# In memoriam: Michael Jackson joke roundup **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 26, 2009, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027 "2009-06-26T02:07:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/61 "2009-06-27T07:17:38Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > When Farrah Fawcett arrived in heaven, God granted her one wish. She wished for all the children to be safe. So God killed Micheal Jackson. A day later and I’m still laughing about this one. I’ve ensured that it has entered the global financial system at multiple touchpoints and by Monday every broker will have passed it on. ---
**Author:** ![Mikkel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikkel/32/13151_2.png) [@Mikkel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mikkel)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/62 "2009-06-27T09:03:06Z")
Michael Jacksons death does not come as a big surprise, he has been looking awfully pale lately. ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 10:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/63 "2009-06-27T10:04:25Z")
What does Michael Jackon and the fastest man in the world who intentionally gets second place in marathons have in common? They both like to come in a little behind. ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/64 "2009-06-27T10:10:10Z")
Seen on eBay. FOR SALE. One glove, index finger has slight stain ---
**Author:** ![Weston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8797f3/32.png) [@Weston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weston)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/65 "2009-06-27T10:24:43Z")
Apparently the coroner reckons the death may have been drug related - they found class As in his bedroom, class Bs in his bathroom and the whole of class 4C in his basement. Reports of Michael Jackson having died of a heart attack are incorrect. He was actually found in the children’s ward having a stroke… And this one’s funny because it’s true. Apparently, and I swear I’m not making this up, at the time of Michael Jackson’s death Elton John was having one of his seemingly weekly celebrity parties and when word spread through the crowd people started getting up to pay their respects. The last man up was Elton who closed the night with a stirring rendition of ‘Don’t let the sun go down on me’. Seriously. Here’s a [link](http://www.thelondonpaper.com/thelondonpaper/celebrity/the-buzz-in-london/justin-timberlake-leads-michael-jackson-tributes) ---
**Author:** ![J-P\_L](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/j-p_l/32/3156_2.png) [@J-P\_L](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/J-P_L)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/66 "2009-06-27T14:28:15Z")
One of the first thing that came to my mind when I heard of his death. “Hell will never be the same” ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/67 "2009-06-27T16:36:35Z")
> [@lobotomyboy63](#): > > Sure…enjoy! Mucus garcias. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/68 "2009-06-27T18:14:34Z")
You’ve been hit by, you’ve been struck by, your left ventricle. ---
**Author:** ![Weston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/8797f3/32.png) [@Weston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weston)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2009, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/69 "2009-06-27T18:19:03Z")
So just _beat it!_…or, y’know, don’t. ---
**Author:** ![I-VI-ii-V](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c89c15/32.png) [@I-VI-ii-V](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I-VI-ii-V)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/70 "2009-06-28T06:21:55Z")
Not a joke, but these are the three Google ads at the bottom of the page: Michael Jackson Dead Free Sex Offender Report Michael Jackson: Yes/No? ---
**Author:** ![rjk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@rjk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjk)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/71 "2009-06-28T06:42:01Z")
**Zyada** and I decided last night that these jokes are all black humour … but trying to be white. ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/72 "2009-06-28T06:58:36Z")
What’s the difference between MJ and Man Utd ? Man Utd can still play Giggs ---
**Author:** ![JimNightshade](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jimnightshade/32/3354_2.png) [@JimNightshade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimNightshade)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/73 "2009-06-28T09:05:39Z")
May he rest in pieces. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/74 "2009-06-28T10:53:35Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > What do caviar and Michael Jackson have in common? > They both come on little crackers. Similar: What do Michael Jackson and sardines have in common? They both come in little cans. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Duality](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.duality/32/4098_2.png) [@Mr.Duality](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Duality)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/75 "2009-06-28T16:16:33Z")
> [@Oredigger77](#): > > Why did Michael Jackson hold his baby out the window? > > To taunt Eric Clapton. I don’t get this one and I don’t want to miss a good laugh. Can someone explain it, please? ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/76 "2009-06-28T16:19:50Z")
> [@Mr.Duality](#): > > I don’t get this one and I don’t want to miss a good laugh. Can someone explain it, please? Michael Jackson dangled his child out of a window back in '03 or '04. Apparently it was because he wanted to show his adoring public his child but he caught a LOT of flack for holding a baby out of a window (which is kind of scary). And Eric Clapton’s young son fell out of a window to his death many years ago. ETA: The baby dangling incident was 2002. ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/77 "2009-06-28T16:24:56Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > Michael Jackson dangled his child out of a window back in '03 or '04. Apparently it was because he wanted to show his adoring public his child but he caught a LOT of flack for holding a baby out of a window (which is kind of scary). And Eric Clapton’s young son fell out of a window to his death many years ago. > > ETA: The baby dangling incident was 2002. …and this story went around because Clapton composed the song “Tears in Heaven” for his son. ---
**Author:** ![Washoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecae2f/32.png) [@Washoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Washoe)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2009, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/78 "2009-06-28T20:49:24Z")
Going around right after OJ was arrested: Michael Jackson called OJ in jail and said “don’t worry, I’ll be right over to take care of the kids.” Johnny Carson quip after the Pepsi incident: Ronald Reagan isn’t very hip. The other day he called Jesse Jackson and said “well, sorry you burned your hair.” ---
**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2009, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/79 "2009-06-29T03:17:36Z")
> [@I-VI-ii-V](#): > > Not a joke, but these are the three Google ads at the bottom of the page: > > Michael Jackson Dead > > Free Sex Offender Report > > Michael Jackson: Yes/No? It’s still funny. Even if it’s true. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2009, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027/80 "2009-06-29T04:16:31Z")
> [@lobotomyboy63](#): > > …and this story went around because Clapton composed the song “Tears in Heaven” for his son. Story? Are you implying it wasn’t true? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-memoriam-michael-jackson-joke-roundup/501027.md?page=5)