# I'm not your fucking girlfriend or JuanitaTech keeps it real **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 26, 2004, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576 "2004-03-26T15:03:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/21 "2004-03-26T17:53:12Z")
How’s the tummizzle, my nizzle? Got an itchizzle in the stichizzles? Just a ghetto version of Ubbi-Dubbi. Morphine or not, I’d slug that nurse. Generally speaking, if the patient is old enough to sign their own consent form, they ought to be addressed as Mr. / Ms unless the patient says “Oh, just call me Sally” When you’re in the hospital, wearing a gown that’s not large enough to cover anything and unable to get to the bathroom without help, you’re a bit low on dignity. Addressing patients politely helps maintain a tiny sliver, at least. And the “Hey dudes, want some wine?” guy? Otherwise impeccable service or not, I’d tell him quite simply and politely that if I wanted to be called “Dude” I’d have gone to the truckstop on I-5 and not a fine restaurant such as this one where I’m paying more for a bottle of wine than I paid to fill my car with gas. ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/22 "2004-03-26T20:06:03Z")
I call all animals buddy, especially strangers. Stray dog comes up wagging it’s tail: “Hey buddy… do you have a home?” I wouldn’t ever call a stranger or aquaintance ‘Buddy’ unless I was being sarcastic. “Hey buddy, you wanna stop stealing my car?” As for “you guys” I don’t have a problem with it if I’m in a bar and grill or a cheaper chain like an Applebee’s. If I’m spending money for a dining experience, though, you better call me ma’am. If you call me sir, you’re not getting a tip. What good are DDD breasts if you still get called sir? ---
**Author:** ![NicePete](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ee7513/32.png) [@NicePete](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NicePete)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/23 "2004-03-26T20:17:02Z")
> [@This Year's Model](#): > > Your last name is “shit”?!?! :eek: Errr, “shit” would be a noun or perhaps an interjection but clearly not an adjective. I’ll grant you that it’s monosyllabic. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/24 "2004-03-26T20:38:00Z")
When I was an interpreter in Immigration Court, I had to address the judge as Your Honor. Fine by me, except in return I would have been preferred not to be addressed as “Hon,” particularly in front of a full courtroom (and the particular judges I might not have minded calling me “hon” were never the ones who addressed me that way.) Same for attorneys, both private bar and INS: I have a first name and a last name, and if I address you as Mr. Lastname, please give me the courtesy of calling me Ms. Lastname in return. After all, it’s not like you don’t know my name; you see me nearly every day, and the judge has already stated my name for the record. It could have been worse, though, I suppose. Apparently one judge who had retired by the time I began working there was half-senile and could never remember the interpreters’ names, so he literally called one of them “Tutti-Frutti.” In court. On the record, with the tape recorder going. ---
**Author:** ![yellowval](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/919ad9/32.png) [@yellowval](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yellowval)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/25 "2004-03-26T20:49:14Z")
Ugh. That’s terrible. I have a co-worker who constantly refers to me and the other under-30 person in our office as “missy” or “lady.” I hate that. Then again, this is the same woman who can’t walk past the work table in the middle of our office without clicking her fingernails and jingling her bracelets on it. She needs to die. ---
**Author:** ![Susie\_Derkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Susie\_Derkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susie_Derkins)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/26 "2004-03-26T23:21:01Z")
> [@mouthbreather](#): > > While there’s no attempt at outside-of-your-race hipness here, it does irritate the shit out of me when people call me “buddy”. One guy at work does this all the time. My ex-husband does this! I always tried to get him to break the habit, but he didn’t see anything wrong with it. I thought it sounded rather condescending, myself. ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/27 "2004-03-26T23:41:17Z")
> [@Trunk](#): > > … usually preceeded with “what’s up” or “yo”. You’re so out of it. “Yo” goes at the end of sentences now. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/28 "2004-03-26T23:50:56Z")
Referring to people as “buddy” is stereotypically white. Just listen to black comics who mimic white guys. They always use “buddy”. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/29 "2004-03-26T23:53:26Z")
> [@AugestWest](#): > > Errr, “shit” would be a noun or perhaps an interjection but clearly not an adjective. I’ll grant you that it’s monosyllabic. “That was a shit movie we just saw.” 😃 Those swear words have multiple uses. Just ask [Monty Python](http://media.de.indymedia.org/media/2003/03/44621.mp3) (warning: mp3 file). Personally, i think being called by my first name would be far prefereable to being called “girlfriend.” Actually, as a general principle, i prefer to be called by my first name than being called Mr. mhendo. ---
