# im so short....getting depressed **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 18, 2006, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204 "2006-05-18T01:32:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![SkeptiJess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@SkeptiJess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkeptiJess)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/61 "2006-05-18T20:17:49Z")
[QUOTE=Anne Neville] No! Don’t do that! I’m 5’3", and need somebody to be shorter than me. [/QUOTE] Well, my almost 19 year old daughter is 4’9," so she fits the bill. Not that I’m saying that we wouldn’t all miss **Viridiana** if she killed herself! ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/62 "2006-05-18T21:08:12Z")
**peachpit** , I’m a 46-year old man, and the same height as you. Unlike most men my height, I’ve never really wished I were taller. I would like to offer the following thoughts: - Practicing a sport in which height isn’t an advantage is a good builder of physical confidence, which will benefit you socially and professionally. Where I grew up, basketball was the prevailing sport, but I drifted into weightlifting and bodybuilding. - Yes, more women prefer tall guys than short guys. And yes, women are more likely than men to prefer a specific ‘type’ in a mate than men are. (Click [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=5692033&highlight=type+magnitude#post5692033) for my elaboration on this, aka, “Shakespeare on Love” 😉 ) But this can work to your advantage too: if even 10% of women have you as their your overall type, that still means _plenty_ of very attractive, desirable women out there would prefer you. Focus on connecting with such women, and don’t sweat the ones who prefer other types of guys. ---
**Author:** ![peachpit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d2c977/32.png) [@peachpit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peachpit)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/63 "2006-05-18T21:28:35Z")
[QUOTE=F. U. Shakespeare] **peachpit** , I’m a 46-year old man, and the same height as you. Unlike most men my height, I’ve never really wished I were taller. I would like to offer the following thoughts: - Practicing a sport in which height isn’t an advantage is a good builder of physical confidence, which will benefit you socially and professionally. Where I grew up, basketball was the prevailing sport, but I drifted into weightlifting and bodybuilding. -. [/QUOTE] ya, sports is a good way…but why do all short guys do bodybuilding? its like the typical “i have to compensate” thing, and as a previous person said it just looks weird to see a little ripped dude…i dunno…im skinny so that wouldnt work anyway… ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/64 "2006-05-18T21:54:26Z")
[QUOTE=Jess] Well, my almost 19 year old daughter is 4’9," so she fits the bill. Not that I’m saying that we wouldn’t all miss **Viridiana** if she killed herself! [/QUOTE] I need as many people shorter than me as I can get. So don’t kill yourself if you’re shorter than me- I forbid it 😃 ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/65 "2006-05-18T22:18:46Z")
[QUOTE=peachpit] ya, sports is a good way…but why do all short guys do bodybuilding? its like the typical “i have to compensate” thing, and as a previous person said it just looks weird to see a little ripped dude…i dunno…im skinny so that wouldnt work anyway… [/QUOTE] It’s a matter of degree: there’s a difference between being a ripped, roided, ridiculously tanned freak demanding attention and being the little guy who opened the jar that the football player couldn’t. And FWIW, I’m naturally skinny too: I weigh about 165 pounds, and would probably weigh around 130-140 if I didn’t lift: a thin frame can look surprisingly different with a little added muscle. Also, when I was your age, competitive bodybuilding didn’t have the insecure, “Look at me!!! I’m an EXTREME FREAK!!!” vibe that it does today. Arnold discussed this in the book “Pumping Iron”: he noted the way mediocre bodybuilders dressed to show off their muscles (unlike him, who dressed to look like old money), and likened it to the fact that Ferrari owners didn’t challenge other cars to drag. Like I said, it’s about having more confidence. Anyway, I don’t mean to exclusively recommend bodybuilding: I’m sure there are lots of sports you can excel at. ---
**Author:** ![SkeptiJess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@SkeptiJess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkeptiJess)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/66 "2006-05-18T22:23:56Z")
[QUOTE=peachpit] ya, sports is a good way…but why do all short guys do bodybuilding? its like the typical “i have to compensate” thing, and as a previous person said it just looks weird to see a little ripped dude…i dunno…im skinny so that wouldnt work anyway… [/QUOTE] There are other sports, too, that don’t require height. My son spent a couple of seasons on his high school wrestling team, for instance. I wouldn’t think you’d need height for baseball, either. I don’t really know why so many shorter guys get into weight lifting – it may be an overcompensation thing for some. Or it could be that, like my son, it’s a way of being _big_ when you can’t be tall. It’s easy to be overlooked if you are small. As for short buff guys looking odd – I disagree. I think a nicely built man of any height looks great. I do agree with the person earlier who said that you do need to keep your proportions in mind – you wouldn’t want to end up as wide as you are tall. Some guys (of all heights) also overwork parts of their bodies and underwork others, which can lead to an odd look. Nick used to work out with a guy who _never_ worked his legs – he did upper body stuff exclusively. He had a _huge_ chest, neck and arms and chicken legs. _He_ looked odd, all right! And, if you are interested in starting to work out, I don’t think starting out skinny will be a problem. Nick was a twig when he got started. [Here](http://img210.imageshack.us/my.php?image=nick26eu.jpg) is a photo of him at 17, after 3 years of weight training. Ignore the silly pose (he was imitating a photo of Arnold Shwartzenager). ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/67 "2006-05-18T22:31:58Z")
[QUOTE=wolf\_meister] The campaign managers of “Dubya” Bush realized this and tried to avoid his being near John Kerry (the taller candidate). Notice they weren’t situated side by side in the debates? [/QUOTE] The cameras tried to help them out, although I thought the technique failed miserably. If you watched the debates, the camera was obviously much closer to Bush than it was to Kerry. If you couldn’t tell that Kerry was much taller (five inches), you weren’t looking at the lecterns. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![MLS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/919ad9/32.png) [@MLS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MLS)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/68 "2006-05-18T22:33:44Z")
I had a teacher in college who was really short. Like about 5’ 2" short. He told a story about being in Texas, where someone asked him how a little guy like him felt about being out there with all the big strapping Texas-sized fellas. “Like a dime among nickels.” ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/69 "2006-05-18T22:40:17Z")
**peachpit** , I stopped growing aged 16. I’m 5’6" 1/2 (the HALF is very important). I spent several years of my adolescence same as you. I even begged my parents to pay for leg-stretching surgery - they refused, of course. Then I stopped thinking about it, and went out into the world, and holy shit, it didn’t matter at all. I’ve never had much of a problem getting women, of whom about 50% have been taller than me. And now I’m married, and my wife is nearly 6’ tall - though I have to admit our wedding photos look ridiculous. Women who say they only want a man who is 5’11" are just responding to surveys: in the real world, they haven’t met you yet. ---
**Author:** ![SkeptiJess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@SkeptiJess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkeptiJess)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/70 "2006-05-18T22:49:41Z")
[QUOTE=MLS] “Like a dime among nickels.” [/QUOTE] ::laughs:: I _love_ that! I’m going to pass it along to my daughter – she gets the “How do you feel being the shortest person in the room?” question a lot. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/71 "2006-05-18T22:58:10Z")
[QUOTE=jjimm] my wife is nearly 6’ tall - though I have to admit our wedding photos look ridiculous. [/QUOTE] Wedding photos can look ridiculous even if the groom is taller than the bride. Ours do, because Mr. Neville and I are some of the least photogenic people in existence. I also foolishly listened to the photographer when he told me to take off my glasses for some of the pictures. I can’t focus on anything more than about a foot away without them, so I look pretty stoned in a lot of my wedding pictures. ---
**Author:** ![peachpit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d2c977/32.png) [@peachpit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peachpit)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/72 "2006-05-18T23:09:39Z")
[QUOTE=Jess] There are other sports, too, that don’t require height. My son spent a couple of seasons on his high school wrestling team, for instance. I wouldn’t think you’d need height for baseball, either. And, if you are interested in starting to work out, I don’t think starting out skinny will be a problem. Nick was a twig when he got started. [Here](http://img210.imageshack.us/my.php?image=nick26eu.jpg) is a photo of him at 17, after 3 years of weight training. Ignore the silly pose (he was imitating a photo of Arnold Shwartzenager). [/QUOTE] he couldnt have been that “twigish”. he looks pretty well built to being with. i could never look like that if i worked out the rest of my life! and he doesnt look too short either ---
**Author:** ![ultrafilter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/3d9bf3/32.png) [@ultrafilter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultrafilter)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/73 "2006-05-18T23:15:43Z")
[QUOTE=peachpit] he couldnt have been that “twigish”. he looks pretty well built to being with. i could never look like that if i worked out the rest of my life! and he doesnt look too short either [/QUOTE] You may want to read [this](http://www.t-nation.com/findArticle.do?article=06-036-training) and look at some of the pictures of the author before you give up. ---
