# In the Valley of the Green Glass Doors **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 9, 2003, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734 "2003-06-09T22:49:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Meros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Meros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meros)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/141 "2003-06-11T04:19:55Z")
I’d say you’re right **Durinsbane** seeing as neither time nor space exist in the Valley. There is, however, plenty of matter floating about. ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/142 "2003-06-11T12:33:18Z")
Time may not exist, but one can stay for a millenium. I stayed for a week, but spent no nights or days there. ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/143 "2003-06-11T12:59:36Z")
There are cobblers, but no shoes. There are cooks but no chefs. There is moonlight, but no sunshine. And all are happy in the valley. ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/144 "2003-06-11T13:33:37Z")
There are no wins, only losses. One can watch CNN, but not MTV The women have no breasts, but all have boobs. ---
**Author:** ![Loneraven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c0e974/32.png) [@Loneraven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loneraven)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/145 "2003-06-11T14:59:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by GrizzRich \* > **Time may not exist, but one can stay for a millenium.** True, one could stay for a millenium, if there were such a thing. A millennium on the other hand is a doubly appropriate length of time. ---
**Author:** ![Gr8Kat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gr8kat/32/18668_2.png) [@Gr8Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gr8Kat)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/146 "2003-06-11T17:14:34Z")
In the valley, they have pollution, but no smog. They have loopholes, but no contracts. They have freezers, but no refrigerators (fortunately, they do have coolers). And they have schools, but no teachers or students. (Sounds like they have a serious problem with skipping, yet no one is ever truant.) ---
**Author:** ![CaptainHenreh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b782af/32.png) [@CaptainHenreh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaptainHenreh)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/147 "2003-06-11T17:51:04Z")
There aren’t any motorsports in the valley. No NASCAR (thank god!) but sadly, no F1, either. But we do have Rally, so it’s all good. Too bad we don’t have any cars. :-/ ---
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/148 "2003-06-11T23:09:02Z")
There are busses, but not a single bus! Scooters, yes. Motorcycles, no. Although there is no “yes” or “no”–there’s just “affirmative.” And though you can be pissed off, you can’t be angry or mad. Nor can you be crazy, but you could be loony. No forest, but lots of woods. No lakes or rivers, but lots of brooks and creeks. No rain, but lots of rainfall and puddles. No winter, but masses of snowfall and sleet. Valley dwellers sleep but never dream, and they don’t have nightmares. ---
**Author:** ![Meros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Meros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meros)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/149 "2003-06-11T23:54:56Z")
After the day I’ve had today these seem very important. You see, in the Valley there are plenty of schools and colleges but no students or faculty and most importantly of all, while there are classes there are no tests or exams, just plenty of quizzes. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/150 "2003-06-12T00:30:06Z")
Bosses but no underlings. Eh. ---
**Author:** ![raz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@raz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raz)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/151 "2003-06-12T00:33:57Z")
Sorry, everyone. There is no alcohol allowed in the valley. But you can have all the beer you want! ---
**Author:** ![Meros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Meros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meros)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/152 "2003-06-12T01:13:10Z")
As far as types of people go in the valley there are no jocks anywhere to be seen though that isn’t surprising since there are also no sports. There is a plentiful supply of geeks though which means maybe I’ll find a way in after all 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/153 "2003-06-12T03:14:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by roadkiller \* > \*\*Sorry, everyone. There is no alcohol allowed in the valley. But you can have all the beer you want! \*\* You’re not limited to beer. Though there’s no liquor, there’s a lot of booze! ---
**Author:** ![Aholibah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Aholibah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aholibah)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/154 "2003-06-12T03:33:41Z")
Schnapps for everyone!! ---
**Author:** ![bogong\_jack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/94ad74/32.png) [@bogong\_jack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bogong_jack)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/155 "2003-06-12T05:57:15Z")
If the valley was in the Australian Great Dividing Range , you could see it from Mt Buller and Mt Gibbo , but not from Mt Hotham. ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/156 "2003-06-12T06:59:43Z")
I can’t get in, but racinchikki can go and send me a letter (but not a postcard). ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/157 "2003-06-12T07:06:42Z")
And I couldn’t drive Gun’s Chevy Nova there, but I could off-road in my Jeep Cherokee. ---
**Author:** ![racinchikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@racinchikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racinchikki)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/158 "2003-06-12T07:10:01Z")
Also, you can’t race, but you’re welcome to speed. ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/159 "2003-06-12T07:27:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Meros \* > **As far as types of people go in the valley there are no jocks anywhere to be seen though that isn’t surprising since there are also no sports.** Plenty of ballgames to see. I’m watching the Yankees play Seattle tomorrow. They’re well-known because of sluggers Dimaggio and Griffey. And Agassi and the Williams sisters are the valley’s tennis stars. Soccer is played as well, even if you’re one of the loons that calls it football. ---
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734/160 "2003-06-12T11:53:42Z")
There’s no art, and no painting, but there are collages. Nothing is colored, but things can be green, yellow, or vermillion. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-the-valley-of-the-green-glass-doors/180734.md?page=9)