# I'm Very, Very, Very, Very, Very Sorry **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 25, 2009, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431 "2009-02-25T21:44:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/21 "2009-02-25T22:19:20Z")
Thank you, my dear. You have made my crappy afternoon. ---
**Author:** ![Katriona](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/katriona/32/113_2.png) [@Katriona](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Katriona)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/22 "2009-02-25T22:25:06Z")
> [@Hal\_Briston](#): > > Victorian homes dating back to the American Revolution, Sorry, but this phrase made me go 😕 Otherwise, awesome story! ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/23 "2009-02-25T22:26:34Z")
HOMER: Damn it, how many times am I going to have to apologize?!? MARGE: Homer, you haven’t apologized at all! HOMER: I know. I was just hoping the answer was “zero.” ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/24 "2009-02-25T22:27:21Z")
What is it with some people behind the wheel that \*just can’t wait \*for a few moments for something to open up ahead? That numb cunt nearly caused a serious accident. Amazing restraint, **Hal Briston** , because I would have certainly let her have it, particularly because she was yelling at you to apologize! The irony, it burns. ---
**Author:** ![Cuckoorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Cuckoorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cuckoorex)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/25 "2009-02-25T22:28:03Z")
> [@little\_bit](#): > > I wonder if she’s related to the Mensa candidate behind me who thought if she slammed down the gas peddle when the light changed her Jeep Larado could somehow leap-frog over my Mazda3. When the police officer asked what happened she told him she must have just accelerated faster than I did. > > Really? REALLY??? From a dead stop the entire trunk of my car moved forward 6 inches and the bumper disintegrated into a fine powder. My license plate wrapped around the frame of the car behind where the bumper used to be & we never did find the screws that held it on. > > I bet her tiny yippie dog was even more brain damaged from it’s launch from the passenger’s seat into the windshield. This reminded me of a time when I was driving on a three-lane road (two forward lanes, one left-turn lane) and was approaching a stoplight. The turn lane had a car in it and the turn arrow was red, and the forward lane I was in was beginning to turn red; there was a speed demon on my tail but I dutifully stopped my car for the red light. Apparently the genius behind me figured I was going to speed up to get through the “amber” light so he started to accelerate as we approached the intersection. Thanks to his quick reaction, he managed to swerve to avoid rear-ending me…and slammed right into the car in the left-turn lane next to me. He gave me a dirty look when I turned around to see if anyone was hurt. Tee Hee! ---
**Author:** ![Jane\_Elliot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jane_elliot/32/6166_2.png) [@Jane\_Elliot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jane_Elliot)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/26 "2009-02-25T22:33:30Z")
Must be a New Jersey thing. When I lived there I had something almost identical happen to me. Including the screaming at the stop light. I was so giddy at being alive and dentless that I just burst out laughing at her when she was done screaming and started demanding an apology. Then I drove away, still laughing in a slightly hysterical way. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/27 "2009-02-25T22:45:01Z")
What a great OP. I dearly hope you have to use the .jpgs in a court proceeding of some sort. _But you must include the captions._ Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![HookerChemical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/278dde/32.png) [@HookerChemical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HookerChemical)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/28 "2009-02-25T22:45:24Z")
> [@BubbaDog](#): > > You can’t see or hear me, but I am clapping. You should include a [diagram](http://liberty92.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/clapping-hands-lg1.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/29 "2009-02-25T22:51:12Z")
And people ask me why I don’t drive… ---
**Author:** ![Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bc8723/32.png) [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/30 "2009-02-25T22:58:04Z")
You should’ve stopped to exchange insurance information. And when I say exchange, I mean get her name and address, then phoned her dumb ass in to the police. ---
**Author:** ![Typo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5fc32e/32.png) [@Typo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/31 "2009-02-25T22:58:20Z")
Am I the only one who’s brain immediately started playing… > [@](#): > > and they took twenty-seven 8 x 10 colored glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explainin’ what each one was, to be used as evidence against us. Took pictures of the approach, the getaway, the northwest corner, the southwest corner . . .and that’s not to mention the aerial photography! ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/32 "2009-02-25T23:05:43Z")
Did she have a really obnoxious Brooklyn accent, the type that makes you draw up in pain like fingernails on a chalkboard? ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/33 "2009-02-25T23:06:14Z")
I read through the OP the first time without clinking on the link and was majorly impressed. Well written and organized and, like one poster, said set up very nicely to lead us to the “Aren’t you even going to say you’re sorry?” line. Then I went back (after reading the rest of the thread), clicking on the links this time. Freaking hilarious. I finally just gave in to laughter and let it out; my co-workers want in on the fun. I love how you say she’s about to hit that “huge fucking pink dot.” Well done, **Hal**. A+++. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/34 "2009-02-25T23:14:06Z")
The huge fucking pink dot was what made me giggle, too. I’ve been in similar situations - I love when the person who has broken the law/done something stupid has the audacity to get mad at ME. Good times, good times. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/35 "2009-02-25T23:21:47Z")
Last week was the recent time some urine stain cut me off. She then slammed on the brakes, apparently not realizing that all 20 cars in my lane had their brakelights on because the traffic light was, you know, FUCKING RED. I hit my brakes to avoid shoving three feet of Saturn Vue up her ass, the case of water in the back came hurtling forward (I had the rear seats down), slamming into the bag of groceries I had just purchased, causing the ejection of a package of fresh raspberries (at $4.99 a package) from the bag, which opened in midflight and impacted against the back of my seat. I’ll be finding those fuckers over the next several months, I would imagine. ---
**Author:** ![Claptree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@Claptree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Claptree)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/36 "2009-02-25T23:48:03Z")
Nicely done, **Hal**. You are due some applause, and I will make sure to send them to you. Once you apologize. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/37 "2009-02-25T23:57:17Z")
I think this meets the “Threadspotting” criteria, don’t y’all? 🙂 Q ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/38 "2009-02-25T23:59:46Z")
Then I must add [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TylvUGJIi_w). ---
**Author:** ![SisterCoyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/958977/32.png) [@SisterCoyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SisterCoyote)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2009, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/39 "2009-02-25T23:59:56Z")
> [@Endiqua](#): > > Am I the only one who’s brain immediately started playing… No. No you were not. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2009, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431/40 "2009-02-26T00:19:25Z")
Well… It is the hardest word to say and all… You made my day. It was a fairly crappy day, all around, but you did bring a little bit of sunshine into it. For this, I thank you. I can’t wait for Ms Chick to get the auto repair bill–side mirrors are not cheap to replace. Heh. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/im-very-very-very-very-very-sorry/487431.md?page=3)