# Incredibly common products which the store clerk never heard of **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 23, 2021, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225 "2021-09-23T21:29:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 30
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/583 "2022-07-15T00:21:53Z")
> [@ekedolphin](#): > > A few years ago, Paul McCartney & Wings released a new Greatest Hits album. Were there any actual songs on that album? ---
**Author:** ![JohnGalt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johngalt/32/184_2.png) [@JohnGalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnGalt)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/584 "2022-07-15T01:47:27Z")
Question: “When did Paul McCartney write Silly Love Songs?” Answer: “All of his life.” ---
**Author:** ![batsto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b2d939/32.png) [@batsto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/batsto)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/585 "2022-07-15T12:03:23Z")
We don’t sell liquor in NJ grocery stores either. But when I worked in one, people often asked where the alcohol was, and they were pretty much always looking for the drinking kind, not the rubbing kind. I’m betting that manager has had that same experience many times before. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Mouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mighty_mouse/32/7776_2.png) [@Mighty\_Mouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Mouse)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/586 "2022-07-15T12:17:21Z")
Yeah, we sell fewer units of rubbing alcohol (5 SKUs) than marjoram (2 SKUs). I’m sure 99% of people asking for alcohol are looking for booze not a topical skin disinfectant or lineament. ---
**Author:** ![doreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/858c86/32.png) [@doreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/doreen)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/587 "2022-07-15T12:17:36Z")
Most may not - but I know I’ve been in a NJ BJ’s that sells liquor. East Rutherford , I think - and it’s not in a separate building ---
**Author:** ![batsto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b2d939/32.png) [@batsto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/batsto)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/588 "2022-07-15T12:19:51Z")
I should also add that this was in the early 1990s, so it’s entirely possible things have changed. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/589 "2022-07-15T13:06:31Z")
> [@DesertDog](#): > > The Waffle House restaurants around here offer up a butteroid substance in packets with their waffles. They put some in their grits as well. My mom likes to tell the story of, in the sixties, sauntering into a store in New England and asking, “Y’all got any _gree-its_?” They burst out laughing at her pitch-perfect imitation of a Southern accent and her request for “grits,” a word they only knew as a pejorative for Southerners. My mom, of course, was born and raised in North Carolina, and had no idea what was so funny. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/590 "2022-07-15T20:54:57Z")
A friend of mine was raised in the South and told of when he was a poor college student traveling he stopped for breakfast somewhere near Philadelphia and ordered two-eggs and toast. When the plate arrived there were two slices of scrapple as well. “Whoa,” he said, “I can’t afford that.” “Don’t worry, honey,” the waitress said, “It’s just like grits where y’all come from.” ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/591 "2022-07-15T21:09:05Z")
At fast-food restaurants, I never order a “combo” or a sandwich with sides and a drink. (I dislike fountain sodas, and they’re usually overpriced, flavored water.) So when I order a hamburger, I often say, “à la carte,” but if the clerk is young, she doesn’t know what that means: “We don’t have those.” ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/592 "2022-07-15T21:14:43Z")
Maybe you should try saying “I’d like a hamburger, please.” ---
**Author:** ![bordelond](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bordelond/32/150_2.png) [@bordelond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bordelond)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/593 "2022-07-15T21:14:43Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > At fast-food restaurants, **I never order a “combo” or a sandwich with sides and a drink. (I dislike fountain sodas, and they’re usually overpriced, flavored water.)** So when I order a hamburger, I often say, “à la carte,” but if the clerk is young, she doesn’t know what that means: “_We don’t have those_ .” Ordering à la carte from a fast-food place can be challenging. 9 times out of 10, ordering a burger “_by itself_” will get the job done. Sometimes still more clarification is necessary. ---
**Author:** ![bordelond](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bordelond/32/150_2.png) [@bordelond](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bordelond)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/594 "2022-07-15T21:17:03Z")
> [@beowulff](#): > > Maybe you should try saying “I’d like a hamburger, please .” Might work, but not reliably. **Musicat** is likely trying to head off the scripted question “_Do you want that in a combo?_” (or similar). ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/595 "2022-07-15T21:20:29Z")
They’re going to ask anyway, just smile and say “no, thank you, just the sandwich”. And then if they ask if you want a drink, just smile and say “nope, just the sandwich”. They are either on auto-pilot or following a script they are required to complete. Two extra sentences from you is going to make the whole thing go much more smoothly. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/596 "2022-07-15T21:27:03Z")
And OG forbid you mention whether the order is for here or to go at the wrong point in the script / input UI. Some FF places need that first, others last. I don’t do FF often enough to know which is which, but it’s a problem if you give the info when they’re not ready. They don’t absorb it, and it fills my “I told them already so I don’t need to do it again” square. Miscommunication ensues. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/597 "2022-07-15T21:30:15Z")
I know what questions are likely to be asked, and I don’t feel obligated to waste my time and theirs if I can avoid them in advance. After all, it’s called “fast food,” not “endless unnecessary questions.” “One hamburger al la carte” is complete and succinct. ---
**Author:** ![kitap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b9e5f3/32.png) [@kitap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kitap)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/598 "2022-07-15T22:05:21Z")
How much time do you save when you’re told “we don’t have that?”. How about “I just want a hamburger by itself?” ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/599 "2022-07-15T22:08:59Z")
Back when I was a teenage Target cashier in the early 1980s, somebody asked the store manager where the “safeties” were. Said manager, a middle-aged married man, said, a bit too loud, “Safeties? What in the heck are safeties?” Condoms, you idiot! ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/600 "2022-07-15T22:31:59Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > Back when I was a teenage Target cashier in the early 1980s, somebody asked the store manager where the “safeties” were…Said manager, a middle-aged married man, said, a bit too loud, “Safeties? What in the heck are safeties?” > > Condoms, you idiot! Were “safeties” some kind of local slang? ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/601 "2022-07-15T22:35:05Z")
Yet another slang term for rubbers, prophylactics, etc. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2022, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225/602 "2022-07-15T22:35:11Z")
Not local. I’ve seen it used in old novels. Britishism, maybe? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225.md?page=29) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/incredibly-common-products-which-the-store-clerk-never-heard-of/951225.md?page=31)