# I'm sorry vs. Excuse me **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 17, 2022, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579 "2022-05-17T23:39:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/21 "2022-05-18T08:31:32Z")
I believe I subconsciously transitioned from “_excuse me_” to “_sorry_” (not _“I’m sorry”_), simply because it’s one less syllable and I’m lazy. Of course, when sarcasm is warranted I still do the [Steve Martin] _excuuuuuse meeeee!_ [/Steve Martin]. Maybe that dates me. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Strangelove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.strangelove/32/6613_2.png) [@Dr.Strangelove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Strangelove)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/22 "2022-05-18T08:57:09Z")
> [@Tibby](#): > > Of course, when sarcasm is warranted I still do the [Steve Martin] _excuuuuuse meeeee!_ [/Steve Martin]. Maybe that dates me. For that extra touch, you can also always go with [excuuuuuse meeee, princess](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzfXxkHrIBM)! (maybe that dates me, too) ---
**Author:** ![kitap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b9e5f3/32.png) [@kitap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kitap)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 9:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/23 "2022-05-18T09:37:02Z")
I’m a Midwesterner. “I’m sorry” is engrained in me. I have actually said “I’m sorry, but you’re standing on my foot”. Excuse me might be used for something like excuse me ma’am, you dropped a sock when I’m at the laundromat. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/24 "2022-05-18T11:07:04Z")
I say “sorry” when I almost collide with someone, typically while rounding a corner (happens fairly regularly at work). What I’m sorry for is not paying closer attention to where I am going. I think that’s legit. mmm ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/25 "2022-05-18T13:04:35Z")
Or if you speak Yiddish: Yankel: Nu? Moishe: Nu! Yankel: NUUU?! Moishe. Nu… ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/26 "2022-05-18T13:17:54Z")
Californian: Chet: Dude? Rand: Dude. Chet: DUDE! Rand: sigh, shakes head, Dude. Also biker: Rat: FUCK! Blade: da fuck? Rat: fuckin’ fuckety fuck. Blade: shugs. Fuck. ---
**Author:** ![BrickBat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac91a4/32.png) [@BrickBat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrickBat)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/27 "2022-05-18T15:33:19Z")
> [@orcenio](#): > > I throw in a “Pardon me” where ever, when ever. Shows that I’m not being rude when I need to do important things curtly. Exactly the same for me, word for word. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/28 "2022-05-18T15:41:34Z")
What bugs me is saying “I’m sorry” when you mean “I’m sorry I didn’t hear that, would you mind repeating it.” ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/29 "2022-05-18T16:25:10Z")
> [@BrickBat](#): > > > [@orcenio](#): > > > > I throw in a “Pardon me” where ever, when ever. Shows that I’m not being rude when I need to do important things curtly. > > Exactly the same for me, word for word. I keep trying to remember to do that. It’s a social lubricant as effective as 3in1 Oil. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/30 "2022-05-18T17:19:16Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > What bugs me is saying “I’m sorry” when you mean “I’m sorry I didn’t hear that, would you mind repeating it.” This is the most common use of “I’m sorry” that I make. ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/31 "2022-05-18T18:42:00Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > For example, I’m equally comfortable with a lot of different responses to “Thank you”—“You’re welcome” or “No problem” or “You bet” or “You got it” or “Certainly” or others I can’t think of at the moment. The one I’ve noticed more frequently lately - especially with younger people - is to respond to questions with “Don’t worry abut it.” Which we have come to interpret as, “None of your business!” 😃 I tend towards the pedantic stick-in-the-mud end of the spectrum, but gotta admit I’ve never really differentiated between “I’m sorry,” “Excuse me,” or even “Pardon.” Nor have I ever particularly believed folk saying either are either sorry or desire to be excused. ;). Depending on the situation, any of them mean anything from, “Please repeat yourself” to “Get out of my way.” ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/32 "2022-05-18T18:56:49Z")
Around here they say “Please?”. And not always sounding like a question. Took me a while to get used to that. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/33 "2022-05-18T20:30:52Z")
