# In which I delurk

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [June 10, 2006, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210 "2006-06-10T16:17:48Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/1 "2006-06-10T16:17:48Z")

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Hail, Dopers. I’ve been lurking here on and off for a year or longer. Please allow me to introduce myself. I am a man of wealth and taste. Ahem. Sorry. That will probably happen again. I’m quirky and irreverant like that. Other mundane and pointless info offered to advance my delurking includes, but is not limited to, the following, to wit:

1. My handle here is a combination of my best known alter-ego, a Norrathian Druid of raid level from Surefall Glade, Antonica, Norrath and a nod to the great and powerful Elminster.

2. On politics, my views tend to be staunchly libertarian, except that I favor a strong national defense.

3. Hi, Opal. I’ll be continuing this list beyond this item. Thought you’d like to know.

4. I like animals–medium rare, with baked potato.

5. I am generally kind to animals I’m not eating, and am indentured to my own Feline Overlord. No pics available, sorry.

6. On Religion, I’m something of an evangelical secularist.

7. The Corps is neither Mother nor Father, but Kosh has always been here.

8. Kirk woulda kicked Picard’s ass.

9. My Grok-fu is six slotted.

10. If Heaven ain’t a lot like Dixie, I don’t wanna go. They prolly don’t let druids in, anyway.  
Respectfully submitted, before noon on a Saturday, June 10, 2006.  
Oakminister

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**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/2 "2006-06-10T16:21:55Z")

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You’re weird. I like you.

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**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/3 "2006-06-10T16:22:05Z")

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Welcome! Nice intro!

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**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/4 "2006-06-10T16:26:05Z")

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Have you got that c-note you owe me? Yeah, thought I forgot about that, didn’t you?

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**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/5 "2006-06-10T16:27:44Z")

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> [@Oakminster](#):
>
> Hail, Dopers. I’ve been lurking here on and off for a year or longer. Please allow me to introduce myself. I am a man of wealth and taste. Ahem. Sorry. That will probably happen again. I’m quirky and irreverant like that. Other mundane and pointless info offered to advance my delurking includes, but is not limited to, the following, to wit:
> 
> 1. My handle here is a combination of my best known alter-ego, a Norrathian Druid of raid level from Surefall Glade, Antonica, Norrath and a nod to the great and powerful Elminster.
> 
> 2. On politics, my views tend to be staunchly libertarian, except that I favor a strong national defense.
> 
> 3. Hi, Opal. I’ll be continuing this list beyond this item. Thought you’d like to know.
> 
> 4. I like animals–medium rare, with baked potato.
> 
> 5. I am generally kind to animals I’m not eating, and am indentured to my own Feline Overlord. No pics available, sorry.
> 
> 6. On Religion, I’m something of an evangelical secularist.
> 
> 7. The Corps is neither Mother nor Father, but Kosh has always been here.
> 
> 8. Kirk woulda kicked Picard’s ass.
> 
> 9. My Grok-fu is six slotted.
> 
> 10. If Heaven ain’t a lot like Dixie, I don’t wanna go. They prolly don’t let druids in, anyway.  
> Respectfully submitted, before noon on a Saturday, June 10, 2006.  
> Oakminister

Sigh. Nothing like spelling my own name wrong in my very first post. :wally

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**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/6 "2006-06-10T16:29:47Z")

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> [@Winston Smith](#):
>
> Have you got that c-note you owe me? Yeah, thought I forgot about that, didn’t you?

Sorry, no. I only had a dollar to last until Monday, and I spent it on peace of mind.

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**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/7 "2006-06-10T16:34:20Z")

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You bought life insurance?

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**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/8 "2006-06-10T16:37:05Z")

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Hey, **Winston** , you’re still using that sig line. Cool. 🆒

(No further, um, nocturnal aberrations?)

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**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/9 "2006-06-10T16:43:10Z")

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> [@kaylasdad99](#):
>
> You bought life insurance?

Sanity insurance, actually. Looks a bit like oregano.

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**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/10 "2006-06-10T17:43:21Z")

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Welcome, **Oakminster**! Would you care for a margarita? With or without salt?

Since you have your own Feline Overlord, I guess I don’t have to remind you to avoid stepping on the cats.

