# In which my friends stop me from putting poop in a purse **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 4, 2014, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022 "2014-06-04T14:02:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2014, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/81 "2014-06-05T18:58:48Z")
> [@RobDog](#): > > Just re-read the OP and noticed she says she plays water polo. > > I like her even less now. > > Those poor, poor horses. Given her poop fixation, my guess is ‘water polo’ is some kind of sex play where horses piss on her. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2014, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/82 "2014-06-05T19:30:58Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > I sort of understand the idea that she might only have wanted it for a specific event… but it’s a fucking _purse_. Do any women buy purses to use for one night? If so, I’m going to punch them in the face. Well, if it was, say, a very fancy purse she might have wanted it for a formal event and not needed it again for six months. I don’t see anything wrong with checking with the buyer, once you’ve realized you’ve made a big mistake, and asking if she’d prefer priority shipping or a refund. It’s the REST of the OP that’s the problem. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2014, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/83 "2014-06-05T19:43:00Z")
> [@](#): > > I do need it for another function this Friday and did need it for one for the weekend just gone. If you can express post it would be good. > > To which, pleased with my apparent skillz in having persuaded Ebay Whore to have some confidence in me (no, as it turns out) as well as coming to a mutually satisfactory solution (no, as it turns out), as well as my restraint in not telling her to get fucking fucked (may still happen), I responded: > > Ack - disaster. All my fault. I can’t make it home before the post closes today but it will be sent tomorrow without fail. I will keep you updated. So she missed one use for it and because of your repeated fuckupery she will not have it for ANOTHER use that she purchased it for. I would say look at yourself as the bitch but you’ll have to pull your head out of your ass first. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2014, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/84 "2014-06-05T21:19:47Z")
I don’t think our beloved OP is coming back. Maybe there was a another catastrophe on the way to the post office? ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2014, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/85 "2014-06-05T21:41:46Z")
She had to take a shit. Or give a shit. (Which she obviously doesn’t) ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2014, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/86 "2014-06-05T22:00:57Z")
> [@gallows\_fodder](#): > > Wait, why is she a whore? Are you kidding? Just look at that slutty purse she bought! ---
**Author:** ![Depechemode](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ccd318/32.png) [@Depechemode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Depechemode)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2014, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/87 "2014-06-06T00:34:25Z")
I would have filed a Paypal claim on you and given you a negative rating so fast it would make your head spin. She PAID for the item and you didn’t ship it. That is no ones fault but YOURS. I also find it very hard to believe that this is your first negative feedback. ---
**Author:** ![Jungian\_Camisole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8baadc/32.png) [@Jungian\_Camisole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jungian_Camisole)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2014, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/88 "2014-06-06T00:42:51Z")
I’m voting for performance art. Yoko Ono, you ain’t. ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2014, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/89 "2014-06-06T04:38:50Z")
> [@RobDog](#): > > Just re-read the OP and noticed she says she plays water polo. Yeah, but she didn’t say what with. ---
**Author:** ![Astraea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3e96dc/32.png) [@Astraea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astraea)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2014, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/90 "2014-06-06T21:22:26Z")
I can’t believe all the people questioning whether or not the buyer might till want the purse. As one person pointed out she may have only needed it for those two very special events. Has anyone actually bought a prom dress and worn it more than once? If the buyer had not stated it, it could have been an intended gift for someone. In that case I highly doubt she would have much use for it after the ‘giftees’ birthday party or whatever was over and done. Ditto for hating sellers who mark items as shipped before they truly are. Just had to deal with this same thing this week. The blame was laid on the post office ‘losing’ my package for a while but I have my doubts. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2014, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/91 "2014-06-06T21:40:57Z")
> [@Astraea](#): > > I can’t believe all the people questioning whether or not the buyer might till want the purse. As one person pointed out she may have only needed it for those two very special events. Pretty sure most people here would acknowledge that possibility - but the OP’s handling of the situation (if described verbatim, or even real at all) is a fucking trainwreck. Don’t keep on asking the buyer if they want something they bought, then failing/forgetting to do anything, except ask the same damn question again. ---
**Author:** ![Athabasca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Athabasca](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athabasca)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2014, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/92 "2014-06-06T21:47:01Z")
> [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](#): > > Are you kidding? Just look at that slutty purse she bought! Don’t you mean shitty purse? ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/93 "2014-06-07T01:22:24Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > And I keep having the song “Dick in a Box” running through my head, only with the title phrase replaced by “Poop in a Purse.” Me, it’s “keeping your poop in a jar” by Hayseed Dixie but in a purse, instead. ---
