# I'm not giving up my seat **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 16, 2013, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431 "2013-01-16T22:34:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/161 "2013-01-17T03:45:21Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > Sure. I regularly start threads like “Jews, Hitler and the Holocaust - who was in the wrong there?” Godwin!! Only took 4 pages. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/162 "2013-01-17T03:46:30Z")
> [@Brynda](#): > > Yes, not to mention that rewarding rude people encourages them to be continue to be rude. So the OP’s question was effectively who was being rude. Tricky. I know. Let’s _assume person A was rude_ and that way, since we can all agree that being rude is rude, we can conclude that person A was the one being rude! Yay, asked and answered! THIS! ---
**Author:** ![Brynda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Brynda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brynda)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/163 "2013-01-17T04:17:28Z")
Wow. Let me spell it out: IMHO, asking someone to move in a non-crowded theater is rude, especially if the movie has started. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/164 "2013-01-17T04:20:57Z")
> [@Brynda](#): > > Wow. Let me spell it out: IMHO, asking someone to move in a non-crowded theater is rude, especially if the movie has started. It really is a simple as that, isn’t it? 🙂 And getting belligerent since you don’t get your way, then texting and disturbing the people who did choose to move for you…Yep, these people are definitely going to be up for citizen of the year. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/165 "2013-01-17T04:21:41Z")
If they got there while the lights were still on, then the OP should try to accommodate them. People who come in after the movie has started–well first of all, they shouldn’t even be let in, but that’s another thing. At that point it’s too late. People are settled in, and it’s dark. You start moving around and it’s a hassle, and it disturbs not only the people moving, but people behind them and in front of them. If the movie has started, you take the bad seats in front and resolve to show up earlier next time. It is very rude to come in when the movie has started and start a commotion. It is not rude to refuse to move from your seat after the movie has started. I don’t even think it’s rude not to move before the movie has started, but it’s polite to accommodate at that point. But that’s not what happened. ---
**Author:** ![ladyfoxfyre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ad7895/32.png) [@ladyfoxfyre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ladyfoxfyre)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/166 "2013-01-17T04:22:20Z")
This thread just _screams_ “how can I tell a story where I am a complete asshole and get mad at everyone for calling me an asshole”. There must be a word for this. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/167 "2013-01-17T04:26:31Z")
> [@ladyfoxfyre](#): > > This thread just _screams_ “how can I tell a story where I am a complete asshole and get mad at everyone for calling me an asshole”. There must be a word for this. How exactly does “No, sorry” equal complete asshole? Really, I am supposed to give people what they want 100% of the time? Geez. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/168 "2013-01-17T04:29:07Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > For the sake of conversation, that’s why. Do you not have any curiosity in you at all? > > Next time, I will state in my OP. “I stand by what I did, and I still believe it to be right”. Just to make sure everything is crystal clear. :rolleyes: Yes. It doesn’t make for good opening posts if the IP states right off the bat that they are not open to any new ideas, different interpretations or any sort of discussion at all. Continuing to belabor this point only proves how untenable it is. Also, after reading further, I’m curious as to how many people defending the late-comers have also done the same thing and expected to be accommodated at all costs. I’m thinking there’s a lot of projection going on here at the expense of “But everyone does it, so I deserve a pass too!” ideologies. Interesting. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/169 "2013-01-17T04:30:41Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > Also, after reading further, I’m curious as to how many people defending the late-comers have also done the same thing and expected to be accommodated at all costs. I’m thinking there’s a lot of projection going on here at the expense of “But everyone does it, so I deserve a pass too!” ideologies. Interesting. I was wondering the same thing. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/170 "2013-01-17T04:32:04Z")
> [@RaftPeople](#): > > Necessary? This entire forum is unnecessary. > > But, the “sorry that you think” thing is something that annoys me. I find it as annoying as the OP found the request to move annoying. Thus my motivation to post. So, you posted something more about you than her. I see. ---
