# I'm Officially Old **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 29, 2023, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279 "2023-08-29T12:32:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Si\_Amigo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/si_amigo/32/2877_2.png) [@Si\_Amigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Si_Amigo)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/41 "2023-08-30T11:53:04Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > Fortunately, we’re still at the “there’s room for two people” stage. We haven’t yet put a chair in there. You might want to try two people _ **and** _ a chair in there while you still can. ---
**Author:** ![Jasmine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jasmine/32/2964_2.png) [@Jasmine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jasmine)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/42 "2023-08-30T12:03:03Z")
Hey, when it is all said and done, you’re just one day older than yesterday! This society is horribly age biased. Don’t buy into it. ❤ ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 12:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/43 "2023-08-30T12:13:02Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Maybe I’m the exception, but I’ve never gone for an exam and had something diagnosed that I was not aware of. When my big toe was causing excruciating pain, I googled “big toe excruciating pain” and read about gout. I made an appointment to confirm. I woke up one morning wondering how in the hell I broke my big toe while sleeping. Yes it’s excruciating. But the drug Allopurinol has cleared that up. No problems at all now. Check it out. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/44 "2023-08-30T12:26:16Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > But the drug Allopurinol has cleared that up. No problems at all now. Check it out. Works for me, but it might not for everyone. Colchicine (another major gout preventer) didn’t work for me at all. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/45 "2023-08-30T12:35:25Z")
I’ve remained symptom free for years without medication or dietary changes. I drink beer and eat all the foods from the “NO” list. I just drink a ton of water to hopefully keep my uric acid levels in check. I discovered this “trick” by reading online about gout management in the face of beer culture. I made my initial gout appointment when my doctor was away. I saw one of the other doctors in the group who was a control freak. When I asked for recommendations on managing my gout while still enjoying beer, she freaked out on me. She actually said, “LISTEN TO ME!! NO MORE BEER. I’M TELLING, MOT ASKING!!” When I next saw my regular doctor, he told me she researched my records and attacked him at a meeting, telling everyone that he was not strict enough with his patients! ---
**Author:** ![Heracles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heracles/32/487_2.png) [@Heracles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heracles)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/46 "2023-08-30T13:06:07Z")
Years ago, a local stand-up comic did a show where he called old people _“Tamalous”_. The joke went on for a few minutes before he explained that it meant _“T’as mal où?”_, French for “Where are you hurtin’?”. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/47 "2023-08-30T14:41:58Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > Get a bunch of old folks together and pretty soon they’re bitchin’ about their health My Grandma (83) is like this, but I kind of can’t blame her? She’s had some wild shit happen to her healthwise despite being really impressively healthy for her age (her Garmin “fitness age” is 69 and every time we compete for steps, she smokes me.) She had shingles, then she had some kind of skin cancer on her head, and now she has to get regular shots _in her eyeball_ to slow macular degeneration. I’d be bitching about that too! ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/48 "2023-08-30T14:47:31Z")
> [@Spice\_Weasel](#): > > She had shingles, then she had some kind of skin cancer on her head, and now she has to get regular shots _in her eyeball_ to slow macular degeneration. I’d be bitching about that too! When I first saw the commercial for Vabysmo I was shocked when they mentioned that they injected it into your eye. I’ll bet a lot of people let that slip, but I caught it right away [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/6ze1atWARmI/maxresdefault.jpg "VABYSMO PRESCRIPTION MEDICINE COMMERCIAL | OPEN UP YOUR WORLD WITH VABYSMO | BLOCK WET AMD AND DME") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ze1atWARmI) ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/49 "2023-08-30T14:51:51Z")
Wow that brand name sounds too much like “abysmal.” Indeed. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/50 "2023-08-30T15:12:37Z")
I’m turning 59 in a few days, and I just had a bit of a scary wake-up call to start acting more my age. I work from home, and have an office in a 2nd floor loft area. There’s a hard wood staircase I go up and down several times a day. I heated up some leftover spaghetti and brought it up to my office to work through lunch. I decided I wanted more grated parmesan, so I grabbed the glass bowl I had nuked the spaghetti in, and holding it in both hands (so no holding the railing) started quickly going down the stairs. But on just the second step from the top I stumbled. I basically fell one stair step, coming down a little hard on my right heel, but I just managed to catch my balance and not fall any further. If I had lost my balance and tumbled down the stairs it would not have been pretty. Made me realize I need to start using the stairs like a 59 year old, not run up and down them like a 19 year old. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2023, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/51 "2023-08-30T22:49:08Z")
