# In which jarbaby simply begs for trouble

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [June 13, 2001, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684 "2001-06-13T16:16:53Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1

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### Author: ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/1 "2001-06-13T16:16:53Z")

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After The House On The Rock…what could possibly top it for summer vacations?

A TRIP TO SCENIC LAS VEGAS OF COURSE! I just got my tickets today, my friend Tina and I are jetting out there to see the Rammstein concert at the House of Blues and we’re crashing at the Luxor, where I’ll indulge in the many spa treatments made available to me.

Gambling!  
Fire!  
Dildos!  
Germans!  
Swimming!  
Alcohol!  
Pyramids!  
Hot, Dry, Air!  
The Man Of My Freaking Dreams!  
Hookers!  
Sigfried and Roy!

My god! I’ve never ever been to Vegas and I’m so…freaking…excited…I am absolutely ready to burst.

Any advice from the long time Vegas lovers? Stick on fifteen, right?

jarbaby

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### Author: ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/2 "2001-06-13T17:29:59Z")

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Well, if you’re going to be in Luxor anyway then you _must_ see Blue Man Group. Must. I will brook no dissent from this command, young lady! Hie thee to Blue Man Group!

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### Author: ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/3 "2001-06-13T18:14:46Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Fiver \*  
> Must. I will brook no dissent from this command, young lady! Hie thee to Blue Man Group!

Well golly, if your COMMANDING it, how can I resist? 😉

I’ve actually seen the Blue Man Group, twice in fact…did you know that Chicago is now the official training center for all subsequent blue men? that’s a fact!

jar

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### Author: ![MikeG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikeg/32/4329_2.png) [@MikeG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeG)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/4 "2001-06-13T18:28:58Z")

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I keep telling you, you don’t need to beg, babe!  
[sub]yes, I know that’s what you like…[/sub]

Trouble is just ten minutes away…😃

I have never been to Vegas either and am dying to go. I guess I will just live vicariously through you - don’t forget to take lots of pics!

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### Author: ![BunnyGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BunnyGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyGirl)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/5 "2001-06-13T18:29:32Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> we’re crashing at the Luxor, where I’ll indulge in the many spa  
> treatments made available to me.
> 
> ```
> Gambling!
> Fire!
> Dildos!
> Germans!
> Swimming!
> Alcohol!
> Pyramids!
> Hot, Dry, Air!
> The Man Of My Freaking Dreams!
> Hookers!
> Sigfried and Roy! 
> 
> ```

I don’t know about anyone else, but I read this with a colon at the “treatments made available to me”:

I thought, “Wow! That’s **some** spa!” :eek: 😃

Don’t try the treatments all at once. You know, the gambling with a fiery German dildo while swimming in a Pyramid and drinking, whilst having the man of your freaking dreams blow hot, dry air on you while hookers get it on with Sigfried and Roy.

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### Author: ![MrVisible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@MrVisible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrVisible)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/6 "2001-06-13T18:34:20Z")

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[Cirque Du Soleil](http://www.cirquedusoleil.com/en/index.html)

Seriously. One of the most magnificent things I have ever seen. If you haven’t seen one of their performances on video, go rent it, and then get tickets to O for when you’re out there. It’s at the Bellaggio.

Have fun!

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### Author: ![Fiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e274bd/32.png) [@Fiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiver)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/7 "2001-06-13T19:01:06Z")

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**jarbabyj** :

> [@](#):
>
> I’ve actually seen the Blue Man Group, twice in fact…

Don’t make me tell you again!

Well, if you’ve already seen them twice, then I guess you’re excused. It occurred to me after my last post that, being a Chicagolander, you’d probably already seen them.

You know, I was going to be a “Blue Man” this Halloween, until I got the better idea of dressing up as Dorothy from Wizard of Oz (I’d’ve had to shave to be a Blue Man). Then I realized I’ll be in DC for the Marine Corps Marathon this year and will miss the standard Halloween festivities. Ah well (No, I’m not running a marathon dressed as Dorothy! Ruby slippers couldn’t take 26.2 miles and I’d get too hot under the wig!).

What? Oh right, Las Vegas. I second the nomination of Cirque du Soleil shows. If you can afford it (I saw it for free last year; my company flew me to Vegas for a conference and put me up at the Bellagio for a week), go see _O_ at the Bellagio, the single most wonderful, magical circus show I’ve ever seen ever.

The Fremont Street Experience is tacky, corny and free! Not a must-do, but it’s an amusing diversion.

The roller coaster atop New York New York is very fun.

Stay away from the Imperial Palace and Camelot. The former is old and run-down, and the latter is tacky (in a bad way).

If Penn and Teller are at the MGM Grand, go see them (they were on the road last time I was there :(). I’ve seen their touring show, but the trick wherein Teller walks through a live cow is performed only in Vegas.

The hourly pirate battle at Treasure Island is big fun. The hourly volcano eruption at the Mirage is a letdown.

Caesar’s Palace is fun to walk through; the architecture is just amazing. And the Escape to Atlantis ride in Caesar’s is pretty exciting, but overpriced (like, $10 for one ride!).

The new Aladdin was still being built when I was there, so maybe it’s worth a look; I don’t know.

In addition to all that, I’m told there are a few places where you can gamble.