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**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/11 "2006-06-10T17:56:06Z")

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> [@SnakesCatLady](#):
>
> Welcome, **Oakminster**! Would you care for a margarita? With or without salt?
> 
> Since you have your own Feline Overlord, I guess I don’t have to remind you to avoid stepping on the cats.

A margarita? Thank you. I like mine with lettuce and tomato, Heinz 57 and French-fried potato. Oh wait…that’s for cheeseburgers…and I don’t really like most vegetables or tequilla. Darn. Mind if I sip a Pepsi instead? Thanks.

As for cat stepping, I would refer the reader to the landmark 1975 case of Claw vs Bare Shin, in which the Court held Claw not liable for Shin’s damages.

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**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/12 "2006-06-10T20:19:16Z")

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I forget…since he has a cat, do we need the goat? Or do we get the squid? What about the chocolat chip cookies…it is my turn to bring them again?

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**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/13 "2006-06-10T20:26:00Z")

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> [@ivylass](#):
>
> I forget…since he has a cat, do we need the goat? Or do we get the squid? What about the chocolat chip cookies…it is my turn to bring them again?

I can’t afford to drive a Goat, and in my realm, squid are considered bait. Chocolate chip cookies, on the other hand, are highly prized morsels of brown sugary goodness, and Karana smiles upon those that bake em.

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**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/14 "2006-06-10T20:58:24Z")

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Hullo **Oakminster**. Be welcome. Enjoy your stay. 🙂

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**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/15 "2006-06-10T21:09:19Z")

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Thank you kindly for the welcomes. Here’s a shameless attempt to manipulate our Advertising Overlords by randomly mentioning Paragon City, Tankers, I7, Golf, The Doors, Janis Joplin, Luxury Automobile, Insurance, Bacon, Law, Philosophy, Sex, Science, Love, Trumpet, Baseball, Cowboy Bill Watts, Rupaul, Constipation and the Republican Party.

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**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/16 "2006-06-10T21:26:28Z")

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**Oakminster** , you are very strange. So far, so good…but:

1. Boxers, briefs, commando or codpiece?

2. Sammy Hagar or Diamond Dave?

3. Ginger or MaryAnn?

4. What is True BBQ?

5. Alton or Rachel?

6. wad or fold?

7. Angel or Spike?

8. Beatles or Stones?  
Oh, and welcome.

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**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/17 "2006-06-10T21:37:23Z")

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> [@silenus](#):
>
> **Oakminster** , you are very strange. So far, so good…but:
> 
> 1. Boxers, briefs, commando or codpiece?
> 
> 2. Sammy Hagar or Diamond Dave?
> 
> 3. Ginger or MaryAnn?
> 
> 4. What is True BBQ?
> 
> 5. Alton or Rachel?
> 
> 6. wad or fold?
> 
> 7. Angel or Spike?
> 
> 8. Beatles or Stones?  
> Oh, and welcome.

1. Commando for loving, Codpiece for fighting, otherwise no preference.

2. Ronnie Van Zant

3. Both, and a dozen raw oysters, please.

4. Manna from the Heavens, but unsuitable for Yankees.

5. Signs are unclear. Ask again later.

6. I do not recall ever shooting a fold.

7. Spike

8. [Vorlonmode] Yes. [/Vorlonmode]

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**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/18 "2006-06-10T21:44:10Z")

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I see you have always been here.

Welcome, **Oakminster**! Enjoy your stay. And the sheep, goat, calamari, and pie. (You’ll probably want to wear gloves by the time we get to the pie.)

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**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/19 "2006-06-10T21:49:18Z")

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> [@Oakminster](#):
>
> … Rupaul, Constipation and the Republican Party.

That’s right up there with “Rum, Romanism, and Rebellion” in the cannons of great American political slogans.

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**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\
**Post date:** [June 10, 2006, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210/20 "2006-06-10T21:49:30Z")

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> [@featherlou](#):
>
> Hey, **Winston** , you’re still using that sig line. Cool. 🆒
> 
> (No further, um, nocturnal aberrations?)

Aside from the walls bleeding and my daughter’s head turning around 360 degrees, no. Everything is otherwise normal. 🙂

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-delurk/360210.md?page=2)
