# In your experience...
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [September 12, 2008, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344 "2008-09-12T21:24:30Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Debon\_Err](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Debon_Err)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2008, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/1 "2008-09-12T21:24:30Z")
How long does the “magic” of a new releationship last?
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### Author:  [@Wakinyan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wakinyan)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2008, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/2 "2008-09-12T21:36:52Z")
Not longer than a few months.
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### Author:  [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2008, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/3 "2008-09-12T21:42:47Z")
I’m not familiar with the term “rel **ea** tionship” but as it seems to be derived from “release” I’d have to say, oh, maybe a second or two at most. 😃
I’m currently in my second-ever rel **a** tionship that’s had any magic to it. I’ll let you know when it’s over. Been really good for about a month so far though.
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### Author:  [@Flander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flander)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2008, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/4 "2008-09-12T21:52:29Z")
Mine has been going on since January and there’s plenty 'o magic. We had a snag last week, but that got resolved…back to magic.
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### Author:  [@Debon\_Err](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Debon_Err)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2008, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/5 "2008-09-12T21:56:39Z")
> [@Inigo\_Montoya](#):
>
> I’m not familiar with the term “rel **ea** tionship” but as it seems to be derived from “release” I’d have to say, oh, maybe a second or two at most. 😃
What’s the word I’m looking for… Pedant… Yes, that’s it! 😛
That’s what I get for trying to start a thread in a hurry at work…:smack:
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### Author:  [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2008, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/6 "2008-09-12T22:02:38Z")
A few years, at least. So far. But we didn’t have that magic honeymoon period where we met and went mad for one another. We were friends, eased into the relationship, and while we do fight, I find myself falling in love with him a little more every week.
Did I really just write that?
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [September 12, 2008, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/7 "2008-09-12T22:12:04Z")
5 years and counting. Sounds corny but I love my wife more every day.
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### Author:  [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/8 "2008-09-13T13:17:10Z")
I find the swoony-mcwonderful feeling usually starts to fade 3-5 months in, as this is generally when people start letting their guard down a little and acting like a normal human being. It doesn’t mean I’m not in love anymore, just that I’m not convinced I’m in a fairy tale once you leave your ugly undergotchies on the back of my toilet or offhandedly mention an ingrown nipple hair or whatever.
The other day a friend I’ve had since the 90’s said, “You know… you’re lucky you’ve never been exposed to the side of me that eats slim jims on road trips just because I know how disgustingly gassy they make me. One time we all had to pull over because one of the guys was about to hurk.”
And you know… once that level of honesty comes out, swoony-mcwonderful takes a backseat to :eek:😕:eek:
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### Author:  [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/9 "2008-09-13T13:46:39Z")
> [@malkavia](#):
>
> I find the swoony-mcwonderful feeling usually starts to fade 3-5 months in, as this is generally when people start letting their guard down a little and acting like a normal human being. It doesn’t mean I’m not in love anymore, just that I’m not convinced I’m in a fairy tale once you leave your ugly undergotchies on the back of my toilet or offhandedly mention an ingrown nipple hair or whatever.
>
> The other day a friend I’ve had since the 90’s said, “You know.. you’re lucky you’ve never been exposed to the side of me that eats slim jims on road trips just because I know how disgustingly gassy they make me. One time we all had to pull over because one of the guys was about to hurk.”
>
> And you know.. once that level of honesty comes out, swoony-mcwonderful takes a backseat to :eek:😕:eek:
Meh. Real life includes farts. It’s not like they farted on your head…
…but now that I mention it…
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### Author:  [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/10 "2008-09-13T14:17:30Z")
> [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](#):
>
> Meh. Real life includes farts. It’s not like they farted on your head…
>
> …but now that I mention it…
I had a friend who admitted to me, after 12 years of marriage, he still hadn’t farted around his wife (and vice-versa). I was aghast! Aghast, I say! It was then, I knew they were living a lie.
He was divorced a year later.
Let that be a lesson to you young lovers!
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/11 "2008-09-13T15:26:40Z")
> [@malkavia](#):
>
> I find the swoony-mcwonderful feeling usually starts to fade 3-5 months in, as this is generally when people start letting their guard down a little and acting like a normal human being.
