# I'm starting my own country **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 2, 2004, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655 "2004-12-02T04:45:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/1 "2004-12-02T04:45:12Z")
I’m sick of the way things are. I’m starting a new country called Asgard. I, of course, will be King. Since I want only the best subjects, I’m coming to the SDMB for my subjects. Tell me what role you want in the new country and I may possibly grant your request. So who wants to be Secretary of War, Secretary of Education, Secretary of Little Blue Crunch Things, etc.? ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/2 "2004-12-02T04:47:52Z")
I tried this before, years ago on the SDMB. I raised an army against those sophomoric plebes that call themselves “pop stars”. Thus, I nominate myself for Secretary of War. Tripler Don’t say “peace” in my presence. Peace puts us out of business. ---
**Author:** ![IrreverentTone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@IrreverentTone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IrreverentTone)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/3 "2004-12-02T04:56:07Z")
May I be Secretary of Evil Toasted Grapefruit And Splintered Carrots? ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/4 "2004-12-02T05:29:14Z")
I got dibs on Court Jester. That or Guy In Charge of Flogging Stupid Drivers. Either one as long as the check is signed. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/5 "2004-12-02T05:30:36Z")
Can I be Secretary of State? That would so rule. ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/6 "2004-12-02T05:37:58Z")
Oh, I thought of a better one. I want to be in charge of pot, booze and tobacco. My platform is that all three will not only be legal, but untaxed and heavily subsidized. (Thought I was a rightwinger fundie, huh?) 😉 I’d also nominate (someone second this!) **pkbites** to oversee any and all firearms issues. Assuming his platform will be a gun in every home and a tank in every driveway. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/7 "2004-12-02T05:38:11Z")
I hearby nominate myself to Secretary of Sitting Around Drinking Beer, Playing PS2, and Watching Football. ---
**Author:** ![duffer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duffer/32/1026_2.png) [@duffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/duffer)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/8 "2004-12-02T05:45:22Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > I hearby nominate myself to Secretary of Sitting Around Drinking Beer, Playing PS2, and Watching Football. How I missed that post I’ll never know. Can I be deputy? We’ll distinguish our duties by me playing XBox. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/9 "2004-12-02T05:56:06Z")
Is there a job opening for an Inspector of the Imperial Harem? I could do that. ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/10 "2004-12-02T06:01:51Z")
I’ll apply for the job of The Crazy Conspiracy Theory Guy, unless, you know, you’re actually one of _THEM!_… or maybe i’ll be the Digital Information Administrator (first act, declare nuclear war on micro$oft) Transportation Department Chief (outlaw automatic transmissions) aw heck, i’ll just apply for the position of Vice-Odin… ---
**Author:** ![Cunctator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/43a26b/32.png) [@Cunctator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cunctator)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/11 "2004-12-02T06:37:04Z")
\*\*Odinoneeye \*\* - you should have a chat with HRH Prince Leonard of [the Hutt River Province.](http://www.huttriver.net/) He claims to have seceded from the Commonwealth of Australia in 1970. ---
**Author:** ![Rich\_Mann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ce73a5/32.png) [@Rich\_Mann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rich_Mann)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/12 "2004-12-02T06:51:42Z")
oooooh…I think I would make a good Minister For Pointing Out Things That Only Seem Obvious After They’ve Been Pointed Out. Really! When my friends ask me for advice I usually, with just a few questions, lead them to a realization that the answer was right in front of them the whole time. I’ve been nicknamed “Obvious Man” by three people independently of one another. (And not in a derogatory way, either.) Before you discount the necessity of such a position, just think how differently history would have gone if even a few “great” leaders had had such personnel. As in, “Does the word _‘tarbaby’_ mean anything to ya, Dubya?” ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/13 "2004-12-02T12:00:31Z")
You can’t very well have an Asgard without the Aesir and I demand to be the Crown Prince with all the powers and priveleges thereof. I also want a nifty hammer. ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/14 "2004-12-02T12:04:39Z")
I run a mean Secret Police force. ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/15 "2004-12-02T12:53:50Z")
[sub]_Sung to the tune of O Canada_[/sub] O Asgard, Our new and improved land. **O-din-one-eye** , his wish is our command. With glowing hearts we improvise, We plow forth strong and free. From far and wide, O Asgard, we pledge our loyalty. Please keep our land, free of loose debris, O Asgard, we pledge our loyalty. O Asgard, we pledge our loy-al-tyyyyyyyyyy. 🙂 [sup]My fellow Canadians… I am sooooo sorry.[/sup] With that… I nominate myself for the official title of “Anthem Maker-Upper.” Or Court Jester, if that spot is still open. ---
**Author:** ![NutMagnet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ea5d25/32.png) [@NutMagnet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NutMagnet)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/16 "2004-12-02T12:58:25Z")
… and a motto: _Do nothing. Then rest_ ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/17 "2004-12-02T15:10:00Z")
Do you need a concubine? Are you cute? I have this cousin… ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/18 "2004-12-02T15:36:27Z")
I want to be Secretary of Parades and Other Reasons to Skip Out of Work. I do love a parade… ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/19 "2004-12-02T15:44:06Z")
I want to be Minister of Networks, Wireless Communications, And Little Gadgets With Blinking Blue Lights. Oh, And Big-Screen TVs And DVD Players. Heck, Why Not The Whole Video And Filmmaking Infrastructure While We’re At It? But I may have to shorten the name a bit. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2004, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655/20 "2004-12-02T15:46:36Z")
I don’t want a title or a job, but could I have a wee bit of land where I can make my compound and not be bothered by anybody? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-starting-my-own-country/277655.md?page=2)