Funny, the doctors never tried to evaluate my mental age. Gotta go write that paper now. I really ought to investigate handholds in the shower. I used to use the spigot until the plumber warned me not to. Now I hang precariously on the door handle to the walk-in shower. I cannot get up from the floor without something to hang onto, like the seat of a chair. And stairs are problematic. I prefer railings on both sides, but I can deal with one-sided ones. I really am getting old. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/52 "2023-08-31T11:10:05Z")
Your officially old when you know where the bathrooms are in multiple hospitals. ---
**Author:** ![Si\_Amigo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/si_amigo/32/2877_2.png) [@Si\_Amigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Si_Amigo)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/53 "2023-08-31T11:50:25Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > you know where the bathrooms are in multiple hospitals. You also know that if you need to use a fairly clean bathroom while driving around that one of the safe bets is to pull right up to the front door of a hospital, park like you are picking someone up and go in and use a their bathroom. This also usually works with doctors offices, dentist offices and clinics. Only the young and inexperianced take a dump at a gas station or McDonalds. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/54 "2023-08-31T12:12:07Z")
I spent a lot of time taking my mom from doctor to doctor when she was senile, frail, and had a lot of other issues. They always asked her if she felt safe (often in front of me, which seemed inappropriate. Surely i could have been the unsafe person in her life) but they didn’t ask most of those questions. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/55 "2023-08-31T12:37:59Z")
> [@Si\_Amigo](#): > > You also know that if you need to use a fairly clean bathroom while driving around that one of the safe bets is to pull right up to the front door of a hospital, park like you are picking someone up and go in and use a their bathroom. Yup. I’ve done that. The one hospital has easy close parking. The other though, not so much. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/56 "2023-08-31T19:09:50Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > A free physical is something that I should take advantage of though. I currently don’t have a doctor so finding one who isn’t horrible (like the guy I went to for 20 years until he retired) is the first step. I rarely have symptoms. I discovered I had AFib when they rejected me when I was doing a blood donation. No symptoms, but if undiscovered it could have killed me. No symptoms for prostate cancer, now cured with no side effects. And it is really helpful to have a doctor who knows your history. ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/57 "2023-08-31T20:08:32Z")
I only go to one hospital, and a clinic, but I know where the bathrooms are in the areas I’ve spent time in. I used to know where the bathrooms were in most of the casinos in Vegas, but I suppose that’s not the same thing. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/58 "2023-08-31T20:51:32Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > > [@Si\_Amigo](#): > > > > You also know that if you need to use a fairly clean bathroom while driving around that one of the safe bets is to pull right up to the front door of a hospital, park like you are picking someone up and go in and use a their bathroom. > > Yup. I’ve done that. The one hospital has easy close parking. The other though, not so much. I recommend supermarkets for that. They tend to have cleaner bathrooms and more convenient parking than hospitals. And the prior visitor to the bathroom is less likely to have some infectious respiratory bug that might be lingering in the booth. ---
**Author:** ![Kropotkin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kropotkin/32/18045_2.png) [@Kropotkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kropotkin)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/59 "2023-08-31T22:10:36Z")
In my experience, allopurinol is the preventative and colchicine is used during an acute attack. Cite: my throbbing big toe! ---
**Author:** ![Kropotkin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kropotkin/32/18045_2.png) [@Kropotkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kropotkin)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2023, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279/60 "2023-08-31T22:16:01Z")
Get the bathroom railing! Most people get it after they fall and hurt themselves. The best way is to have an occupational therapist come by and check things out. This is particularly important if more than one person uses the bathroom and they are of significantly different heights. Then have a company that specia.izes in this work install the railings. Don’t even think about the suction cup ones or just screwing something into the wall. It’s expensive to do it right, but the alternative is to court disaster. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-officially-old/989279.md?page=4)