# I'm not giving up my seat **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 16, 2013, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431 "2013-01-16T22:34:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 23
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/441 "2013-01-18T17:41:13Z")
> [@Anonymous User](#): > > Exactly. Also, if you think about it, the late ones were probably already pissed about whatever caused **hem to get late**. This sentence was written today, in this very thread. I can not believe that part of your pitting was based on my writing errors. And lo and behold, who was recently pitted for writing errors? You! Project much? I have tried to explain myself several times, and I will do so again now. I struggle with dyslexia. I sincerely apologize for any writing errors. I am trying my best, and will continue to do so. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/442 "2013-01-18T17:42:38Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Without reading any further, I think we have evidence that you are completely lacking in grammatical skills, as well as social skills. Do you lack reading comprehension skills? Please read my last post, and every other post I have made pertaining to that issue. I have explained myself many times, apologized, and said I am trying. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/443 "2013-01-18T17:44:57Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > Do you lack reading comprehension skills? Please read my last post, and every other post I have made pertaining to that issue. I have explained myself many times, apologized, and said I am trying. I stopped reading the thread at that point. Sorry I didn’t continue to page 9. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/444 "2013-01-18T17:46:14Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > I stopped reading the thread at that point. Sorry I didn’t continue to page 9. It is not on page 9, but thanks for the snap judgment nonetheless. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Jeffrey\_Lebowski](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_jeffrey_lebowski/32/215_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Jeffrey\_Lebowski](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Jeffrey_Lebowski)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/445 "2013-01-18T17:48:58Z")
There are 445 replies in this thread. Many dopers have 50 replies per page. Looks like we’re about to hit page 10. ---
**Author:** ![Skypist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skypist/32/169_2.png) [@Skypist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skypist)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/446 "2013-01-18T17:56:00Z")
I think asking people to move is rude, and I don’t see the obligation to move if asked. It would be nice, but it’s not some kind of obligation. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/447 "2013-01-18T17:56:38Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > It is not on page 9, but thanks for the snap judgment nonetheless. What page is it on? If you tell me nicely, maybe I can move to it. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/448 "2013-01-18T18:00:13Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > What page is it on? If you tell me nicely, maybe I can move to it. The first mention is page 2. There are several other mentions as well. ---
**Author:** ![sachertorte](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sachertorte/32/3727_2.png) [@sachertorte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sachertorte)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/449 "2013-01-18T18:01:25Z")
I can accept people correcting grammar as a matter of constructive criticism, but to dismiss the OP as lacking social skills for using a very common grammar mistake, is bizarre. Quite classist actually. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/450 "2013-01-18T18:02:20Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > Could not have said it better. Simple tiny acts of courtesy help make life easier for everyone. And, yeah, that cold thing is such an obvious after the fact justification for rude behavior. If your that concerned about someone’s cold don’t go to the theater. > > God, I like this board, but it is so full of people who seem completely oblivious to basic human interactions. No kidding. Well some people are assholes, and some people aren’t, but we knew that already. I like how the assholes are stuck on, “Well I don’t have to move!” Nope, you sure don’t. You pretty much never have to do anything anyone asks you. You don’t have to give someone the time of day if they ask, you don’t have to hold anyone’s place in line real quick while they grab that jar off the shelf 10 feet away, you don’t have to hold anyone’s purse while they take off their sweater, hell, you don’t even have to get off your goddamn cell phone while placing your order with the barista, but refusal to extend these tiny little common courtesies is what makes you an asshole. Fine, you win the “But I Don’t Have To!” incorrigible little baby award. Congratulations on exercising your right to be a giant bitch. ---
**Author:** ![colander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@colander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colander)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/451 "2013-01-18T18:08:39Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > No kidding. Well some people are assholes, and some people aren’t, but we knew that already. I like how the assholes are stuck on, “Well I don’t have to move!” Nope, you sure don’t. You pretty much never have to do anything anyone asks you. You don’t have to give someone the time of day if they ask, you don’t have to hold anyone’s place in line real quick while they grab that jar off the shelf 10 feet away, you don’t have to hold anyone’s purse while they take off their sweater, hell, you don’t even have to get off your goddamn cell phone while placing your order with the barista, but refusal to extend these tiny little common courtesies is what makes you an asshole. Fine, you win the “But I Don’t Have To!” incorrigible little baby award. Congratulations on exercising your right to be a giant bitch. Hey, did you miss the part where they interrupted the movie? That is kind of a discourteous thing to do right off the bat. Why should one go out of their way to honor a discourteous demand? If the answer is “because I am afraid that if I don’t move, those people will start shouting at me and ruining everyone else’s movie” then I think we have established that those people are the ones who do not belong in a movie theater. ---
**Author:** ![duality72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duality72/32/3910_2.png) [@duality72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duality72)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/452 "2013-01-18T18:09:00Z")
OP did nothing wrong. > [@MsWhatsit](#): > > …the same as it being slightly rude if someone asks you if you can tell them the time, and you have a watch, but you say “nope” for