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### Author: ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/8 "2001-06-13T22:59:23Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \*  
> **Dildos!  
> Germans!**

I’m not sure the Rammstein lads are into that sort of thing, sweetie. But I’ll give you a hundred bucks if you succeed. 😃

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### Author: ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/9 "2001-06-13T23:41:52Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> In which jarbaby simply begs for trouble

What else is new? 😛  
If your staying at the Luxor ( i hate you for that, btw), you have to get a cheesy Egyptian looking do-dah to give me when I’m in Chicago. Some nimrod in my house broke my silvery hurricane glass I had from there.

I second what **MrVisible** said. Cirque Du Soleil is wicked sweet.

And **Coldfire** is a nasty, nasty man. 😉

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### Author: ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)
#### Post date: [June 13, 2001, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/10 "2001-06-13T23:52:34Z")

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The _Star Trek Experience_?

Never seen it, but if you’re a Trekkie, [sub]{ and how many people on-line aren’t?}[/sub] it might be worth it.

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### Author: ![Pstarr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f19dbf/32.png) [@Pstarr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pstarr)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/11 "2001-06-14T00:20:32Z")

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Re: Star Trek Experience

I was in Vegas about a month ago and did the Star Trek thing, If you are into the show I would recommend it. The ride is pretty cool actually. Of course I saw it for free…

I also want to point out the other things to do in the area. Hoover Dam is heatstroketastic. And something I have always wanted to do, but the girlfried would have none of, was to get a hooker and just pay her to sit there or play cards or something. I think that would be a surreal experience.

Either way, have a blast!!

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### Author: ![reprise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ea666f/32.png) [@reprise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/reprise)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/12 "2001-06-14T00:25:01Z")

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I hope you’re going to be there a few more days jarbabyj - pepperlandgirl is getting married this weekend and they’re booked into the Luxor. Maybe you can throw rice or something.

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### Author: ![Carina42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Carina42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carina42)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/13 "2001-06-14T00:27:16Z")

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Vegas is so fucking cool!  
Luxor is very nice, I’ve stayed there. GO TO THE LIBERACE MUSEUM!! It’s spread out in a tacky off-strip mall, and is really neat. The greatest gift store, and the Liberace old-queen groupies are worth the paltry admission price

here’s a trick: Last time I was in Vegas, I stayed at Bellagio. We checked into one of the regular suites, but there was a problem with the plumbing…the room absolutely stunk, big time, like sewer gas. we complained, and were put into a $1,500 per night suite with three bathrooms, automatic drapes, and gift baskets in every room. They even packed up & moved our belongings from Stinky Suite to really Fancy suite, without making a comment about the duct tape and crotchless undies. 🙂

Here’s the tip part: take along a couple of raw popcorn shrimp, and hide them in the room. when they start to smell, complain to management & you might get bumped to really fancy digs.

Take your silliest sexy outfits along to wear. anything goes in Vegas. I have a fake fur tiger print bustier that I simply cannot wear in Denver…but it’s perfect for Vegas. Go to Ceasars Palace Shops…it’s amazing. If you can get away, Hoover Dam is a great outing, and so is Lake Mead.

Gosh…have fun, take pictures, and…have fun!

(This from someone who no longer drinks, doesn’t gamble, and still thinks Vegas is a total hoot.)

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### Author: ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/14 "2001-06-14T02:32:32Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by BunnyGirl \*  
> \*\*…while hookers get it on with Sigfried and Roy. \*\*

MALE hookers, mebbe… 🙂

[sub]or is that an UL\*\*

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### Author: ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/15 "2001-06-14T03:04:57Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \*  
> \*\*  
> Sigfried and Roy!  
> \*\*

Also known as The HomoErotic Kitty Extravaganza featuring Half-Naked Young Men In Fake Muscle Suits.

It’s not worth it. I saw it for free, and it still wasn’t worth it.

stoid

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### Author: ![lurkernomore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@lurkernomore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurkernomore)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/16 "2001-06-14T04:12:11Z")

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I beg to differ. Jarbaby does NOT beg for trouble.  
Jarbaby \*\*\* IS \*\*\* trouble.

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### Author: ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/17 "2001-06-14T04:13:26Z")

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Yeah, jarbaby, how long are you going to be there? We’ll be coming in Tuesday morning at like 8:00. I’d love to meet you.

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### Author: ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/18 "2001-06-14T04:27:02Z")

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heh.

I stand by my origional statement, **lurker**.

She’s begging for it.

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### Author: ![Juniper200](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@Juniper200](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Juniper200)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/19 "2001-06-14T04:40:49Z")

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I’ll second Fiver’s Penn and Teller emotion. They’ve got chunks of guys like Sigfried and Roy in their stool. They rock my world. I think they’ve broken ties with the MGM Grand, though. Most of their Vegas work has been at the Rio in the Samba Theater. Their [schedule](http://www.sincity.com/penn-n-teller/pt-tour-schedule.html) might prove helpful.

Oh, and the tickets are easier to get than S&R, and they cost waaaaaaay less. And they’re all atheist and stuff and they “magically” burn a flag on stage in support of the First Amendment. What more can you want. Go. You will like it.

Okay. Done gushing. Have fun!

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### Author: ![shell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/46a35a/32.png) [@shell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shell)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/20 "2001-06-14T05:09:42Z")

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If they ar in LV and you get the chance to see them, don’t miss.

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