# Indiana Jones what-if **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 31, 2005, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180 "2005-05-31T04:03:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![HubZilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ccd318/32.png) [@HubZilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HubZilla)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/1 "2005-05-31T04:03:02Z")
In Raiders of the Lost Ark: what if Indy didn’t get the talisman from the girl in Russia? 1. The Nazis would’ve gotten the talisman 2. They would’ve known where to look and found the Ark on their own 3. They would’ve opened it 4. The Wrath of God™ would’ve melted all the evil Nazis. ---
**Author:** ![Garfield226](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Garfield226](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garfield226)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/2 "2005-05-31T05:25:13Z")
Then the Ark would still be lost, and not in a giant warehouse. ---
**Author:** ![Stephe96](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Stephe96](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stephe96)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/3 "2005-05-31T06:03:20Z")
[QUOTE=HubZilla] In Raiders of the Lost Ark: what if Indy didn’t get the talisman from the girl in Russia? 1. The Nazis would’ve gotten the talisman I don’t know about this one. Wasn’t it implied in the movie that the Nazis had to follow Indy in order to find Marion? They knew that _he_ knew where she was…remember the scene on the airplane as the Nazi lowers his magazine and ominously watches Indy get on board? My two cents… ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/4 "2005-05-31T06:21:56Z")
[QUOTE=Stephe96] > [@HubZilla](#): > > In Raiders of the Lost Ark: what if Indy didn’t get the talisman from the girl in Russia? > > 1. The Nazis would’ve gotten the talisman > I don’t know about this one. Wasn’t it implied in the movie that the Nazis had to follow Indy in order to find Marion? They knew that _he_ knew where she was…remember the scene on the airplane as the Nazi lowers his magazine and ominously watches Indy get on board? > > My two cents… Actually, if Indy hadn’t gone, it probably would have just taken longer to find her. They knew who they were looking for, considering they knew about her father. It was probably just a matter of time before Dietrich walked into her Bar without Indy’s help… ---
**Author:** ![HubZilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ccd318/32.png) [@HubZilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HubZilla)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/5 "2005-05-31T20:17:50Z")
Assuming the Wrath could tell the Nazis were bad people (they would have their eyes open, right?), Indiana Jones was not really needed in the movie. ---
**Author:** ![middleman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9a140/32.png) [@middleman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/middleman)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/6 "2005-05-31T20:31:20Z")
That’s an excellent point. Indy was largely irrelevant in the film. The only thing his presence accomplished was the death of a monkey. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/7 "2005-05-31T20:33:49Z")
I want to know how tall is Indy. The talisman, aka the headpiece to the staff of Ra, says that the stick sould be 6 kadams high, but take back one kadam to honor the Hebrew God. Sala says that 6 kadams is about 72 inches. (or six feet) So five kadams is about 5 feet. And the staff is much taller than Indy. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/8 "2005-05-31T20:34:49Z")
> [@watsonwil](#): > > That’s an excellent point. Indy was largely irrelevant in the film. The only thing his presence accomplished was the death of a monkey. And the big guy on the airfield. ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/9 "2005-05-31T20:39:01Z")
And a lot of property damage. ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/10 "2005-05-31T21:02:28Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > And the big guy on the airfield. They both deserved it. Particulary the evil monkey. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/11 "2005-05-31T21:08:35Z")
> [@vibrotronica](#): > > And a lot of property damage. And a hell of a lot better movie. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/12 "2005-05-31T21:11:20Z")
> [@Zebra](#): > > The talisman, aka the headpiece to the staff of Ra, says that the stick sould be 6 kadams high, but take back one kadam to honor the Hebrew God. Sala says that 6 kadams is about 72 inches. (or six feet) So five kadams is about 5 feet. And the staff is much taller than Indy. I was under the impresion the distance “taken back” was not the same unit, so it was like six feet tall, less one inch. Fact is, strict standardization of units is a relatively recent practice, so the chance of _anyone_ getting the dimensions exactly right is pretty slim. ---
**Author:** ![jsc1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/5daacb/32.png) [@jsc1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jsc1953)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/13 "2005-05-31T21:22:13Z")
I just wanna hijack briefly (now that we have an Indy thread open) that the “their calculation is wrong because they only have one side of the inscription” + “they only have one side of the inscription because it’s branded on the bad guys palm” are the coolest, cleverest plot point I’ve ever seen in the movies. Bravo to Lucas, Spielberg et al. Then I have to take away coolness points for the fact the the calculation is split into two sides, in the first place. Who the hell would say “6 kadams…” (“and oh, yeah, minus 1 kadam”)?? ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/14 "2005-05-31T21:28:45Z")
> [@jsc1953](#): > > Then I have to take away coolness points for the fact the the calculation is split into two sides, in the first place. Who the hell would say “6 kadams…” (“and oh, yeah, minus 1 kadam”)?? I suppose we could retcon it to lack of room on the front side. I suspect the real reason is so they could have Indy find the Ark instead of the Nazis. BTW, **Hubzilla** , I believe that Marion was living in Nepal, not Russia. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/15 "2005-05-31T22:22:46Z")
> [@jsc1953](#): > > Then I have to take away coolness points for the fact the the calculation is split into two sides, in the first place. Who the hell would say “6 kadams…” (“and oh, yeah, minus 1 kadam”)?? The reason, of course, being, that no one could simply copy the formula and dig up the Ark without actually having the headpiece. If Indy hadn’t been around, all the Nazis would have melted, then the lid of the Ark would have slammed back down. Then the Ark would have remained until some hapless shepherd or someone came up there, opened the lid and promptly melted. Repeat ad inifintum. Indy probably saved hundreds of lives. And don’t forget the big guy with the scimitar. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/16 "2005-05-31T23:00:53Z")
If Indy hadn’t done his hero-izing, wouldn’t Hitler have had the Ark and some clear indication vis-a-vis melted Nazis that however you use the thing, opening it under those circumstances wasn’t a good idea? Maybe it could have been of use to him (philosophically questionable if not ridiculous, to be sure, but using the movie’s logic) even if Belloq made a melty mess of things with it. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [May 31, 2005, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/17 "2005-05-31T23:53:00Z")
I agree with **pravnik**. The Nazis would still know where the Ark is, and would probably send another team to recover it. And another. And another. Eventually, they probably would have found some way to harness its powers for evil. Also, everything else aside, if Indy hadn’t been there to save her, Dietrich would have tortured Marion with hot pokers, and probably killed her, in that Nepalese bar. So that was a good thing. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/18 "2005-06-01T00:13:22Z")
How nitpicky do you want to get about Raiders? There is no way that bag of sand was too heavy in comparison to the idol. ---
**Author:** ![squeegee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/squeegee/32/14537_2.png) [@squeegee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/squeegee)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/19 "2005-06-01T00:39:17Z")
You’ll note that the trick didn’t work, and the Big Ball of Death was released, no? ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [June 1, 2005, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180/20 "2005-06-01T00:43:47Z")
> [@Priceguy](#): > > And a hell of a lot better movie. Without _Indy_? :: faints :: [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/indiana-jones-what-if/306180.md?page=2)