# "I'm sorry for what happened." **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 6, 2006, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187 "2006-02-06T04:51:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![rinni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f6c823/32.png) [@rinni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rinni)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2006, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/21 "2006-02-07T21:02:26Z")
> [@Anastasaeon](#): > > \ > _He threatened me with friendship_! > \ I honestly misread that as “He threatened me with Photoshop!” and I just thought everyone needed to know this. **KCSuze** , all things considered you are taking it well! Ignore her so hard she doesn’t know what hit her. “I’m sorry for what happened”? No. More like, "I’m sorry I look like the bad guy here and I want to be perceived as “nice” after the fact. No. Good on you for being strong! Jeez. Dumping someone via offline messages on Yahoo. Gah. I mean, dumping someone over messenger is bad enough when they can respond, but if they’re offline? That is just bad. That is wimpy. Wimpy to the nth degree. Re: the linked thread, “cherry on the crap parfait”. Ha! That was an awesome line, even if it was borne form a non-awesome situation. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2006, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/22 "2006-02-07T21:08:07Z")
See, this is why people [hate the passive voice](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=357485). ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/23 "2006-02-08T00:40:44Z")
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. Y’all rock. I got more offline messages from her saying she’s crying and lonely and misses me. Strangely enough, that doesn’t make me feel good. As mad as she made me, as deeply as she hurt me, I don’t want her to suffer. That is, of course, if she really is suffering. All I know is that I just can’t be with her any more. And that’s a hard realization to come to. _sigh_ Anyway, thank you all so much for your responses. I posted this update thread so I could get confirmation of what my head was telling me. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/24 "2006-02-08T01:03:50Z")
> [@anyrose](#): > > But also it could be that she just got dumped by someone else and it woke her up - to which I say “good”. (remember the songs “Goody Goody” or “Hats Off To Larry”) In light of the latest update, I’m thinking this is a likely possibility. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/25 "2006-02-08T01:08:41Z")
Forgive me, but it sounds to me like she thought she had a better thing starting with someone else, and that it didn’t pan out. If nothing else, the cowardly way she went about ending things is enough to not resume them, but to add insult to the injury–she is evading responsibility for the pain she caused. This is not someone you want in your life. My best to you. Stay strong–one day at a time (and all that). ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/26 "2006-02-08T01:10:35Z")
> [@KCSuze](#): > > \ > I got more offline messages from her saying she’s crying and lonely and misses me. \ Wow. Are you ever lucky to be off of her drama roller coaster. Seriously, find a way of blocking her from dumping all her emotional baggage on you. It’s not doing you any good to hear about how crappy the life is she made for herself. (And if you do have moments of weakness, I suggest you print out this thread and the previous one to remind yourself why she isn’t in your life.) ---
**Author:** ![anu-la1979](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/47e85d/32.png) [@anu-la1979](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anu-la1979)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/27 "2006-02-08T01:21:40Z")
**Stranger** , what do you consider #1 and 2? As for me, I say Lane Meyer and Martin Blank. ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/28 "2006-02-08T02:26:55Z")
> [@anu-la1979](#): > > **Stranger** , what do you consider #1 and 2? As for me, I say Lane Meyer and Martin Blank. I’m afraid I’m a little more esoteric: I call [Craig Schwartz](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120601/)[sup]\*[/sup] and [Roy Dillon](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099703/) as being his best roles, though [Better Off Dead](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088794/) is truely the premier 80’s teen black comedy. (_Heathers_ just doesn’t seem to have held up as well, IMHO.) I thought [Grosse Point Blank](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119229/) was uneven–some very funny bits, and some draggy parts. _Better Off Dead_ might be an excellent choice to cheer up **KCSuze** , though; perhaps better than _Say Anything_. “It’s a shame when people be throwing away a perfectly good white boy like that.” Stranger [sup]\*[/sup]“My name is warts?” I don’t know what your saying to me. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/29 "2006-02-08T02:40:09Z")
I thought > [@](#): > > It’s a shame when people be throwing away a perfectly good white boy like that. was from Men At Work with Emilio Estevez and Charlie Sheen? ---
**Author:** ![anu-la1979](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/47e85d/32.png) [@anu-la1979](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anu-la1979)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/30 "2006-02-08T05:21:23Z")
No it’s from **Better off Dead**. **KCSuze** , it’s time for you to go out with Beth. God, this mountain is pure snow! Do you know the street value of this stuff? ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/31 "2006-02-08T07:19:46Z")
> [@anu-la1979](#): > > God, this mountain is pure snow! Do you know the street value of this stuff? “You ski the K-12, dude, and girls will go sterile just looking at you!” Okay, sorry for the hijack…but I highly recommend the film to **KCSuze** as a way of taking his (her?) mind off of the current troubles. Besides, Cusack ends up trading up for the French girl after blowing off his repentant ex-girlfriend. Why couldn’t my high school dating experiences have ended up like that? Stranger My little brother got his arm stuck in the microwave. So my mom had to take him to the hospital. My grandma dropped acid this morning, and she freaked out. She hijacked a busload of penguins. So it’s sort of a family crisis. Bye! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/32 "2006-02-08T15:29:27Z")
I have always (well, since I saw both movies) thought “Better Off Dead” was a far better film than “Say Anything.” We should probably go start a Cafe Society thread, though. Sorry, **Suze**. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2006, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/33 "2006-02-08T15:31:46Z")
And not in a “Sorry for what happened way” but a “Sorry that we are hijacking your thread and we take full responsibility for our own actions” way. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![PinkMarabou](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ec9cab/32.png) [@PinkMarabou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PinkMarabou)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2006, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/34 "2006-02-09T13:25:12Z")
> [@KCSuze](#): > > I got more offline messages from her saying she’s crying and lonely and misses me. Strangely enough, that doesn’t make me feel good. As mad as she made me, as deeply as she hurt me, I don’t want her to suffer. That’s because you’re a good person who has empathy for others. She wasn’t thinking about your feelings when she did this to you. She’s a coward and immature. A good relationship is where both parties can communicate with each other, no matter how hard. That’s love. What you have here is someone who doesn’t have the emotional maturity to be in love. No matter how much this pulls at your heart strings, don’t give in. She’s playing you like a fiddle and trying to make you beg her to come back. This much insecurity can drag you down too. Just remember that you DO deserve to be in a commited relationship with someone who respects your feelings. Someone who is mature enough to be your partner through thick and thin. The right person will come along. You’ve already shown that you can love and compromise, she has shown you nothing but guilt, shame, and confusion. Take some time and learn from this. Even the most heart-wrenching things in life have a lesson to be learned. Your lesson here is that you can’t continue a dead-end relationship, no matter how much you love someone. Sometimes you have to be selfish in order to save yourself from something (or someone) toxic to your well-being. Gah, that sounded so Oprah-ish! Take time to grieve. You have every right to cry and be angry. Just don’t forget that you need to take care of your feelings and have respect for yourself. ---
**Author:** ![c\_goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f4b2a3/32.png) [@c\_goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/c_goat)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2006, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187/35 "2006-02-09T20:16:43Z")
> [@anyrose](#): > > I thought … was from Men At Work with Emilio Estevez and Charlie Sheen? Men At Work did have a similar line. It was almost the exact line, something like “Looks like somebody threw away a perfectly good white boy”. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-for-what-happened/343187.md?page=1)