# I'm not eating the turkey. Get over it. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 24, 2004, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433 "2004-11-24T06:52:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/41 "2004-11-24T19:02:23Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > MIL ought to cook the bird properly. If she doesn’t want to thaw the bird safely because “that’s not how she does it”, I hardly see how duffer’s the one causing family difficulty. I dunno–I can’t help but think that if either party had been a little more dipomatic about it, this pit thread might never have happened. For example, putting the turkey in the fridge once is understandable. But putting it in a second time without discussing the issue with MIL is passive-aggressive. It’s spoiling for a fight. Instead, if it goes back out, that’s a good time to approach MIL and say, “Hey, listen, I noticed you put the turkey out on the counter. Is there any way I could persuade you to thaw it in the fridge? I’m kind of a freak about bacteria, and I’ve been reading all kinds of things about salmonella lately. I hate to be a bother, but I’d really appreciate it if we could do a fridgethaw.” Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/42 "2004-11-24T19:32:50Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > I feel extremely confident predicting that you’re not going to get sick eating a tofurkey, **Mr. Moto**. Call me Nostradamus ;). > > Daniel Are you kidding me? I get sick just thinking about it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/43 "2004-11-24T19:42:23Z")
> [@Trunk](#): > > Are you kidding me? I get sick just thinking about it. 😃 Which damn near **guarantees** you won’t get sick from eating it. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/44 "2004-11-24T19:55:04Z")
“Tofurkey is an abomination unto the Lord.” I’m pretty sure that’s in the Bible and if it isn’t, it’s an oversight. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/45 "2004-11-24T20:04:31Z")
**duffer** , you better cook the holy hell out of those brats! Because if you come down with even a tinge of upset stomach from them (or anything else on the dinner table), you know you’re not going to hear the end of it. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/46 "2004-11-24T20:11:46Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > “Tofurkey is an abomination unto the Lord.” Sure, but I love me some blasphemy. And tofurkey is actually pretty tasty: the guy who invented it is an alumnus of the school I went to (I wait while everyone gets over their astonishment), and in a class field trip, we stopped by his magnificent tempeh factory. He ended the tour by giving us each a sample of his newest product, the tofurkey. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/47 "2004-11-24T20:17:57Z")
As an aside, I had an eel roll once that incorporated a piece of his product; it made me loudly bemoan the state of our society, and I bet you know exactly the words I used. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![manhattan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manhattan/32/7_2.png) [@manhattan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manhattan)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/48 "2004-11-24T20:49:03Z")
> [@mks57](#): > > Family tradition is fine and all that, but at some point you have to stop catering to ignorance. Food poisoning is a significant health hazard, especially to the young, old, and sick. See [http://www.wrongdiagnosis.com/f/food\_poisoning/prevalence.htm](http://www.wrongdiagnosis.com/f/food_poisoning/prevalence.htm) Good idea. Let’s stop catering right here and right now. Food poisoning is annoying. 27% of the population gets it every year (more likely, less of the population gets it more often). It is _not_ a significant health hazard. According to your cite, 0.12% of the population gets sick enough to be hospitalized, and 0.002% of the population dies from it each year, approximately the same number of people who die in fires. ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/49 "2004-11-24T21:05:44Z")
You know, if **duffer** decided to eat the bird for the sake of family harmony, came down with food poisoning, and then posted about how miserable he is, most would be sympathetic, but some would rail against him for being so goddamned stupid for eating food that could make him sick. I can’t think of one good reason why he should put himself at the risk, no matter how small that risk may be. ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/50 "2004-11-24T21:23:04Z")
Wow, I didn’t expect this many responses. Lots of good advice here. Now, for the rest of the story. First, I don’t hate my MiL, and I didn’t give any indication of anger or frustration. That’s what I use the SDMB for. Thanks for helping me avoid ulcers. 😉 After putting the time and energy into the OP, it dawned on me how easy it is to avoid the whole problem. 20 minutes later I figured she was in bed, what could it hurt to toss it back in the fridge? So I did. This morning I got up early, took it out and let it sit a half hour till she went to work. Back in the fridge. I’ll take it back out around 7 tonight and when she gets home I’ll say “Hey, I think she’s thawed. Want me to put it back in the fridge?” Does that sound reasonable to anyone? Damnit, I look forward to turkey every year and I really don’t want to skip it this year. But now that the idea is in my head, I’m still gonna cook a few brats for the games. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/51 "2004-11-24T21:24:49Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > This morning I got up early, took it out and let it sit a half hour till she went to work. Back in the fridge. I’ll take it back out around 7 tonight and when she gets home I’ll say “Hey, I think she’s thawed. Want me to put it back in the fridge?” Does that sound reasonable to anyone? Sounds like the basis for a sitcom plot is what it sounds like. How do you think the tensions are gonna be if she finds out what you’re doing? Be diplomatic. Don’t be deceitful. Daniel ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/52 "2004-11-24T21:24:55Z")