Sometimes “pardon me” can be effective in tough situations. A while back I had a little urinal mishap in the men’s room of a biker bar. I accidentally sprayed the fellow relieving himself in the adjacent urinal. Well, this large biker dude took offense to that. He wiped the urine from his face, turned toward me, drew back his fist and was about to swing. But, I said “pardon me.” He relaxed instantly and replied, “no problem, bro.” ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/34 "2022-05-18T20:56:58Z")
Perhaps all these “victims” of police violence could learn a thing or two from your impeccable sense of etiquette. “_Pardon me_, officer, this is just a cell phone”, “_Pardon me_ officer, would you be so kind as to remove your knee from my neck” and a lot of unpleasantness might be avoided. ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/35 "2022-05-18T21:17:01Z")
I make a specific distinction in usage. “Excuse me” or “pardon me” are for when I’m doing something necessary or unavoidable that will inconvenience someone or cause discomfort. I hope they will excuse the action, but I’m not apologetic about it, because I could not reasonably avoid it. “Sorry”/“I’m sorry” is for when I’ve unnecessarily caused inconvenience or discomfort by accident or through inattention. In that case, I’m actually sorry for it. However, it doesn’t matter a whit to me if other people use the phrases differently. ---
**Author:** ![Esprise\_Me](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprise_me/32/2947_2.png) [@Esprise\_Me](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprise_Me)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/36 "2022-05-18T21:38:39Z")
> [@Unintentionally\_Blank](#): > > I don’t feel like I got old, I feel like the world continued to change faster and faster, often in subtle ways. Yup, that’s what the world does. _I used to be “with it.” Then they changed what “it” was. Now what I’m “with” isn’t “it,” and what’s “it” seems weird and scary. It’ll happen to you!_ -Abe Simpson As I approach the once-terrifying spectre of middle age, I look at and remember older folks I’ve known. None of them managed to stay as current on fashion, entertainment, and slang as they had when they were younger. But I see a distinct split emerging between those who remain curious and those who resist change, and between those who can laugh about it, and those who are upset at being left behind. That part, to me, seems like a choice. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2022, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/37 "2022-05-18T22:08:56Z")
In the Good Olde Days, people said “I _beg_ your pardon” or “I am sorry” (never “I’m sorry”) if you said or did something they found offensive or impolite. Always in a voice dripping of icicles that would turn Liquid Oxygen solid. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2022, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/38 "2022-05-19T12:05:12Z")
> [@Dr.Strangelove](#): > > It’s always been a platitude. Hello, goodbye, good morning, how are you, how’s it going, bless you, etc. do not mean anything; they are just the expected social lubrication with strangers. They were always arbitrary and they drift in arbitrary ways. Nitpick: They’re not platitudes, they’re phatic expressions. > **[Phatic expression](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phatic_expression)** > > In linguistics, a phatic expression (English: /ˈfætɪk/, FAT-ik) is a communication which primarily serves to establish or maintain social relationships. In other words, phatic expressions have mostly socio-pragmatic rather than denotational functions. They can be observed in everyday conversational exchanges, as in, for instance, exchanges of social pleasantries that do not seek or offer information of intrinsic value but rather signal willingness to observe conventional local expectations for Ot... ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2022, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/39 "2022-05-21T02:39:08Z")
Brilliant, I love it! ---
**Author:** ![Orville\_mogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/aeb1de/32.png) [@Orville\_mogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orville_mogul)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579/40 "2022-11-03T20:14:02Z")
sorry (or excuse me?), I guess I am entering zombie territory, but this reminded me of one of my all-time [favorite TV scenes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5JAlmjXN9c), which I just had to share (warning, the Youtube video is NSFW) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-sorry-vs-excuse-me/964579.md?page=3)