# I'm scared. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 3, 2015, 9:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696 "2015-04-03T09:09:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2015, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/81 "2015-04-04T18:00:19Z")
**Skald** I love you, man! Our thoughts are with you. Please keep telling us what _you_ are thinking. ---
**Author:** ![FeAudrey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7feea3/32.png) [@FeAudrey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FeAudrey)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2015, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/82 "2015-04-04T18:29:46Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > … Lots of nightmares … Tell your doctors; could be a medication side-effect, fixable with a change to whatever they are giving you. > [@](#): > > Sorry if I’m being self-indulgent or self-pitying. I feel hopeless. Know I shouldn’t. I’m in a hospital with family and doctors and friends but it hardly seems to matter. Hang in there. Look at all the messages here that reference threads and memes that you’ve put up, and have drawn huge numbers of views – you count with a lot of us. ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2015, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/83 "2015-04-04T21:00:58Z")
**Skald,** I agree that the nightmares as well as your feelings of hopelessness are likely medication-based. When I was in the hospital and on Ketamine, I had hallucinations about being buried in coffee beans and donuts. I’m NOT kidding! That actually was pretty cool, but it morphed into my being in the center of a spinning grey-carpeted drum or barrel. Vertigo. Once I was off the Special K (street name), that all disappeared. ---
**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2015, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/84 "2015-04-04T21:16:44Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Less pain last night and today thus far. BP still too high. More tests. No appetite. Wife went home to shower. Irrationally mad at her for that. > > Lots of nightmares. I dreamt I was riding in the car with my wife driving and the babies in back to my brother’s funeral when we got sideswiped, and the guy who hit us got out of his car and came to ours and waved a gun and took the babies. My wife was unconscious and I couldn’t move to save them but I knew it was because I was a coward. Then i dreamed my father had died and I was arguing with my sister over how to sell his belongings at a yard sell. Then we were at dad’s funeral, at which mother was present though she’s been dead since 2006, and this little kid kept the running around making a mess but no one but my cared. > > Sorry if I’m being self-indulgent or self-pitying. I feel hopeless. Know I shouldn’t. I’m in a hospital with family and doctors and friends but it hardly seems to matter. I am a fully growed human. Every so often, the protagonists of my old nightmares turn up in my sleep – notable recurring horrors are The Blob and Christopher Lee, usually in his old turn as Hammer’s Dracula. (He did turn up, once, as Count Dooku). And as a fully growed human, in my dreams, sometimes I laugh at them. Other times I greet them like old friends of my youth. But they don’t scare me, and haven’t for a long time. Especially Count Dooku. But I am here to tell you that I had the worst dreams in years, last time I spent the night in hospital. I don’t remember what they were, but I do remember being utterly terrified. I’d have been HAPPY to see something as benign as Dracula… Get out of there once they get you stable. A hospital is no place for sick people. ---
**Author:** ![mbh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a6a055/32.png) [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2015, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/85 "2015-04-04T21:49:44Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Sorry if I’m being self-indulgent or self-pitying. Not a problem. Get well. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2015, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/86 "2015-04-04T22:02:35Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Sorry if I’m being self-indulgent… Well, we’re used to that. 😉 Another vote for the nightmares being partially medically induced, and for hospitals being a breeding ground for nightmares. And those beds are uncomfortable. ETA: The good news is that they will eventually throw your malingering ass out on the street, though I know it won’t be soon enough for you. Just stay away from the Hallmark Channel. World conquerors don’t need that shit. ---
**Author:** ![Lorene89095](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@Lorene89095](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lorene89095)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2015, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/87 "2015-04-04T22:12:23Z")
There’s a new kind of drug resistant Shegella … (sorry for spelling) Those nightmares come with hospitals and medications ---
**Author:** ![janis\_and\_c0](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/janis_and_c0/32/21_2.png) [@janis\_and\_c0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/janis_and_c0)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/88 "2015-04-05T00:02:38Z")
Praying for you\*\* Skald\*\* my friend. Hang in there. \<3 ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/89 "2015-04-05T00:14:44Z")
Good luck. ---
**Author:** ![Civil\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d78d45/32.png) [@Civil\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Civil_Guy)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/90 "2015-04-05T00:17:55Z")
If there’s any special supplications you’d like us to make to Athena, just let us know. Get better soon, friend and future overlord. Okay, those might be a little contradictory, but who frikkin’ cares about details at a time like this. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/91 "2015-04-05T03:04:34Z")
Glad to hear Thanatos has decamped, **Skald**! Every step forward is a step in the right direction. Talk to your doc about the nightmares and meds. Get some good rest. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/92 "2015-04-05T03:29:49Z")
Am praying for you, Skald, and sending good vibes your way! Tomorrow is Easter Sunday. Believe it, miracles do happen. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/93 "2015-04-05T04:09:53Z")
Kick its ass, man. And assume the negative feelings are outside effects right now, not something you should let drag you down. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/94 "2015-04-05T13:22:44Z")
Okay. Starting Day Four. I think. Feels longer. Slept better. If I had nightmares I don’t remember them. Gastrointestinal problems subsided. Legs aching. Hopefully my blood pressure will be low enough that they’ll send me home. I miss the kids. I need to see my babies and hold them. It feels like they’re going to drift away from me. I know it’s only been a few days and that must sound crazy but that’s how I feel. And I’m out of juice again. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/95 "2015-04-05T13:36:11Z")
Hang in, man, we’re pulling for you. ---
**Author:** ![ASanders](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asanders/32/3367_2.png) [@ASanders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASanders)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/96 "2015-04-05T13:51:55Z")
> [@Streetsinger](#): > > I don’t usually post, but from your stories you’ve long been one of my favorite people on the board. Whatever you may have in your past, I know you now as a brilliant, funny, perceptive, generous, and compassionate person. Your children are going to be proud all their lives that you’re theirs. > > I hope you feel better soon. Exactly. Good thoughts from this small corner of the internet. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/97 "2015-04-05T13:58:13Z")
Life, (near) death, rebirth. **Skald** , you know the legends, the archetypes. You’re being transmogrified! I await your final form! [sub]get well soon[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![aceplace57](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aceplace57/32/3500_2.png) [@aceplace57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aceplace57)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/98 "2015-04-05T13:59:18Z")
Hang in there Skald. I always enjoy your posts and look forward to seeing more in the future. ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e4f/32.png) [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_is_the_new_Analog)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/99 "2015-04-05T14:12:58Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Life, (near) death, rebirth. **Skald** , you know the legends, the archetypes. You’re being transmogrified! > > I await your final form! > > [sub]get well soon[/sub] Now _I’m_ scared! Happy update, **Skald**. Keep 'em coming! ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [April 5, 2015, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696/100 "2015-04-05T15:41:46Z")
I’ve been following all along, and hoping to hear good news. It’s sounding better. I hope that trend continues and that you’re home with your wife and children real soon now, with a diagnosis that lets you follow a treatment plan to a full and happy recovery. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-scared/716696.md?page=6)