no reason. WTF? Why would you do that? Maybe 15 people in a row just asked for the time and you’re tired of the interruptions. Maybe your mother died yesterday, she gave you the watch, and you can’t bear to look at it. Maybe you just lost your job and are barely avoiding a breakdown and you don’t want to risk blowing up on some random stranger. Maybe a sniper has you in his sights and will shoot you if you look at your watch. Maybe you’re enjoying the sun on your shoulders, the wind on your face, and you’re becoming one with the universe. Or maybe you’re just sitting comfortably in a theater trying to enjoy a movie. And you know what? None of that matters. When someone makes a polite request of you, the only thing you owe them is a polite response. You do not owe them an affirmative response, regardless of the relative discomforts involved, and you do not owe them a reason. That is the social obligation. Anything beyond that is gravy. That so many of us do more so much of the time is a credit to humanity, but we all have our moments where we feel we should put ourselves before others for whatever reason and we should be able to exercise them without explanation or harsh judgment. If your request, no matter how reasonable, is denied, accept it and move on. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/453 "2013-01-18T18:10:58Z")
> [@Damuri\_Ajashi](#): > > Wait, so there are 5 empty rows and a couple walk in AFTER the movie starts and tries to get people to move around and get pissy and abusive when people won’t accomodate them so they can get good seats for the movie they were late to when there are FIVE EMPTY FUCKING ROWS? > > FUCK EM. Good for you. And FUCK EM again. Spot on. And don’t forget, they texted throughout the movie. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/454 "2013-01-18T18:22:22Z")
> [@sachertorte](#): > > I can accept people correcting grammar as a matter of constructive criticism, but to dismiss the OP as lacking social skills for using a very common grammar mistake, is bizarre. Quite classist actually. I wasn’t saying she was lacking social skills due to bad grammar. ---
**Author:** ![Stately\_Greek\_Automaton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aca169/32.png) [@Stately\_Greek\_Automaton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stately_Greek_Automaton)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/455 "2013-01-18T18:25:09Z")
This whole situation is a clear indication of exactly what’s wrong with modern society. I mean, why the fuck did one of you not challenge the other to a duel or fisticuffs or something else of that nature? Spice the movie experience up a bit, since all those empty seats suggest it was pretty crappy otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/456 "2013-01-18T18:25:54Z")
> [@cerberus](#): > > Damned Internet People, disagreeing with me. [Someone is wrong on the internet!](http://xkcd.com/386/) ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/457 "2013-01-18T18:28:42Z")
> [@colander](#): > > Hey, did you miss the part where they interrupted the movie? That is kind of a discourteous thing to do right off the bat. Why should one go out of their way to honor a discourteous demand? If the answer is “because I am afraid that if I don’t move, those people will start shouting at me and ruining everyone else’s movie” then I think we have established that those people are the ones who do not belong in a movie theater. No, dickhead, you don’t do it because you’re afraid they’re going to shout at you; you do it not to be a dickhead. I’ve never told anyone the time because I was afraid of what they’d do if I didn’t. I tell them because giving them the answer isn’t hard and is the nice thing to do. The people acting like clowns afterward is, of course, beyond rude, but refusing to move in the first place is a jerk move too. Count me as one of the people who believes everyone in this scenario acted poorly. As for their being five minutes late, who cares? Yes, their lateness makes it slightly worse than it would have been had they made this request before the movie had started, but not enough so for me to refuse to move. Even if the movie had begun and someone asked if I’d move scooting down to Jack and Jill could sit next to each other, I’d just do it. Again, not to keep the peace (I’m operating under the assumption that if I say no, they won’t do anything but be annoyed), but because I’m not a fuckface. Be courteous. Not hard. And for the record (is anybody keeping records here?), I don’t buy this horse shit about being oh so concerned about public health, and that’s why she didn’t move over. She didn’t want him to sit next to Suzy Sick, but she was far too polite to sully Suzy’s good name by pointing out her sniffling. Mountainous loads of bullshit, that. I also don’t buy them standing in front of everyone making a huge scene. But let’s just say I buy the story as told: The original act of requesting OP please scoot so that they may sit next to each other is not rude. Everything else that followed, from bitchily refusing to do so to the screaming and texting, is. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/458 "2013-01-18T18:32:07Z")
…and I am a liar again. Because that is a good way to discredit me, right? :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/459 "2013-01-18T18:38:36Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > …and I am a liar again. Because that is a good way to discredit me, right? :rolleyes: Honestly, if you’d just give up on the whole “I was worried about getting sick!” excuse, you’d have 95% of us on board with you. Seriously, do you really think that 18 inches of extra distance really made a difference? If so, I have bad news for you about your toothbrush. It’s a dumb excuse, and it’s an obviously dumb excuse. Bullshit excuses are obvious whether they’re made by me, by my children, by the President of the United States, or by you. ---
**Author:** ![R3d\_Anonymous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/aeb1de/32.png) [@R3d\_Anonymous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/R3d_Anonymous)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2013, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/460 "2013-01-18T18:40:03Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > This sentence was written today, in this very thread. I can not believe that part of your pitting was based on my writing errors. And lo and behold, who was recently pitted for writing errors? You! Project much? > > I have tried to explain myself several times, and I will do so again now. I struggle with dyslexia. I sincerely apologize for any writing errors. I am trying my best, and will continue to do so. Well at least I don’t make the same mistake over and over again. And I am not pitting you for your poor writing skills anymore as you said that you have dyslexia. The pitting was based on… well maybe you could read it? You seriously think that was the basis of your pitting? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431.md?page=22) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431.md?page=24)