# I'm pitting this thread and I didn't even read it **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 7, 2007, 8:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102 "2007-06-07T08:40:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Kal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de053/32.png) [@Kal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kal)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/41 "2007-06-07T17:11:55Z")
Anyone who really does feel offended or disturbed by that thread’s title alone needs to get off the internet. ---
**Author:** ![Billdo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billdo/32/315_2.png) [@Billdo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billdo)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/42 "2007-06-07T17:15:25Z")
What I gravely object to is that the thread didn’t have “(TMI)” in the title. Imagine my surprise when I clicked on the thread expecting it to be heartwarming stories of kitty cats and bunny rabbits, but found out that it was actually about gross things that can happen when pooping. If we’re going to have these types of threads, they must be clearly labeled. ---
**Author:** ![Hung\_Mung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@Hung\_Mung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hung_Mung)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/43 "2007-06-07T17:32:11Z")
Y’know what? Let’s just ban the internet. The whole fucking thing. Then people wouldn’t have to think about other people having godawful discussions about vague, yet nasty, topics. Oh, and while we’re at it, can we ban homeless people from urban areas? I don’t want to think about them while I’m going to work. ---
**Author:** ![DiggitCamara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df788c/32.png) [@DiggitCamara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiggitCamara)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/44 "2007-06-07T17:42:30Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] So did yours, which I didn’t read either. In fact, I never read anything here. [/QUOTE] Hah! I beat you, hands down. I’m an analphabet! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/45 "2007-06-07T18:00:22Z")
[QUOTE=DiggitCamara] Hah! I beat you, hands down. I’m an analphabet! [/QUOTE] Oh yeah? Well, I don’t even have eyes! In fact, I have no head! In fact, I have no body at all! I’m just a gaseous bag of will. ---
**Author:** ![DiggitCamara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df788c/32.png) [@DiggitCamara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiggitCamara)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/46 "2007-06-07T18:13:30Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] Oh yeah? Well, I don’t even have eyes! In fact, I have no head! In fact, I have no body at all! I’m just a gaseous bag of will. [/QUOTE] Ah! _You_ are “The grossest thing that can happen while pooping”. Got it. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/47 "2007-06-07T18:30:16Z")
What did you say about my mother? :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/48 "2007-06-07T18:49:05Z")
Wait, there are _threads_ here? ---
**Author:** ![lowbrass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dc4da7/32.png) [@lowbrass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lowbrass)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/49 "2007-06-07T18:54:33Z")
Hmmm…this seems to be going well. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/50 "2007-06-07T18:55:45Z")
[QUOTE=lowbrass] Hmmm…this seems to be going well. :smack: [/QUOTE] Well, duh. After the **zuma** debaucle involving two separate Pit threads about similar issues, did you really expect otherwise? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Hildo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/bbce88/32.png) [@Johnny\_Hildo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Hildo)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/51 "2007-06-07T18:56:56Z")
[QUOTE=lowbrass] Currently in IMHO - “The grossest thing that can happen while pooping” I mean, really. [/QUOTE] Yeah, it sucks when your sensibilities get offended. Take me, for instance. Last week, there I was in the bus station mens room. I felt the need to poo (hey, 5 tacos and 11 cans of Blatz will do that to you). Just my luck, the toilet that I choose is hopeless clogged with someone’s bloody diarrhea. This guy must obviously have been scared to sit on the seat because he was no William Tell defecation-wise. His tawny brew was everywhere. It was on the seat, on the floor, on the wall. It smelled like a dead baby that had been left in a sauna for a week. Still, being somewhat hungry, I wondered what it tasted like. I scooped up a portion with my hand and put it in my mouth. I swished and gargled. It spoke to me of curry and brussell sprouts, quite different than my own bland diarrhea. When I finally decided to start chewing I was met with the sensation of multiple corn niblets exploding at once, like little cherry tomatoes. Suddenly, I remembered something my high school science teacher told me once. Eating someone else’s blood-tainted feces might make you sick. Damn, what a fool I was. I started to feel funny and then my mind drifted on the bloody diarrhea itself. What did I know about this bloody diarrhea? Nothing! For all I know, the guy who left me this gastronomic present may have just had gay anal sex. So on top of the blood AND poop, I could very well be eating someone’s tainted semen! I was feeling increasingly queasy and made it as far as the baby changing station before I horked all over it. Oh well, the next daddy that comes by should be used to wetknaps, I thought. So I went home and told my grandma about my ordeal. She gave me a stern talking to and then we fucked for three hours. Next morning, we went to Denny’s for breakfast. While helping myself to a toothpick, I detected no mint flavoring at all. WTF! I don’t want to taste wood, I want to taste minty wood. Fucktards. So yes, lowbrass, I feel your pain. ---