You’ll be washing your hands with hot water and antibacterial soap before and after handling the turkey, right? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/53 "2004-11-24T21:50:35Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > WTF?!? 😕 :eek: :smack: > > I swear I’m gonna write a book about my in-laws someday. Though it’ll have to be filed in Sci-Fi since nobody will believe it. > > There is a 15 pound store-bought turkey sitting on my counter right now. It’s almost 1 am and it’s been there since noon. Twice tonight I’ve put it in the fridge to let it thaw in a manner as to not kill anyone eating it. Twice the MiL pulled it back out, the second time admonishing me to leave it be cuz time is wasting. > > :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: :smack: (Hell, there aren’t enough) > > There are 2 days (3 since purchase) to let it thaw in the fridge and reduce the chances of food poisoning. But, nooooooooo, it has to sit on the counter for 30 hours before refridgeration because, “That’s how we’ve always done it.” :rolleyes: I’m surprised my wife lived long enough to marry me. > > I half-snapped and told her I wouldn’t be eating any, since it’s so very, very wrong to leave raw poultry at room temp. She said not to worry, as it was frozen and therefore safe from bacteria. _She was arguing that since the core was still frozen, the whole thing was frozen._ > > Did I bother to point out that the core being frozen doesn’t mean the outer parts are not thawed and raw? Well, I’m glad you asked. Of fucking course I did! :smack: And now she’s pissed I have an attitude about her cooking the dinner, and maybe she should spend the day with her sister. I can’t fucking win on this one. That’s why I’m dumping on all of you. Again. :smack: :smack: > > So on the counter it shall sit tonight. And likely most of tomorrow. I, however, am looking forward to some tasty grilled brats with my potatoes and pumpkin pie. I can just see this being one of those wierd news items you see at the back of the paper’s front section. I \*presume \* you mean _bratwursts_. 😃 Do you prefer ham. Our mother shocked us one year by telling if it weren’t for us kids, she’d be eating ham. But I like turkey. If you must quickly defrost a turkey, do it in the refrig in a cold bucket of water. It should defrost on 7 hours. I know, I know, you can barely fit the turkey in yours, let alone a bucket. I usually use my ice cooler. I thaw it in there then place it in the refrig until I cook it. Since I either bag it or cook it in a covered roasting pan, a fifteen pounder shoulkd cook in 3 to 3.5 hours, even if stuffed and partiallyfrozen. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/54 "2004-11-24T21:57:29Z")
> [@Ms Boods](#): > > I spent time in Wales with distant relatives a couple of years ago, and for one supper, my cousin cooked a chicken. Couple of days later, we were getting ready in the morning to take a nice drive, and she suggested making up sandwiches from the leftover chicken. Fine with me! I like cold chicken sandwiches (although nothing beats cold pheasant, cheddar cheese, and butter and pepper…but I digress). > > Looked in the fridge for the bird, none to be found – I thought maybe her husband and son had finished it. Oh, no, was looking in the wrong place – after supper that first night, she did what she always did – put the rest of the chicken on the kitchen counter and covered it with a dishcloth, and the rest of the family picked on it, as usual with all the leftovers from every meal. > > Everything and anything I ate from then on out came sealed in a packet; I lived on bananas and Jaffa cakes (which I hate) for the next week and a half. Refrigeration \* d e l a y s \* the growth of bad organisms. That’s why you do it. A warm counter does not or worse, leaving it in the oven will accellerate the growth. I remember one thanksgiving at church, we left an \*extra \* cooked turkey in the refrig. but because it had been out on the counter for over six hours before being refriged, it was spoiled by sunday exacerbated by the fact in was still sitting in its juices stuffed. Ehh!! ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/55 "2004-11-24T22:00:00Z")
> [@Diogenes the Cynic](#): > > “Tofurkey is an abomination unto the Lord.” > > I’m pretty sure that’s in the Bible and if it isn’t, it’s an oversight. AMEN!!! And this is coming from someone who luvs both turkey and tofu!! ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/56 "2004-11-24T22:04:36Z")
> [@Fear Itself](#): > > I must say that your rigid avoidance of all things salmonella is going to bite you in the butt someday. Sooner or later, you will slip up and get a dose, and then your body will have no defenses. I practice somewhat lax sanitary practices in all aspects of my life, ensuring that I get small doses of salmonella, e. coli, and campylobacter every day. My immune system is toughened by frequent exposure, so I suffer no ill effects, even when I get a larger than normal dose. > > Face it, no matter how vigilant you are, sooner or later, you’re gonna be exposed, then you will suffer far worse than if you had not been so rigid about avoiding all bacteria exposure. Most cases of diarrhea are usually food poisoning. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/57 "2004-11-24T22:07:38Z")
> [@Casey1505](#): > > You’ll be washing your hands with hot water and antibacterial soap before and after handling the turkey, right? 😉 You can buy a gallon of concentrate disinfectant from any janitorial supply store for only $5. Good stuff, it also can be used for stinky sinks and laundry. ---
**Author:** ![Ms\_Boods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5e9695/32.png) [@Ms\_Boods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms_Boods)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/58 "2004-11-24T22:11:27Z")
> [@ouryL](#): > > Refrigeration \* d e l a y s \* the growth of bad organisms. That’s why you do it. A warm counter does not or worse, leaving it in the oven will accellerate the growth. > > I remember one thanksgiving at church, we left an \*extra \* cooked turkey in the refrig. but because it had been out on the counter for over six hours before being refriged, it was spoiled by sunday exacerbated by the fact in was still sitting in its juices stuffed. > > Ehh!! I ought to add that the overall level of filth in this kitchen contributed to my raiding the Jaffa cake box…this was also in the summer, and that chicken had been left on the counter for about 4 days… ---
**Author:** ![El\_Cid\_Viscoso](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/41988e/32.png) [@El\_Cid\_Viscoso](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Cid_Viscoso)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/59 "2004-11-24T22:18:43Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > Be diplomatic. Don’t be deceitful. I second this, duffer. If the turkey situation really bothers you, why don’t you buy a fresh bird and dispose of the thawing one as you see fit? ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2004, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433/60 "2004-11-24T22:21:20Z")
What’s done is done. There goes my rep as being perfect. 😛 I’ll eat the turkey and rave it was the best I’ve ever had. But if I’m not posting by Friday night, I’m going to haunt you all. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-eating-the-turkey-get-over-it/276433.md?page=4)