**Author:** ![SkeptiJess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@SkeptiJess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkeptiJess)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/74 "2006-05-18T23:25:32Z")
[QUOTE=peachpit] he couldnt have been that “twigish”. he looks pretty well built to being with. i could never look like that if i worked out the rest of my life! and he doesnt look too short either [/QUOTE] He really was a twig at age 15 – around 115 lbs, and 5’6" or so. That ‘built’ picture was taken at almost 18 – he’d been working out for 3 years, had grown a couple of inches and gained 50 or so pounds. BTW, you can’t see in the picture, but he has _enormous_ calves. Know why? Because he was so self conscious about his height, he started walking on tiptoes when he was 15! Not full tiptoes – just with his heels a bit off the ground. He didn’t get out of that habit until boot camp (he’s now in the Navy) – you can’t march on tiptoes! ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2006, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/75 "2006-05-18T23:44:40Z")
[QUOTE=Jess] And, if you are interested in starting to work out, I don’t think starting out skinny will be a problem. Nick was a twig when he got started. [Here](http://img210.imageshack.us/my.php?image=nick26eu.jpg) is a photo of him at 17, after 3 years of weight training. Ignore the silly pose (he was imitating a photo of Arnold Shwartzenager). [/QUOTE] Lift weights if you like. But please don’t imitate Arnold Schwarzenegger- one bad governor like him is enough for California, ok? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![peachpit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d2c977/32.png) [@peachpit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peachpit)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2006, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/76 "2006-05-19T00:39:12Z")
[QUOTE=Anne Neville] Lift weights if you like. But please don’t imitate Arnold Schwarzenegger- one bad governor like him is enough for California, ok? 😉 [/QUOTE] i doubt im gonna start really being a weightlifter, but i can promise you ill never look like arnold ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2006, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/77 "2006-05-19T02:10:20Z")
I haven’t read all the posts in this thread, but would like to say that two of my sons are shorter than most and they both: –have amazing senses of humor –are brilliantly talented musically –have copious amounts of wild monkey sex –have excellent jobs and lots of friends –did I mention the sex? Bottom line is: they are able to laugh at themselves if necessary, which disarms anyone poking fun at them; they carry themselves proudly and take second chair to nobody; they’ve both involved themselves in martial arts to gain physical and mental confidence. Your life is what you make of it. ---
**Author:** ![peachpit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d2c977/32.png) [@peachpit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peachpit)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2006, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/78 "2006-05-19T02:21:55Z")
[QUOTE=Chefguy] I haven’t read all the posts in this thread, but would like to say that two of my sons are shorter than most and they both: –have amazing senses of humor –are brilliantly talented musically –have copious amounts of wild monkey sex –have excellent jobs and lots of friends –did I mention the sex? Bottom line is: they are able to laugh at themselves if necessary, which disarms anyone poking fun at them; they carry themselves proudly and take second chair to nobody; they’ve both involved themselves in martial arts to gain physical and mental confidence. Your life is what you make of it. [/QUOTE] well im not exactly looking to have copious ammounts of wild monkey sex…but thanks for the encouragment…i think… ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2006, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/79 "2006-05-19T02:34:52Z")
[QUOTE=Jess] I don’t really know why so many shorter guys get into weight lifting – it may be an overcompensation thing for some. Or it could be that, like my son, it’s a way of being _big_ when you can’t be tall. It’s easy to be overlooked if you are small. [/QUOTE] True. But there’s another reason: leverage. All other factors being equal, the shorter of two people will be able to lift more. (I’m oversimplifying some). ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2006, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204/80 "2006-05-19T04:50:43Z")
My husband is 5’8", and is the tallest person in his family. He is two inches taller than I am, and it’s absolutely great - we never have to adjust car seats or mirrors, stuff fits both of us if it fits one of us, kissing, hugging, holding hands, all are so easy. We have a friend who is quite tall (6’4", I think), and he had to give up a very cheap, good car when he needed one because he simply didn’t fit in it. It’s not all roses and sunshine on the other side, either. So many have said it already, and I’ll say it again for emphasis - with 6 billion people in the world, I _guarantee_ you there are tons of people who are looking for exactly what you are. I personally like skinny, buck-toothed guys (seriously - I think that’s hot). I have a friend who like guys with a missing front tooth. Ask everybody on the Dope, and every single one will like something that other people think is odd. Just relax, and enjoy being young and debt-free. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-so-short-getting-depressed/357204.md?page=5)