The trick is to let your guard down and act like a normal human being from day one. If you start from there and they still love you, you know they’re the one.
After our first date my wife and I went back to my apartment and hung out into the wee hours. When she finally left around 2 or 3am (she had law school first thing in the morning) I acted like I was going to walk her out to her car. When we got to my front door I opened it, let her out in front of me, and said “bye” and quickly shut it.
. . .
I waited _just_ the right amount of time and reopened it. I caught her for a brief moment with a shocked look on her face and then we both laughed our heads off.
Years later I asked her when the moment she fell in love with me was, and she said that was it.
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### Author:  [@Frustrated\_Wonderer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frustrated_Wonderer)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/12 "2008-09-13T15:28:12Z")
If you’re questioning it and are in a relationship already, I’d be a little concerned.
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### Author:  [@freekalette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freekalette)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/13 "2008-09-13T16:20:50Z")
4 And a half years and counting here. I agree with **Cisco** ; being yourself from the get-go ensures that there isn’t a “let-down” period after a few months. From the first time my husband and I hung out, I admitted that I love Vanilla Ice, so as to avoid nasty surprises later.
I asked my husband, and this is what he had to say: “Some things don’t feel new, but there are other things that feel new to replace it, so the feeling never really went away. I still feel it now.” Aww, I feel all gushy and romantical now. 'Scuse me while I go plaster him with kisses! 😃
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### Author:  [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/14 "2008-09-13T16:25:08Z")
> [@freekalette](#):
>
> …I love Vanilla Ice…
It’s over between us.
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### Author:  [@Wakinyan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wakinyan)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/15 "2008-09-13T17:09:08Z")
The question was: How long will the magic last?
Some of you answers: Oh, X years and still counting, because I still love him/her.
But, in my interpretation, that’s not the question, how much you love him/her, but how long the sense of being slightly intoxicated lasts, the “high”.
\*That \*feeling don’t last for several years. I’d go so far as call it scientifically proven (but I won’t couse I don’t feel like googling for cites ;)), because we know fairly well what’s going on in a body when the person first falls in love, and we know that it doesn’t last, and we know it’s a good thing because we don’t want everybody floating around like them guys in Cypress Hill, bad for evolution.
Now, can that magic turn into love? Yes. And I’m experiencing it too, I’m looking at her right now, playing one of them Reflexive game.
But it’s not “that magic of a new relationship” now seven years and three kids later. It’s love. That’s not what the OP talked about.
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### Author:  [@freekalette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freekalette)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/16 "2008-09-13T17:21:46Z")
> [@cmyk](#):
>
> It’s over between us.
But baby, I can change! I’m sorry. Please don’t leave me. I can’t live without you. ☹ ☹ ☹ I promise, it’ll never happen again. Please, just give me one more chance.
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/17 "2008-09-13T17:25:22Z")
> [@Wakinyan](#):
>
> But, in my interpretation, that’s not the question, how much you love him/her, but how long the sense of being slightly intoxicated lasts, the “high”.
>
> \*That \*feeling don’t last for several years.
Maybe for you it don’t.
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### Author:  [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/18 "2008-09-13T17:38:57Z")
> [@freekalette](#):
>
> But baby, I can change! I’m sorry. Please don’t leave me. I can’t live without you. ☹ ☹ ☹ I promise, it’ll never happen again. Please, just give me one more chance.
Sorry baby, the magic’s gone. Ain’t nothing you, me or Robert Van Winkle can do about it now. So go – just go – before we do something we both regret! _sobs uncontrollably_
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### Author:  [@freekalette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/freekalette)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/19 "2008-09-13T17:44:33Z")
> [@cmyk](#):
>
> Sorry baby, the magic’s gone. Ain’t nothing you, me or Robert Van Winkle can do about it now. So go – just go – before we do something we both regret! _sobs uncontrollably_
Alright, it’s come down to this, then…
_rips off **cmyk** ’s clothes and starts making out, hoping for steamy make-up sex_
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### Author:  [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)
#### Post date: [September 13, 2008, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/in-your-experience/463344/20 "2008-09-13T17:48:00Z")
_long drag on a particularly sublime cigarette_
Yepp. Magic’s back.
_smoke ring_
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