# In which I reveal Victoria's Secret **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 14, 2007, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374 "2007-11-14T15:40:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Nancarrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c37758/32.png) [@Nancarrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nancarrow)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2007, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/61 "2007-11-14T21:58:50Z")
[QUOTE=NaturalBlondChap] Partly air and partly a vacuum, which is wrapped around the upper surfaces thus providing uplift. So the total density of the volume occupied by the bra is less than that of air. [/QUOTE] Shurely the bra would just float up into the sky then? ---
**Author:** ![garygnu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garygnu/32/2924_2.png) [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2007, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/62 "2007-11-14T22:01:54Z")
The offending commercial on YouTube: [![]( " - YouTube") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udX61pnseVQ) naughty bits covered, not parsed just in case ---
**Author:** ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2007, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/63 "2007-11-14T22:18:30Z")
[QUOTE=BrainGlutton] When you’re pimping your lacy brassieres Rhyming verse often tempting appears But just don’t get sidetracked From the vital impact, Viz., the model’s enclosed hemispheres! [/QUOTE] You win! ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2007, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/64 "2007-11-14T22:36:26Z")
[QUOTE=Quartz] You’ve remembered the company / brand, so the advert has been successful. [/QUOTE] Oh, baloney. It’s a lingerie ad on TV. Victoria’s Secret is the only lingerie company that advertises on TV to any great degree. They’ve been pummeling us with advertising and publicity for two decades. That we should remember the brand is no great achievement. The ad does nothing to make it more likely that I will spend my money there. The last thing I need is AIR in my bra. I have boobs enough for a small village already. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2007, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/65 "2007-11-14T23:01:30Z")
I always suspected Victoria’s secret was that she was a moron. These commercials just prove it. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2007, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/66 "2007-11-14T23:06:45Z")
It is traditional for Limericks to take painful licenses, especially saving them for the end, though I would agree that same-word rhymes are simply lame whereas zingingly awful is preferred. A pretty young lady with wings Was hawking inflatable underthings Though her boobs were sublime Her excrable rhyme Showed her head had more air than her tit slings. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/67 "2007-11-15T00:10:31Z")
[QUOTE=Johnny Angel] It is traditional for Limericks to take painful licenses, especially saving them for the end, though I would agree that same-word rhymes are simply lame whereas zingingly awful is preferred. [/QUOTE] This is true. As an example, I offer the little known “clean” version of The Man from Nantucket: There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all his cash in a bucket. His daughter, named Nan, Ran off with a man. And as for the bucket she took it. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/68 "2007-11-15T00:11:16Z")
[QUOTE=Green Bean] Oh, baloney. It’s a lingerie ad on TV. Victoria’s Secret is the only lingerie company that advertises on TV to any great degree. They’ve been pummeling us with advertising and publicity for two decades. That we should remember the brand is no great achievement. The ad does nothing to make it more likely that I will spend my money there. The last thing I need is AIR in my bra. I have boobs enough for a small village already. [/QUOTE] I won’t buy a $40 bra, and better poetry won’t convince me to change my mind. However, I do buy my panties there but only the signature cotton. ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/69 "2007-11-15T00:26:05Z")
[QUOTE=El Cid Viscoso] Only if you give it a little prick. [/QUOTE] I wouldn’t cast aspersions at the fellow a lady chooses to date. His endowment, or lack thereof, is her business. ---
**Author:** ![Antonius\_Block](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/51bf81/32.png) [@Antonius\_Block](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antonius_Block)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/70 "2007-11-15T01:10:20Z")
[QUOTE=Green Bean] This is true. As an example, I offer the little known “clean” version of The Man from Nantucket: There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all his cash in a bucket. His daughter, named Nan, Ran off with a man. And as for the bucket she took it. [/QUOTE] Little known? Not to those familiar with the [Straight Dope Classics](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a2_183.html). The version that Cecil quotes includes a groanworthy pun in the last line: _And, as for the bucket, Nantucket._ {This also sets up the later _“Pawtucket”_ and _“Manhasset”_ verses.) ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/71 "2007-11-15T02:07:15Z")
While strolling the stables one day Victoria gave it away "Mum’s had a great fit Cause I’m pimpin’ my tit In the mail order business all day ! =============== Whilst riding in finest dressage Victoria’s decolletage Up and spil’t from its tether Then got cooled by the weather But softened up with a massage. =============== The copywriter’s wet dream: A model well-slathered with creme Oiled up to the hips Naught but air on her tits Angel bra cups are devoid of seams ! 😉 =============== The foulminded crew had caught sight Of a bosom that struggled with might To release itself fast From the cup’s firm elast ??? ??? ?? ?? ?? 😃 Go ahead. Finish it. Cartooniverse ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/72 "2007-11-15T02:13:40Z")
The craft went without crewing all night ---
**Author:** ![tnetennba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tnetennba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tnetennba)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/73 "2007-11-15T02:34:44Z")
They paddled with all of their might. ---
**Author:** ![koeeoaddi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/koeeoaddi/32/408_2.png) [@koeeoaddi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/koeeoaddi)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/74 "2007-11-15T02:37:14Z")
Before you all justify killin’ the idiot marketing villain who has caused you to curse he is surely no worse than the one who suggested Bob Dylan. ---
**Author:** ![HazelNutCoffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ac91a4/32.png) [@HazelNutCoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HazelNutCoffee)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/75 "2007-11-15T02:42:17Z")
[QUOTE=Turek] [She’s Australian.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miranda_Kerr) Some of them aussies have been known to speak with an accent. [/QUOTE] Ah, that makes sense, I suppose. For some reason it always sounds to me like she’s pretending to be the Queen. ---
**Author:** ![Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sticks_and_scones/32/16951_2.png) [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sticks_and_Scones)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/76 "2007-11-15T02:58:02Z")
[QUOTE=danceswithcats] MUSHROOM MUSHROOM [/QUOTE] Bwahahaha! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/77 "2007-11-15T03:52:31Z")
The OP may mock our poor ditties But we’re franchised in all major cities So why take the time To write a proper rhyme When all you care about is our titties ---
**Author:** ![Randy\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ee7513/32.png) [@Randy\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Randy_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/78 "2007-11-15T05:01:57Z")
Sometimes when we’re watching the tubes, We will be confronted by rubes. But the time’s not a waste, Though their rhyme’s not our taste, Cause we still get to ogle their boobs! ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/79 "2007-11-15T06:05:41Z")
Some fellas using computers Are fond of the sweet little cooters But some guys who click While holding their dick Are seeking the bodacious melons. Needs a little work. ---
**Author:** ![TripleTee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac8455/32.png) [@TripleTee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TripleTee)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2007, 8:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374/80 "2007-11-15T08:46:55Z")
[QUOTE=Little Nemo] The OP may mock our poor ditties But we’re franchised in all major cities So why take the time To write a proper rhyme When all you care about is our titties [/QUOTE] I believe we have a winner. _ding ding_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-i-reveal-victorias-secret/426374.md?page=5)