# In which jarbaby simply begs for trouble
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [June 13, 2001, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684 "2001-06-13T16:16:53Z")
**Posts on this page:** 14
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/21 "2001-06-14T13:52:35Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Coldfire \*
> I’m not sure the Rammstein lads are into that sort of thing, sweetie. But I’ll give you a hundred bucks if you succeed. 😃
Oh Coldie :: pinching your cheek ::
Obviously you’ve never seen Rammstein live…wherein dildos are the main attraction! 😃
I’m going to Vegas on the second and leaving on the afternoon of the fourth of July.
And I am perfectly insulted that anyone would insinuate that I am trouble. PLEASE!
I’m sure I’ll be appalled at all the sin and crime.
jarbaby
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### Author:  [@Fredge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fredge)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/22 "2001-06-14T15:09:02Z")
If you have access to a car while there I would highly recommend Red Rock Canyon or Valley of Fire. Both are beautiful state parks that have some excellent picture taking opportunities. Both are within an hours drive (do some searches for specifics); Valley of Fire takes a little longer to get to and it’s a little bigger, but I personally thought it was the better of the two (though Red Rock is a very nice trip as well).
If you’re going in the summer, I would recommend early in the morning to avoid the heat. Take lots of water.
Now if you’re like me (a nutcase) you might venture out to the borders of Area 51/Groom Lake to see if you can catch site of some top secret military aircraft (or UFO’s if you’re inclined to believe in those). I took that road trip last time I was out there.
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### Author:  [@Sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/23 "2001-06-14T15:09:13Z")
Ok, I can’t believe we got this far without someone mentioning this:
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Fiver \*
> [**You know, I was going to be a “Blue Man” this Halloween, until I got the better idea of dressing up as Dorothy from Wizard of Oz (I’d’ve had to shave to be a Blue Man).**
What cracks me up here is that Fiver would have HAD to shave to be a Blue Man but NOT to be Dorothy. Hee hee!
Um, okay, so anyway…on to Vegas. Go down to the Plaza Hotel, downtown. Used to be the big fancy hotel back in the day but is now a pathetic run-down heap. They have PENNY slots! Whee! What fun! (Well, okay, it was fun for about a half hour to drop pennies in the slots and look at the gambling addicts. Then we had to get out…you know, there but for the grace of God…)
Here’s my best tip, learned from experience:
When Mr. Jarbaby wins many hundreds of dollars and gives them to you for safekeeping, with the promise that he will take you to see _Starlight Express_ “after this hand”…do NOT give back the many hundreds of dollars when Mr. Jarbaby suddenly loses all his money and wants more. If you do this, you won’t get to see _Starlight Express_ until 5 years later when you go to London.
Just keep that in mind and you’ll have a great time!
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### Author:  [@Fredge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fredge)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/24 "2001-06-14T15:14:36Z")
If you have access to a car while there I would highly recommend Red Rock Canyon or Valley of Fire. Both are beautiful state parks that have some excellent picture taking opportunities. Both are within an hours drive (do some searches for specifics); Valley of Fire takes a little longer to get to and it’s a little bigger, but I personally thought it was the better of the two (though Red Rock is a very nice trip as well).
If you’re going in the summer, I would recommend early in the morning to avoid the heat. Take lots of water.
Now if you’re like me (a nutcase) you might venture out to the borders of Area 51/Groom Lake to see if you can catch site of some top secret military aircraft (or UFO’s if you’re inclined to believe in those). I took that road trip last time I was out there.
---
### Author:  [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/25 "2001-06-14T15:20:00Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Sunshine \*
>
> When Mr. Jarbaby wins many hundreds of dollars and gives them to you for safekeeping, with the promise that he will take you to see _Starlight Express_ “after this hand”…do NOT give back the many hundreds of dollars when Mr. Jarbaby suddenly loses all his money and wants more. If you do this, you won’t get to see _Starlight Express_ until 5 years later when you go to London.
Oh baby.
Mr. Jarbaby ain’t going. It’s girl’s vacation only. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA
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### Author:  [@Sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/26 "2001-06-14T15:36:59Z")
Aha! Even better…leave the husband at home!
