# I'm stupid. What do I learn? I'm stupid. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 28, 2007, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-stupid-what-do-i-learn-im-stupid/405819 "2007-05-28T21:02:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![groman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/73ab20/32.png) [@groman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/groman)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2007, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-stupid-what-do-i-learn-im-stupid/405819/1 "2007-05-28T21:02:55Z")
You know how you can sometimes randomly bump into tidbits of social gossip or mundane information about acquaintances? A healthy mind just sort of glazes over whatever is irrelevant or boring and moves on. Why didn’t I just glaze over this one? So I find out the anniversary of a couple of people I know who are dating. No big deal, right? “Not so fast” says my subconscious, “Something is wrong!”. Oh, why, why do I have to listen to that little runt that helps me do math while I’m asleep and notices irregularities in people’s actions when they are not telling the truth? The couple in question is composed my last ex and a friend of a friend we met together. The breakup was messy. I was too upset about her independence, supposedly. Too paranoid about her friendship with this guy (who is now her boyfriend), supposedly. I didn’t trust her enough, supposedly, and then I suddenly changed over the “last few months” to the point where she “couldn’t handle it anymore”, supposedly. SO WHY WAS YOUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY WITH HIM EIGHT MONTHS AFTER OUR FUCKING BREAKUP, BITCH? :smack: I’m cool. I guess I just have to revise my numbers – I’ve been single four months longer than I thought. “Trust who your gut trusts not who you want to trust” should be the lesson but somehow I doubt I’m going to learn it. :rolleyes: Could be worse, could be raining. ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2007, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-stupid-what-do-i-learn-im-stupid/405819/2 "2007-05-28T21:08:50Z")
Aw. I’d say you’re not the stupid one in this situation. I’d award the dunce cap to the chick who is that inept at hiding her infidelity, and the dude who is dumb enough to date someone who has a proven track record of being a cheater (why do people who get involved with cheaters always end up being so shocked when person _gasp_ continues to behave like a cheater in future relationships?). ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2007, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-stupid-what-do-i-learn-im-stupid/405819/3 "2007-05-28T22:56:00Z")
If it makes you feel better, I was the jackass who played the “Other Guy” role in my last relationship, and then was surprised when she cheated on me. ---
**Author:** ![Auntbeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Auntbeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Auntbeast)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-stupid-what-do-i-learn-im-stupid/405819/4 "2007-05-29T01:04:30Z")
My mother in law did the same thing. Except she assumed that we all forgot she was still married to her ex husband when WE got married so there is no way her anniversary with her NEW husband could be longer than ours. Unless…she is actually admitted that she cheated on her ex with her present. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-stupid-what-do-i-learn-im-stupid/405819/5 "2007-05-29T14:10:25Z")
To be fair, defining one’s “anniversary” with someone else is completely subjective. It could be “the first time they met” as opposed to “the first time we locked lips, hips and took a dip”. You knew about her “friendship” with “this other guy” for a few months, so they’d already met and hit it off before your breakup. It _could_ be that she had held herself back from “going too far” with him until officially breaking it off with you… …Or, she could have been (and possibly continue to be) a lying, two-timing Mirror With Two Faces. You won’t find the answer out on this board, and frankly, it’s not worth troubling yourself over. Put the past behind you, live for the present, and think towards the future. As **Don Henley** put it: \*There are people in your life who’ve come and gone They let you down, you know they hurt your pride You better put it all behind you baby, 'cause life goes on You keep carrying that anger, it’ll eat you up inside I’ve been trying to get down to the heart of the matter But my will gets weak, and my thought seem to scatter But I think it’s about forgiveness Forgiveness – even if you don’t love me any more\* ---
**Author:** ![groman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/73ab20/32.png) [@groman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/groman)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-stupid-what-do-i-learn-im-stupid/405819/6 "2007-05-29T14:42:35Z")
[QUOTE=robardin] You won’t find the answer out on this board, and frankly, it’s not worth troubling yourself over. Put the past behind you, live for the present, and think towards the future. [/QUOTE] But is it wrong to derive a bizarre sense of closure and satisfaction from it? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2007, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-stupid-what-do-i-learn-im-stupid/405819/7 "2007-05-29T15:00:55Z")
[QUOTE=groman] SO WHY WAS YOUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY WITH HIM EIGHT MONTHS AFTER OUR FUCKING BREAKUP, BITCH? :smack: [/QUOTE] Write her a polite note on one of those storebought cards, explaining that she’s made a critical math error and needs to re-celebrate her anniversary sometime in September. If no one tells her, she could go through her whole life celebrating the wrong date. That’d be a tragedy. An ink pen, not a ballpoint, and your _best_ penmanship are called for, so as to make everything all classy and proper.