# I'm thinking about starting my own UL **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 10, 2000, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893 "2000-08-10T21:47:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2000, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/1 "2000-08-10T21:47:26Z")
That’s right. It will be a good one, with something written into it that basically states that whomever forwarded it on is a moron for ever believeing it. All I need is an idea. I thought about saying that someone is smearing the saliva of a Komodo Dragon on public toilets, and talking about the invincible bacteria that lives in it. That sounds too off the wall though. Help! ---
**Author:** ![Athena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/35a633/32.png) [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2000, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/2 "2000-08-10T22:07:01Z")
Wow, Mr. Cyn, I just got an email from my aunt’s cousin’s sister warning me about that bacteria in the saliva. It’s apparantly even worse for women - it causes infertility. It’s true! I read about it on the internet! ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2000, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/3 "2000-08-10T22:08:19Z")
I won’t say the idea has never crossed my mind but I’ve decided against it. One of the elements of spreading a UL is not telling anyone about it. I hope you realize that the next time a UL spam crosses the inbox of a Doper, we’ll all have to come to your house and kick your ass. We can’t have our own defeat Cecil’s mission of wiping out ignorance. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2000, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/4 "2000-08-10T22:52:51Z")
Actually, someone else floated this idea on this board earlier. Said poster was hooted down by the Teeming Millions with great scorn and derision. Maybe it ain’t such a good idea to promote this on a message board that claims to dedicate itself to _eradicating_ ignorance. I suggest you reconsider your malformed intention with dispatch. ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2000, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/5 "2000-08-10T22:58:00Z")
It should be something of national significance, so that my cousin from MO can email it to me 6 times. So in your example it would have to be _ring_ of Komodo-saliva smearers. Also it should reference something people feel guilty about anyway, so that they subconciously feel as though it’s deserved. However, sex and food have pretty well been dealt with, UL-wise. I suggest that you discover a previously unknown side-effect of using soft toilet paper. After all, it’s a luxurious thing, so it must be bad for you.And it ties in to your bathroom theme. Good Luck! ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2000, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/6 "2000-08-11T00:59:16Z")
Much like I said earlier, it would be the kind that shows itself to be a legend. The kind of thing where all the letters down the left-hand side of the page spell out something like “ **I forwarded this because I am a dumbass**.” Or would that not be ovbious enough? ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2000, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/7 "2000-08-11T13:33:14Z")
A friend of my mom’s tennis partner said she heard of a girl who started a UL ended up dying when her liver spontaneously erupted out of her nasal cavity. I’m pretty sure the local emergency room would know something about it. ---
**Author:** ![AWB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@AWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AWB)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2000, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/8 "2000-08-11T13:56:03Z")
I once told tourists in DC that the reason that the bottom third of the Washington Monument is lighter than the top is because it was underwater during some flood in the 1800’s. 😃 They looked amazed, and didn’t have a clue that I was making it up. (If they’d read the signs posted around the bottom of it, they’d have found the real reason.) I’ve always wondered if their kid went home and said this as fact in a “What I Did This Summer” essay. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2000, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/9 "2000-08-11T14:01:01Z")
AWB: You may have been making up the story about the Washington Monument, but it’s not original with you. It’s been used to freak out tourists for decades. Heck, I’ve got it in an old Dennis the Menace comic book at home. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2000, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/10 "2000-08-11T14:06:43Z")
**I** n England, people are suspected of leaving blue **F** ingerpaint on bathroom mirrors, causing **O** bservers of said mirror to spontaneously combust. **W** itnesses say that the victims of these mirrors **A** llegedly tried to clean the mirrors. We have **R** eason to believe that ingredients in the paint **D** irectly caused the death of **E** ight people. Families have been notified but the **D** eceased’s names have yet to be released to **T** he general public. Instead of mirrors, people now **H** ave to guess that they look good. The shame. **I** n Santa Barbara last week **S** even people were accused of the deadly **B** eating of “tourists”. Yes, fifteen **E** xtraterrestrials were beaten to death today with **C** rowbars. Police are urging people to be on watch and **A** ware of strange activity. People are also expected to report all **U** FO sightings. Local police **S** uspect that a rival gang of **E** xtraterrestrials is responsible for these deaths. **I** f you have any information, you are urged to stay **A** way from microwaves. Do not attempt to use your **M** icrowave! This is very important as brain waves **A** re transmitted through the microwave **D** irectly to the mother ship. You are also **U** rged to turn off all of your lights and unplug all **M** ajor appliances. We ask that you do this simply **B** ecause you can never be too safe. **A** lso, do not leave your house! **S** tay away from windows and lock your doors. **S** anta Barbara police thank you for your cooperation. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2000, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-thinking-about-starting-my-own-ul/28893/11 "2000-08-11T14:31:32Z")
Shit! I forgot the first “R” in forward! Damn it, all that time just to go and screw it up!