# I'm not giving up my seat **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 16, 2013, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431 "2013-01-16T22:34:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2013, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/41 "2013-01-16T23:49:05Z")
> [@Bob Ducca](#): > > I’m simply flabbergasted that you’re from New York City. In case anybody wonders why NYCers get a bad rap, point them to this thread. A couple of people cussing me out in a theater over a denied request make NYC look far worse than anything I did. I was not born in NYC, but whatever. Good way to generalize about an entire city. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2013, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/42 "2013-01-16T23:55:46Z")
> [@Rhiannon8404](#): > > They came late and there were actually seats available where no one would have to move to accommodate them? They should have sat in those seats. Yeah, if you’re asking people to do you a favor, you should have some sort of reason other than “I want it.” People sat where they sat because of the extra spaces, probably, so you only ask them to move when you have no real options, especially if you come in late. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2013, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/43 "2013-01-16T23:58:59Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Yeah, if you’re asking people to do you a favor, you should have some sort of reason other than “I want it.” People sat where they sat because of the extra spaces, probably, so you only ask them to move when you have no real options, especially if you come in late. For the record, we were some of the first people to arrive. When we originally sat in the row, it was empty, and then people sat around us, leaving space. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/44 "2013-01-17T00:00:02Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Yeah, if you’re asking people to do you a favor, you should have some sort of reason other than “I want it.” People sat where they sat because of the extra spaces, probably, so you only ask them to move when you have no real options, especially if you come in late. And thank you. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/45 "2013-01-17T00:01:39Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > For the record, we were some of the first people to arrive. When we originally sat in the row, it was empty, and then people sat around us, leaving space. That’s what I understood to have happened. So if someone wanted to shift you then fill in the empty seats, they are actually impacting lots of people in the row. And that’s fine when it’s a matter of simply having the space to sit down. It’s not fine when it’s a matter of getting a more choice seat. ---
**Author:** ![Otara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a88e4f/32.png) [@Otara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otara)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/46 "2013-01-17T00:02:15Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > So I am obligated to fulfill all requests that come my way? The word “no” should be scratched from my vocabulary? My comfort should always be less important than a late stranger, who, the horror, would not have a prime seat? > > Good to know. No, no and in this case, I’d say yes. The front row seats in most theatres aren’t just ‘non-prime’, they’re quite uncomfortable. You are arguing for a few seconds of movement so that other people would be uncomfortable for an entire movie. I don’t find it reasonable. You have a right to be unreasonable in soca, situations. people have a right to say they think you’re unreasonable. Otara ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/47 "2013-01-17T00:03:04Z")
> [@Asimovian](#): > > I don’t think it was wrong of them to ask you, but once you declined, that should have been the end of the story. You had no obligation to move under any circumstance I agree. The OP has an absolute right to be irritating, stubborn, and unhelpful for absolutely no reason. And I have a right to judge her for it. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/48 "2013-01-17T00:05:21Z")
> [@Otara](#): > > No, no and in this case, I’d say yes. The front row seats in most theatres aren’t just ‘non-prime’, they’re quite uncomfortable. You are arguing for a few seconds of movement so that other people would be uncomfortable for an entire movie. > > I don’t find it reasonable. You have a right to be unreasonable in soca, situations. people have a right to say they think you’re unreasonable. > > Otara Orata, I have sat in the 5th row in this very theater. Those seats are not uncomfortable. You would not even have to tilt your neck. Is there no saying they could of come slightly earlier to the film, and chosen any seat they wanted? ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/49 "2013-01-17T00:07:14Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > I agree. The OP has an absolute right to be irritating, stubborn, and unhelpful for absolutely no reason. And I have a right to judge her for it. Judge away. Just don’t come back and be rude to her face (and to the surrounding theater-goers, indirectly) as though she had an obligation to relocate in order to suit your choicest seating preference. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/50 "2013-01-17T00:07:08Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > I agree. The OP has an absolute right to be irritating, stubborn, and unhelpful for absolutely no reason. And I have a right to judge her for it. I owe these people nothing. They owe it to themselves to come not 5 minutes late, so they can get a seat to their liking. If I had just moved to avoid what have you, and they had texted through the whole film, then I would of been really pissed. ---