Now, where’s my travel agent’s phone #…
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### Author:  [@SuaSponte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuaSponte)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/27 "2001-06-14T22:13:24Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \*
> Stick on fifteen, right?
As a card counter of absolutely no repute, but one who does take his blackjack very seriously, don’t even joke about this. If the dealer is showing a 7 through ace, hit the damn card.
This is important, **jarbabyj** , and to prove how serious I am, I must issue a threat: if I ever here that you stayed on 15 when you should have hit, I will never allow you to go down on me.
Yes, yes, I know I’m being cruel, but it’s for your own good.
Sua
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### Author:  [@SuaSponte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuaSponte)
#### Post date: [June 14, 2001, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/28 "2001-06-14T22:14:26Z")
er, “hear”
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### Author:  [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2001, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/29 "2001-06-15T13:56:58Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by SuaSponte \*
> if I ever here that you stayed on 15 when you should have hit, I will never allow you to go down on me.
>
> Yes, yes, I know I’m being cruel, but it’s for your own good.
Holy Crapstick. that is a threat. Someone refresh me on the blackjack rules pronto. I used to be ok at it, but I haven’t played in two years.
jarbaby
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### Author:  [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2001, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/30 "2001-06-15T14:35:41Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \*
> Someone refresh me on the blackjack rules pronto. I used to be ok at it, but I haven’t played in two years.
>
> jarbaby \*\*
I’m by no means an expert, but I did go home with about $300 more than I went with on my only trip to Vegas. I only played Craps and Blackjack (best odds for the player on these games).
Always split Aces and Eights. Double down on 10 and 11. 9 also if the dealer is showing a 6 (I think, I’m not sure I remember that last one correctly).
Never increase your betting when you are losing, only after a win. And don’t forget to tip your dealer.
Oh, and if you have time go to M&M world 🙂
[sub]still can’t believe you’re going to Vegas and _not_ seeing Tom Jones[/sub]
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### Author:  [@vix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vix)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2001, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/31 "2001-06-15T15:08:17Z")
I have almost nothing to add since all the good answers have been taken. 🙂
I will second (third? fifth?) recommendations for:
Cirque du Soleil. I saw Mystere, which was fabulous. Worth every penny of $90 or whatever exorbitant sum I paid. I also agree that Sigfried and Roy, Messrs. Codpieces Extraordinaire, are overrated. See Lance Burton instead.
The Hoover Dam and Red Rock Canyon. Excellent getaways.
The Star Trek Experience. Much better than I thought it would be. (See artifacts from the shows! Get your picture taken with a Klingon! Drink Romulan Ale!)
Nickle or penny slots. Spend a ton of time. Lose a tiny bit of money.
And I do actually have an original thought… As cheesy as it sounds, the fountain show at Bellagio is pretty cool. And hey, it’s Vegas. It’s all about cheese.
Have a great time and say Hi to my kid sister who lives in Vegas… you’ll be there on her birthday. 😉
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### Author:  [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2001, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/32 "2001-06-15T15:15:21Z")
My youngest sis went to Vegas last November - she grabbed Wayne Newton’s ass… Apparently she had a good time.
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### Author:  [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2001, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/33 "2001-06-15T15:48:52Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by FairyChatMom \*
> \*\*My youngest sis went to Vegas last November - she grabbed Wayne Newton’s ass… Apparently she had a good time. \*\*
Yes, but did Wayne have a good time? 🙂
[sub]BTW, congrats on post #1400, **FCM**![/sub]
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### Author:  [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)
#### Post date: [June 15, 2001, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-jarbaby-simply-begs-for-trouble/68684/34 "2001-06-15T15:57:18Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by FairyChatMom \*
> \*\*My youngest sis went to Vegas last November - she grabbed Wayne Newton’s ass… Apparently she had a good time. \*\*
If I’m going to be playing any grab ass in Vegas, it’s going to be with a big, sweaty, muscular German man, not an old bat like Wayne Newton… 😃
Although, man oh man…he sings a mean dankeschon
jarbaby
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