a bigger house when the family is coming into money. Imagine the impudence that she would consider upsizing a somewhat cramped house if funds are going to be available to do so! It’s outrageous! You should beat her good! Oh the temerity of that lazy slattern! Wait I’m getting a vision…it’s hazy, but coming into view… Oh my GOD! It’s **your** money being spent on a HUGE house! But where are you?.. Oh it’s _not_ you, it’s your lawyer and your wife’s lawyer, and they’re _both_ buying houses! Imagine that! ---
**Author:** ![Triss](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Triss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triss)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/15 "2003-01-16T13:56:30Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Astro_ > It’s your money being spent on a HUGE house! But where are you?.. Oh it’s not you, it’s your lawyer and your wife’s lawyer, and they’re both buying houses! Imagine that! Can they do that? Is nothing sacred? Are spouses entitled to a cut of each others _inheritance_? I thought that was the one inviolate thing in Canada and Stateside. ---
**Author:** ![In\_Conceivable](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/4bbf92/32.png) [@In\_Conceivable](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/In_Conceivable)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/16 "2003-01-16T14:11:39Z")
I don’t know if she can get a cut of his inheritance or not. Hopefully she will end up with a big share of everything else they own. I have never seen anyone be so hateful when speaking about their wife. You make me sad and sick at the same time **vunderbob** ---
**Author:** ![istara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e79b87/32.png) [@istara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/istara)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/17 "2003-01-16T14:16:46Z")
Is this like a weird joke or do you guys have the Worst. Fucking. Marriage. Ever. ? (Even if it is a joke, it’s not very funny). ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/18 "2003-01-16T14:27:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Steve Wright \* > \*\*Blimey. > > I was feeling down, lately, about not being in a relationship. But all of a sudden, a life of solitary TV watching, frozen dinners, and relentless masturbation seems positively appealing by comparison. \*\* Y’know, if you spent more time watching cooking shows, you could solve one of those problems. And if you watch Nigella’s, it might improve the quality of one of the others… ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/19 "2003-01-16T14:32:19Z")
Isn’t there community property where you live? I mean, it’s her money too, isn’t it? Well. it would be if you were in sunny California. ---
**Author:** ![jazzmine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jazzmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jazzmine)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2003, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957/20 "2003-01-16T14:34:39Z")
How sad. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-buying-you-a-fucking-house/148957.md?page=2)