**Author:** ![Heloise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e36b37/32.png) [@Heloise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heloise)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/30 "2004-03-27T00:16:03Z")
Hm. The black people haven’t yet told this ultracool and eternally hip mulatto what the next buzzword is. A little help, please. Oh, and the next time someone calls you a nickname you don’t like, if you say something along the lines of, “Wow, my ex-boyfriend’s hooker used to call people that,” they might stop. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/31 "2004-03-27T00:20:33Z")
> [@Trunk](#): > > At least the nurse didn’t say “how’s your abdomenizzle my nizzle?” It hurtizzles for shizzle! Can I have a pain pizzle? ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/32 "2004-03-27T01:41:59Z")
I always seem to get called “Chief”. I have NO idea why. While I do have a very, very, very, _very_ small couple of drops of Iroquois blood in me, I don’t look at all Native American. Considering that I’m half-Italian, you’d think they’d call me “Duce” instead… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/33 "2004-03-27T01:46:56Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > I always seem to get called “Chief”. I have NO idea why. While I do have a very, very, very, _very_ small couple of drops of Iroquois blood in me, I don’t look at all Native American. Considering that I’m half-Italian, you’d think they’d call me “Duce” instead… 🙂 Maybe they want to call you “chef” but keep misspelling it. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/34 "2004-03-27T01:56:32Z")
> [@SkipMagic](#): > > Maybe they want to call you “chef” but keep misspelling it. All I can say is that, unless they like Kraft macaroni and cheese, they’re gonna be mighty disappointed. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/35 "2004-03-27T02:01:47Z")
> [@Heloise](#): > > Hm. The black people haven’t yet told this ultracool and eternally hip mulatto what the next buzzword is. A little help, please. badunkadunk! ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/36 "2004-03-27T03:18:58Z")
> [@FilmGeek](#): > > What good are DDD breasts if you still get called sir? Wait a minute, you’re a woman? What?! Triple D, huh? As Spock would say, fascinating. (Too tired to take that any further) ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/37 "2004-03-27T04:21:05Z")
**Juanita** , you know I think you rock, so I just popped in to say that this is the funniest thread I’ve read all day! Would this nurse have been shocked to see that you _don’t_ drive a low-rider or an old Cadi with funky hydraulics? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/38 "2004-03-27T04:47:12Z")
I’m so square - it never occurred to me to talk to black people like I’m cool and pretending to be down with the hood (I can barely type that, let alone say it); I just talk to them like they’re people. Seems to be working well so far. Of course, this is Western Canada, where I saw my first black person at 12 years old. ---
**Author:** ![Nobody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/94ad74/32.png) [@Nobody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nobody)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/39 "2004-03-27T05:20:05Z")
At a job I once had, a long time ago, I had a boss, who didn’t like to be called “dude”. Why, because he’d say “That’s not my name.” OK, fair enough, **But** he would call me, and other employees “tiger” from time to time. Now tiger annoyed me, but at the time, I didn’t have the backbone to say “Please don’t call me that, it’s not my name.” Also, I’ve never liked “big guy”. Now I’m not short, nor am I large, I’m about average size, so if somebody calls me that, and thankfully that hasn’t happened for a long time, it’s not any kind of joke about my size. But when I have encountered it, it’s usually done by somebody who’s being condescending. Oh, and this thread reminded me something I saw when the place I work at now, use to have a cafeteria. On the board where the specials are usually written down, one day instead the server had written down something like “I have a name, and it’s not honey, sweetie, darling, or hey you. It’s (I forget now) please use it.” Yeah, yeah, now I’ll see jokes about her name being “I forget now” 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![BytopianDream](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9de0a6/32.png) [@BytopianDream](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BytopianDream)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2004, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576/40 "2004-03-27T06:40:49Z")
[http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com/testimonials.html](http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com/testimonials.html) “Johnny isn’t afraid to show he has a black friend because whenever he sees me in the hall he asks me Waaaazzzuup.” Gotta love the site. I’m sure you will find the comments there so on target. I try to educate my white brothers and sisters about this stuff. But sometimes they just don’t get it. “What do you mean I can’t be down?” _sigh_ I get sick of it as a white person. I can even _imagine_ how old this gets as a Person of Color. (One of these days, I’m gonna learn me how to code links. I swear.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-not-your-fucking-girlfriend-or-juanitatech-keeps-it-real/236576.md?page=1)