**Author:** ![choie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/choie/32/7829_2.png) [@choie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/choie)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/94 "2014-06-07T05:51:53Z")
> [@Astraea](#): > > If the buyer had not stated it, it could have been an intended gift for someone. In that case I highly doubt she would have much use for it after the ‘giftees’ birthday party or whatever was over and done. Of course, because it’s totally natural that you’d take the time to pick out and order a specific gift for someone’s party and then, if it doesn’t arrive for the actual birthday party (or whatever), you’d just say “eh, fuck it, I might as well not give my friend a gift at all.” Who would do this? Jesus. Send the damn bag already. Frankly, if I were this seller, I’d be throwing in a nice little extra, like a small array of skin lotion, scented soap, or even an extra purse or bag–anything that seems to match your store’s style. And I’d be including an apologetic card as well. I’ve had this done for me by eBay or Amazon sellers if they’ve been late or the order had been changed for whatever reason–all without a complaint necessary from me. They got good reviews from me as a result. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/95 "2014-06-07T05:59:01Z")
I agree that anyone who would decide “fuck it, my friend doesn’t need this purse anymore because their birthday already came and went” is a douchebag of the first degree. And needing a particular purse for an event that you will never use again is stupid. This is NOT a prom dress we are talking about. It’s a purse. I would never, EVER want a seller to just assume that I might not want something anymore just because it was late. If I didn’t need something shipped any longer due to a delay, I realize that the onus is on ME to let them know that I no longer need it (and yes, this has happened once). ---
**Author:** ![Elemenopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b5e925/32.png) [@Elemenopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elemenopy)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/96 "2014-06-07T07:06:09Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > Well, if it was, say, a very fancy purse she might have wanted it for a formal event and not needed it again for six months. > > I don’t see anything wrong with checking with the buyer, once you’ve realized you’ve made a big mistake, and asking if she’d prefer priority shipping or a refund. It’s the REST of the OP that’s the problem. This, and **drewtwo** , what if it were a prom dress? Maybe it’s the purse, or jewelry, or shoes, or lingerie, to go with a prom dress, capische? Same difference. Ok. I used to be an avid eBay buyer, and once or twice I’ve been a couple days late with a payment due to home issues or general disorganization. I sent profuse apologies _along with_ the payment, and asked if I could sweeten the deal due to my negligence. If I were on the sellers’ end, I’d do the equivalent. Send the item posthaste and maybe a partial refund or some such. I do not understand the OP’s hatred toward the buyer. At all. The OP was negligent, regardless of circumstance. Explain, apologize, make restitution. Poop? You have got to be kidding. The only thing that should recall a fecal aroma is the OP’s attitude. I \*\*\*am \*\*\*sorry for her situation, but there was ample time and opportunity described to function as a professional. Or suck it up somehow. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/97 "2014-06-07T07:30:33Z")
Here’s how it should have gone (once the initial error of not sending the damn thing is known): [ul] [li]Send the item by a fast method, straight away[/li][li]Contact the seller and apologise profusely. Maybe offer an olive branch such as partial refund (especially if there has been a significant delay)[/li][li]If the seller is angry because the item is now useless (i.e. required for a one-off event), fully refund them and either a)let them keep it or b)pay for the return postage.[/li][/ul] If any of the above leaves you out of pocket, chalk that up as the expense of learning to be less of a fucking idiot. In case the above sounds unreasonable, I should say I am writing this from the perspective of a seller - I have made exactly this (initial) mistake before, and was not under any illusions about whose fault it was (mine), and who should make it right (me). ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/98 "2014-06-07T12:18:51Z")
> [@bathsheba](#): > > My fault, but it’s been one of those times when your husband breaks his leg and dislocates his ankle and then gets a pressure area which you have to dress and you have to do everything for him as well as everything he normally does and go from work to water polo to work to rowing to fix the flight of steps your husband obliterated when he tried to drive a bobcat down them to work to debating to lather rinse repeat…I had a call from a distressed relative needing assistance with a guardianship issue. Have you considered changing your eBay handle to **daysofourlives**? Your life is quite the soap opera. Small businesses (including the brick and mortar kind) do experience illnesses in the family and other problems that can affect service. If they want to stay in business, they don’t make long drawn-out excuses for taking people’s money and not delivering the product - they communicate promptly and put things right the first chance they get. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/99 "2014-06-07T12:29:01Z")
I really don’t get why anyone sees the whole “maybe she doesn’t want it any more excuse” as in any way valid. I don’t expect the grocery bagger who’s helping me load my stuff in the car to stop and ask me, “Are you still hungry? If not, I can put these pretzels back.” Customer buys something, customer receives something. There should be no extra steps between those two events. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2014, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022/100 "2014-06-07T12:54:34Z")
It was just another way for the seller to stall. Sorry bathsheba, the buyer did nothing to earn your ire and insults. Whore? Really? Ridiculous. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-which-my-friends-stop-me-from-putting-poop-in-a-purse/690022.md?page=6)