# I'm Terribly Sorry, HAL, But I'm Afraid I'm Going to Have to Shoot You **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 16, 2008, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849 "2008-02-16T02:22:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/1 "2008-02-16T02:22:31Z")
[If the Soviets had been on the _Odyssey_, then Frank Poole might still be alive.](http://www.wesh.com/news/15298911/detail.html) > [@](#): > > Astronauts aboard the International Space Station apparently have access to a gun. > > Russian Cosmonauts carry a gun on their Soyuz space capsule, which is attached to the space station. > > Every spacecraft carries survival gear for crash landings, and the Russian Soyuz has a kit that includes the gun. > > A photo of a space tourist using one version of the weapon is posted on his Web site. > > But although the gun has been there for as long as the space station has been in orbit, its existence is kept quiet. NASA and Russian officials won’t talk publicly about it. There was a GQ thread about guns in space, but I can’t find it. The thought in that thread was that the astronauts _didn’t_ have guns. That seems _not_ to be the case. ---
**Author:** ![FordPrefect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e99b99/32.png) [@FordPrefect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FordPrefect)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/2 "2008-02-16T03:17:51Z")
Of course they have guns, how else do they get fresh bacon? ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/3 "2008-02-16T04:13:09Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] There was a GQ thread about guns in space, but I can’t find it. [/QUOTE] It’s in [CoSR](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=453057). In post #12, Pushkin talks about the Cosmonaut’s gun. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/4 "2008-02-16T04:18:59Z")
[QUOTE=Xema] It’s in [CoSR](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=453057). In post #12, Pushkin talks about the Cosmonaut’s gun. [/QUOTE] Nope. That’s not the one I was thinking of. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/5 "2008-02-16T06:53:29Z")
Since one cosmonaut landed deep in the forest and was surrounded by wolves, I can’t blame them for packing heat. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/6 "2008-02-16T15:51:51Z")
What the hell did I ever do to you? ---
**Author:** ![kellner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c2a13f/32.png) [@kellner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellner)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/7 "2008-02-16T16:35:13Z")
It’s been a while but there was this one: > **[Did the Apollo 11 astronauts carry weapons?](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=238645)** > > Were the Apollo 11 astronauts prepared to defend themselves in the extremely remote chance that they encountered a hostile life form on the Moon? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/8 "2008-02-16T16:55:49Z")
[QUOTE=kellner] It’s been a while but there was this one: > **[Did the Apollo 11 astronauts carry weapons?](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=238645)** > > Were the Apollo 11 astronauts prepared to defend themselves in the extremely remote chance that they encountered a hostile life form on the Moon? [/QUOTE] [This](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=400849) is the one I was thinking of. ---
**Author:** ![Subway\_Prophet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecb155/32.png) [@Subway\_Prophet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Subway_Prophet)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/9 "2008-02-16T18:45:27Z")
[QUOTE=Hal Briston] What the hell did I ever do to you? [/QUOTE] I was waiting for someone to state that **Tuckerfan** is really protective of his flock of sheep. (Or is that joke passe now?) ---
**Author:** ![ASAKMOTSD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/919ad9/32.png) [@ASAKMOTSD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ASAKMOTSD)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2008, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/10 "2008-02-16T21:09:45Z")
[QUOTE=FordPrefect] Of course they have guns, how else do they get fresh bacon? [/QUOTE] PIGS IN SPAAACE! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![FordPrefect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e99b99/32.png) [@FordPrefect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FordPrefect)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/11 "2008-02-17T15:12:49Z")
[QUOTE=ASAKMOTSD] PIGS IN SPAAACE! 😃 [/QUOTE] I was hoping somebody would get my reference. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![WF\_Tomba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d9b06d/32.png) [@WF\_Tomba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WF_Tomba)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/12 "2008-02-17T15:27:27Z")
[QUOTE=Voyager] Since one cosmonaut landed deep in the forest and was surrounded by wolves, I can’t blame them for packing heat. [/QUOTE] !!! When? Which one? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/13 "2008-02-17T15:31:33Z")
[QUOTE=Hal Briston] What the hell did I ever do to you? [/QUOTE] [Borg sheep.](http://icanhascheezburger.com/2008/02/16/funny-pictures-i-upgraded-your-ram/) ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2008, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-terribly-sorry-hal-but-im-afraid-im-going-to-have-to-shoot-you/437849/14 "2008-02-17T15:40:33Z")
[QUOTE=Tuckerfan] [Borg sheep.](http://icanhascheezburger.com/2008/02/16/funny-pictures-i-upgraded-your-ram/) [/QUOTE] This whole thread was just a lure to get \*\*Hal \*\* to post so you could use that picture, wasn’t it? 😉