**Author:** ![lowbrass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dc4da7/32.png) [@lowbrass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lowbrass)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/52 "2007-06-07T18:59:20Z")
[QUOTE=Hung Mung] Grow the fuck up. You did the right thing by not reading it or thread-shitting in it, but if you’re going to Pit it, be a little more creative. Your OP sucks. [/QUOTE] Sorry. Fucktard, asshat, meh, the stupid it burns!!!11!!! that thread suxxors, poop. Better? ---
**Author:** ![lowbrass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dc4da7/32.png) [@lowbrass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lowbrass)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/53 "2007-06-07T19:00:21Z")
Johnny - I’m not listening - la, la, la, la… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/54 "2007-06-07T19:04:04Z")
[QUOTE=Johnny Hildo] Yeah, it sucks when your sensibilities get offended. Take me, for instance. Last week, there I was in the bus station mens room. I felt the need to poo (hey, 5 tacos and 11 cans of Blatz will do that to you). Just my luck, the toilet that I choose is hopeless clogged with someone’s bloody diarrhea. This guy must obviously have been scared to sit on the seat because he was no William Tell defecation-wise. His tawny brew was everywhere. It was on the seat, on the floor, on the wall. It smelled like a dead baby that had been left in a sauna for a week. Still, being somewhat hungry, I wondered what it tasted like. I scooped up a portion with my hand and put it in my mouth. I swished and gargled. It spoke to me of curry and brussell sprouts, quite different than my own bland diarrhea. When I finally decided to start chewing I was met with the sensation of multiple corn niblets exploding at once, like little cherry tomatoes. Suddenly, I remembered something my high school science teacher told me once. Eating someone else’s blood-tainted feces might make you sick. Damn, what a fool I was. I started to feel funny and then my mind drifted on the bloody diarrhea itself. What did I know about this bloody diarrhea? Nothing! For all I know, the guy who left me this gastronomic present may have just had gay anal sex. So on top of the blood AND poop, I could very well be eating someone’s tainted semen! I was feeling increasingly queasy and made it as far as the baby changing station before I horked all over it. Oh well, the next daddy that comes by should be used to wetknaps, I thought. So I went home and told my grandma about my ordeal. She gave me a stern talking to and then we fucked for three hours. Next morning, we went to Denny’s for breakfast. While helping myself to a toothpick, I detected no mint flavoring at all. WTF! I don’t want to taste wood, I want to taste minty wood. Fucktards. So yes, lowbrass, I feel your pain. [/QUOTE] That, sir, is unpleasant. Repellant, even. I’d rate it at eight squirming maggots out of ten. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/55 "2007-06-07T19:14:26Z")
[QUOTE=Johnny Hildo] So yes, lowbrass, I feel your pain. [/QUOTE] That sure is a funny way of spelling “The Aristocrats!” ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/56 "2007-06-07T19:17:08Z")
[QUOTE=lowbrass] Fucktard, asshat, meh, the stupid it burns!!!11!!! that thread suxxors, [/QUOTE] Uh huh. > [@](#): > > poop. Eww! ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/57 "2007-06-07T19:19:48Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] I did read it, and I read this one, too. This thread is a bigger waste of bandwidth than the thread you’re pitting, **lowbrass**. Are you a troll? Are you not finding the level of entertainment here up to your fine standards? Do you think the world should change to accommodate you? Are you 12? Do we need to post the phrase, “IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT, DON’T READ IT.” as a stickie in every forum? Does someone need to come visit you and **zuma** and tattoo that phrase on your foreheads? Do we need to add to that phrase - “IF YOU DON’T EVEN BOTHER READING IT, DON’T BOTHER COMPLAINING ABOUT IT.”? [/QUOTE] I sense a movement. ---
**Author:** ![Borborygmi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/borborygmi/32/217_2.png) [@Borborygmi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Borborygmi)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/58 "2007-06-07T19:52:55Z")
I’m pitting the Indus script, even though I didn’t read it. I mean, really. ---
**Author:** ![lowbrass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dc4da7/32.png) [@lowbrass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lowbrass)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/59 "2007-06-07T19:53:20Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] I did read it, and I read this one, too. This thread is a bigger waste of bandwidth than the thread you’re pitting, **lowbrass**. Are you a troll? Are you not finding the level of entertainment here up to your fine standards? Do you think the world should change to accommodate you? Are you 12? Do we need to post the phrase, “IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT, DON’T READ IT.” as a stickie in every forum? Does someone need to come visit you and **zuma** and tattoo that phrase on your foreheads? Do we need to add to that phrase - “IF YOU DON’T EVEN BOTHER READING IT, DON’T BOTHER COMPLAINING ABOUT IT.”? I don’t know why I’m even bothering to post in this thread. I must be dead bored. [/QUOTE] You seem angry. 'Taint that big a deal - the title grossed me out is all. Can’t really forego reading the title, since it’s right there on the page. Don’t let it ruin your day, o.k.? Not sure you know what “troll” means. You either, Lute. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2007, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102/60 "2007-06-07T20:01:55Z")
[QUOTE=lowbrass] Sorry. Fucktard, asshat, meh, the stupid it burns!!!11!!! that thread suxxors, poop. Better? [/QUOTE] No, sorry, but that joke’s almost as old as the forum. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-pitting-this-thread-and-i-didnt-even-read-it/407102.md?page=4)