**Author:** ![Otara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a88e4f/32.png) [@Otara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otara)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/171 "2013-01-17T04:41:04Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > Also, after reading further, I’m curious as to how many people defending the late-comers have also done the same thing and expected to be accommodated at all costs. I’m thinking there’s a lot of projection going on here at the expense of “But everyone does it, so I deserve a pass too!” ideologies. Interesting. More the reverse, I’ve had people ask for me to shift over, and its never even occurred to me to say no as its a perfectly reasonable request with very minor work involved. I’m trying to think of myself asking, but can’t remember it coming up, let alone the outcome. We tend to get to films early. Otara ---
**Author:** ![Gestalt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/90ced4/32.png) [@Gestalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gestalt)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/172 "2013-01-17T04:42:21Z")
Well, it does seem like you started a thread to get opinions . . . and then you shot down every single opinion that wasn’t in agreement with your preconceived notions. The purpose of this thread is more, “let me defend myself as not being rude” rather than, “what do you think?” ---
**Author:** ![Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimmy_Gibbler)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/173 "2013-01-17T04:53:22Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > Really, I am supposed to give people what they want 100% of the time? Oh, so put upon … Get off the cross, you ain’t Jesus Christ. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/174 "2013-01-17T04:54:17Z")
> [@Gestalt](#): > > Well, it does seem like you started a thread to get opinions . . . and then you shot down every single opinion that wasn’t in agreement with your preconceived notions. > > The purpose of this thread is more, “let me defend myself as not being rude” rather than, “what do you think?” Yes, I should of understood. He had a backwards Knicks cap on. Maybe that was a coded message for his sadness over the Knicks not winning the NBA championships for decades. Hmmm… But really…I am not sure what I am to say…either you think I was in the right, or you think the guy was in the right. The deal is this. Do I think they were jerks for asking? No. Do I think I was a jerk for refusing? No. Both neutral on the jerk scale. But when they went on and on about it, and demanded they get what they want? Swearing and overreacting…then they became jerks. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/175 "2013-01-17T04:55:32Z")
> [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](#): > > Oh, so put upon … Get off the cross, you ain’t Jesus Christ. You seem very angry and borderline childish. Did you by any chance go to the movies in New York last night? ---
**Author:** ![Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimmy_Gibbler)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/176 "2013-01-17T04:57:07Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > You seem very angry and borderline childish. > > Did you by any chance go to the movies in New York last night? Did you get a fart in the face? Cause I’m as serious as a heart attack when I say that’s what I “would of” done. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/177 "2013-01-17T05:00:55Z")
> [@Kimmy\_Gibbler](#): > > Did you get a fart in the face? Cause I’m as serious as a heart attack when I say that’s what I “would of” done. I get it, you’re a childish, entitled, bully. That’s why you relate to these people so well. It all makes sense now… ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/178 "2013-01-17T05:00:56Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > Really, I am supposed to give people what they want 100% of the time? Yes. Yes, that’s exactly what everyone in this thread is saying to you. You’ve got it perfectly. Now you run along now before you suffer an unfortunate incident in which you are forced to admit actually understanding people’s posts. ---
**Author:** ![l1I235](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/179 "2013-01-17T05:02:25Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > Yes. Yes, that’s exactly what everyone in this thread is saying to you. You’ve got it perfectly. > > Now you run along now before you suffer an unfortunate incident in which you are forced to admit to understanding what people are saying to you. I am pretty sure when you go into Godwin territory, you automatically lose. And this thread is not a dogpile on me. There are plenty who agree with I did. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_T](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Gary\_T](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_T)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2013, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431/180 "2013-01-17T05:10:03Z")
> [@l1I235](#): > > Do I think they were jerks for asking? No. Do I think I was a jerk for refusing? No. Both neutral on the jerk scale. > > But when they went on and on about it, and demanded they get what they want? Swearing and overreacting…then they became jerks. I agree. It was reasonable for them to ask (once), and it was reasonable for you to refuse. It was not reasonable, or even defensible, for them to press the issue as they did. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-giving-up-my-seat/647431.md?page=10)