**Author:** ![polar\_bear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@polar\_bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/polar_bear)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/51 "2013-01-17T00:08:46Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > For the record, we were some of the first people to arrive. When we originally sat in the row, it was empty, and then people sat around us, leaving space. Completely irrelevant. You didn’t pay for 4 seats, so you should expect some people might want to get to the ‘good seats’ next to you. Denying the simple request to move 1 seat over is dickish (no matter when they showed up). Just in case you’re wondering, the fact you have been ill for a while doesn’t change this either (hope you are doing well now btw). ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/52 "2013-01-17T00:08:53Z")
> [@Asimovian](#): > > Judge away. Just don’t come back and be rude to her face (and to the surrounding theater-goers, indirectly) as though she had an obligation to relocate in order to suit your choicest seating preference. You perfectly captured how I felt, thank you. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/53 "2013-01-17T00:10:54Z")
> [@polar\_bear](#): > > Completely irrelevant. You didn’t pay for 4 seats, so you should expect some people might want to get to the ‘good seats’ next to you. Denying the simple request to move 1 seat over os dickish. > > Just in case you’re wondering, the fact you have been ill for a while doesn’t change this either (hope you are doing well now btw). They could of sat in those seats on our sides, and I would not said a word. It does, as I did not want to get sick again. But, there it is. As the other people ended up moving 5 minutes later, they could of just turned to them, after I refused. There were other scattered empty seats other than ours. And I am feeling better, thank you. ---
**Author:** ![myskepticsight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@myskepticsight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/myskepticsight)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/54 "2013-01-17T00:14:35Z")
I hate people who show up to the movies late. Watch a movie at home if you don’t care about the first 5 minutes. I probably would have moved because I don’t like confrontation, but I would have been pissed. If you have a serious personal NEED to sit in a certain spot, get your lazy ass to the theater on time. If you can’t, tough shit. Boo hoo. It won’t ruin your life to sit in shittier seats one time. Maybe it will teach you to leave the house a little earlier, eh? There is a new trend in my city of premium theaters with assigned seating. I’ve only been once so far (price is a premium too…but the seats are heated/huge, and they have liquor) but that part was wonderful. Bought the tickets on Fandango in advance and chose the seats I wanted. And STILL showed up early so I wouldn’t disturb other people. ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/55 "2013-01-17T00:17:14Z")
> [@myskepticsight](#): > > There is a new trend in my city of premium theaters with assigned seating. I’ve only been once so far (price is a premium too…but the seats are heated/huge, and they have liquor) but that part was wonderful. Bought the tickets on Fandango in advance and chose the seats I wanted. And STILL showed up early so I wouldn’t disturb other people. I go almost exclusively to a theater that allows this, as well. But when I was still going to the standard AMC/Edwards ilk, I got to the theater really early. And on the rare occasion I got to a movie fairly late, I wasn’t picky about where I sat. I cannot see myself interrupting someone else to ask them to move when there is open seating elsewhere. I’m not going to make it someone else’s problem. ---
**Author:** ![RaftPeople](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6f9a4e/32.png) [@RaftPeople](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RaftPeople)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/56 "2013-01-17T00:17:17Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > sorry you think I am a unreasonable though. Ah, the old “sorry you think”. The dishonest and manipulative way to say “I don’t care what you think”. Why not just be honest? As for the OP, given that you could have shifted 1 more seat away from the “cold” over to your SO’s empty seat, the “cold” excuse clearly could not possibly have been the real reason. Sounds like you were rude in that instance. ---
**Author:** ![Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimmy_Gibbler)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/57 "2013-01-17T00:19:53Z")
Were I the couple, I would have occupied each of the buffer and cut huge farts throughout the duration of the picture. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/58 "2013-01-17T00:21:36Z")
> [@RaftPeople](#): > > Ah, the old “sorry you think”. > > The dishonest and manipulative way to say “I don’t care what you think”. Why not just be honest? > As for the OP, given that you could have shifted 1 more seat away from the “cold” over to your SO’s empty seat, the “cold” excuse clearly could not possibly have been the real reason. Sounds like you were rude in that instance. I gave 3 reasons why I did not want to move, I don’t know why everyone thinks it was just that. Fine, we move away from the girl with the cold. We now have crappier seats, and less preferential view than we had before. Again, I am supposed to lose out for rude latecomers. ---
**Author:** ![Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimmy_Gibbler)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/59 "2013-01-17T00:22:15Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > I gave 3 reasons why I did not want to move, I don’t know why everyone thinks it was just that. > > Fine, we move away from the girl with the cold. We now have crappier seats, and less preferential view than we had before. Again, I am supposed to lose out for rude latecomers. Enjoy the SBDs. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/60 "2013-01-17T00:22:42Z")
> [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](#): > > Were I the couple, I would have occupied each of the buffer and cut huge farts throughout the duration of the picture. Good to know that there are even bigger jerks than them out there. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431.md?page=4)